I'll Be There For You
by Katycat1970
Summary: Mac is there for Will in his hour of need. I don't own the newsroom! Based on Lilac's prompt - Will's brother or sister dies, and he is named guardian of his young niece. Can the child help bring Will/Mac back together?
1. Chapter 1

"Where the hell is Will?"

Charlie's stern voice appeared from just behind Mac in the control room surprising her slightly because she hadn't even realised he was in the room – he did have a habit of sneaking in quietly sometimes which every now and then caught Mac unawares – it seemed tonight was one of those nights! She stole a quick look at his face – he looked calm enough on the surface but the tone of his voice told another story - he didn't sound too impressed at the apparent lack of his News Anchor a hundred and twenty seconds before they went live with their big Friday night broadcast.

For a moment Mac didn't move – she glanced up calmly and took a brief look at the anchor desk convinced that Charlie was mistaken and certain that Will would be sat there shuffling through his notes as per usual. If there was one thing Mac usually didn't have to worry about or check before a show it was that Will was in his place – he was never on her list of things to go over - never. However, this time Charlie's tone of voice was correct – Will was nowhere to be seen.

She looked around – sure that she would see him come rushing through the door at any second but another glance through the studio proved he was definitely on the missing list… Oh – this was good Mac thought to herself - An Executive Producer, supposedly one of the best in the business, who hadn't even noticed her Anchor – the face of the ACN - wasn't sitting in his chair two minutes before a broadcast. Charlie may have been her friend but he was also her boss and the very top man at ACN when it came to the News. She smiled weakly at him trying to hide her embarrassment… "I'll find him.." she muttered…

"You better do just that" Charlie smirked as she stormed past him…. "Or we're gonna look pretty stupid going live with no one sat in that chair.. It's a great way to lose viewers Mac..."

"For Christ sake – we're on air in two minutes…" She muttered to anyone who was listening as she started to head towards the door.

Mac got to the studio door in record time – just in time to see Will making his way toward his desk, his shoulders hunched and his head bowed low….

"Jesus Will – where the hell have you been?" she barked letting him know she definitely wasn't impressed… "We're on air in ninety seconds…"

Will looked over at Mac briefly, his eyes pleading with her not to say anything else and instantly Mac stopped in her tracks… She was just about to let rip with some smart comment but the look on his face told her something was wrong. She had no idea what could have happened in the thirty minutes since she'd left his office but something definitely wasn't right – it was his eyes – always his eyes that gave the game away. She had always been able to tell what Will was feeling just from the look in his eyes….

Quickly checking that everyone else was going about their normal routine Mac followed Will to the desk as he sat down and started to clip his mic into place …

"Everything okay?" she asked noticing the glassy look across his face…

When Mac received no reply and just a sad shake of his head her heart started to race a little in her chest… "Will? What's wrong?"

He took a breath, knowing he should tell her – he wanted to tell her before he burst but he couldn't find the words – not right now – not when he was going on air in a few moments time… He was convinced if he said anything now he'd fall apart on the spot and that wasn't good for a live broadcast. No, he firmly felt it was best to keep it all to himself – just for another hour and then he'd tell her – she'd know what to do to make it all better – that was one thing Will was certain of.

When he looked up again her eyes were still gazing at him – still waiting for him to say something – to explain himself… He shook his head as he heard Herb tell them all they had sixty seconds…. "Not now Mac…" he muttered quietly….

Mac knew him well enough to realise now wasn't the time – there was something there in his eyes telling her to leave well enough alone – so she would - at least until the broadcast was over. She gently reached for his hand and squeezed it tightly letting him know she understood….

"Are you okay to do this?" Mac asked, knowing his answer already. She had never known Will to miss a show - apart from his recent stay in the hospital of course. She was certain his answer would be yes but she still felt she had to ask….

Will didn't say anything in reply to her question - he just nodded his head but then, to her surprise, he gripped her hand and squeezed it back - a move that shocked Mac – he hadn't made a move first to hold her or touch her since Valentine's Day last year when she pulled the Rudy stunt…

"We'll talk after" she said, meeting his eye and both understood each other in an instant... Will nodded again and half smiled back at her gratefully before he squeezed her hand again just seconds before she pulled it away... As quickly as she could Mac made her way back across the studio to her booth hoping beyond hope that Will would be okay for the next sixty minutes.

Their relationship had moved on so much over the past few months and Mac in particular was thrilled, finally feeling more at peace over their past troubles. They seemed to be firmly past the awful events of five years ago and were definitely what most people would call firm friends – best friends even. It seemed ever since Will's hospital stay and Mac's admission that she was at North Western for that eventful session he had most definitely relaxed with her – things had undeniably changed and for the better. If she were honest, Mac would admit that the days that followed the North Western admission had been tense and had seen plenty of bickering between the pair but they'd gotten through it and had most certainly become closer – much to most people's relief.

Of course, there was no romance between the pair – well not yet! Will still didn't seem to be wanting to make a move towards something more serious between them but Mackenzie was forever hopeful... She had sworn to herself a long time ago she would wait for him – wait until he either decided he could trust her enough to be with her again or until he decided enough was enough and it was finally over. In her mind it was the least she could do after causing all the hurt and mistrust in the first place - and besides - Mac knew when there was only ever one man you were going to love you had no choice but to wait until he was ready...

"Ten seconds" came the voice of Herb beside Mac, bringing her out of her daydreams… She immediately glanced up to Will…

"Ten seconds Will" she repeated softly in his ear and he nodded slowly… "I'm here if you need me…" she whispered so only he could hear and she instantly saw a slight smile of relief appear on his handsome face.

"Good Evening. I'm Will McAvoy live from New York City on Friday January the 13th 2012…."

As Will started with his usual spiel Mac was amazed as he 'changed' in-front of her eyes - his "news" face was well and truly switched on and fixed firmly into place and all everyone could see was the consummate professional Will always was on air. Mac had definitely been right when she'd said that in the hospital all those months ago – when that red light came on the camera there was certainly 'a place' Will went to – it was automatic, second nature to him and whatever else was happening to worry him no one would ever know – not when that red light was on.

No one would know apart from Mackenzie of course…. As professional as he was he could never fool her… She could tell just by the way his eyes looked into the camera, by the way he stammered over the odd word, by the tiny balls of sweat that had unusually appeared on his forehead, by the way he constantly reached for his bottle of water at every opportunity he could and of course that look that was behind his eyes. No one else would ever think this was odd except Mac – she'd spent so many hours of her life sat here – watching him intently, listening to every word that came out of his mouth, watching every single move he made on camera – she knew something was wrong tonight and she knew she just had to get him through the next hour and then maybe he would let her in enough to know what had happened.

* * *

An hour later, after another excellent broadcast, Mackenzie made her way out of the control room heading straight in the direction of Will's office… He'd ripped out his ear piece and was on the way out of the studio before the credits had even rolled and for once Mac wasn't far behind him. As she reached Jim's desk, Mac left firm instructions with Jim and Maggie that they were not to be interrupted and indeed to send the staff home as soon as they were ready. She was certain that this would probably cause some office gossip but she'd deal with that another day – that was Monday morning's problem – Friday night's problems were just behind that door.

Mac took the last few steps towards Will's office with a slight hesitation in her step – more than anything she wished she knew what she was getting herself into here. It was so unlike Will to be like this – he was either his normal affable self or shouting if he was angry – that's all there really was to Will in the office – very rarely was there a different emotion shown at work. At home – now that was different – she remembered only too well when they used to live together – there was plenty of other emotions shown (many she couldn't talk about at work) but the only time she'd really ever seen that blank, glassy look before was on the odd occasion Will had told her about his childhood – his unhappiness and upset had been obvious on those occasions and that was all Mac could liken Will's mood tonight too.

She knocked gently on the office door but there was no answer… slowly she pushed the handle down to find Will stood at the large windows gazing out across New York - the city they both loved so very much. Quietly, she slipped into the office and watched from a distance as he ran his hand through his hair pulling at the ends in frustration….

"Will?…" Mac whispered from the other side of the room almost terrified to walk any further forward – she really hadn't seen him so withdrawn and within himself for a very long time...

It seemed Will still hadn't heard her by the time she'd reached him and placed her hand gently on his shoulder…. He spun around quickly, obviously shocked at the contact not realising that anyone else was in the room with him… The first thing Mac noticed was the two tears that were rolling down his cheeks – one single tear down each cheek…

For a moment or two she hesitated, staring at the tears, wondering what the hell she should do but then when she started to think about it she suddenly didn't give a damn what the protocol was in this kind of situation - he needed comforting - that was all that was important right now...

"Oh Billy… come here…" She didn't wait a moment longer and instantly took him into her arms holding onto him tightly as he automatically nuzzled his head into the crook of her neck – their bodies instantly remembering the way they used to hold each other in the past… "It's Jess…." He whispered into her shoulder as he gripped onto her as tightly as he dared…

"What's happened?"... Mac asked but Will didn't answer – he simply buried his head into her neck even further mumbling his Sister's name over and over again into her shoulder… They stood like that just holding onto each other in the semi-darkness for what must have been minutes – they didn't say anything at all until Will finally pulled his head up and Mac gently wiped the tears from his cheeks….

"Will? What's happened?" Mac asked again, a slight crack appearing in her voice…

Will shook his head and looked down taking a sudden interest in his feet… "Jess…" he stammered again and roughly wiped a tear from his cheek as another one crept from the corner of his eye…

Mac felt her heart drop at the mention of Will's younger sister's name – she said a silent prayer to anyone that was listening that nothing too bad had happened to Jessica – she wasn't quite sure what Will could handle when it came to Jess.

There had always been such a special bond between the two of them – Will was ten years older than his youngest sister and Mac had listened to Will's tales many a time on how he had looked after Jess throughout his childhood. All their lives he had been the perfect big brother trying to protect her during her younger years from his drunken Father and the unhappiness that had existed in the McAvoy household but from what Mac could gather, something had happened between the pair while Mac was in the Middle East. There had been an argument of some sort and although that had been patched up something had changed between the two of them – the damage that had been done through their argument manifested itself in the lack of contact between the two – the once weekly lunch/dinner dates and the daily phone-calls had most definitely stopped and it now seemed they only made contact if they needed to on special occasions like birthdays or Thanksgiving.

She looked up as she felt Will shake slightly in her arms…. "There's been an accident"…

Mac felt her heart drop to her stomach as he said the words…. He didn't have to say too much more – she could tell it was bad news – just from his actions over the last hour and the way his leg started to bounce up and down as he stood with her... "Come on…" Mac murmured, slowly taking him by the hand and heading over to the sofa…. She gently pushed him down and then took a seat next to him, linking her arm through his….

"Oh God Mac…" Will whined straight away, his bottom lip starting to quiver… "The doctor that rung me.… They don't think she's going to make it…"

Mac felt tears spring to her eyes at his words but instantly pushed them back feeling she needed to be strong here for Will – she could tell he was on the verge of falling apart and she really wasn't sure if he had anyone else to turn to these days apart from his shrink. She reached for his hand and gently tucked it inside hers hoping it would bring him some comfort at the very least….

"You have to think positively Will… You know she's a tough little thing…"

"It's her head" Will whispered ignoring Mac's hopeful words…. "She was driving…. The car hit a wall head on…"

"Was she in the car alone or was Sophie with her?" Mac asked referring to Jess's four year old daughter whose name she hadn't heard mentioned yet...

"Alone..." Will stated but then he suddenly stopped as if thinking about something... "Well they didn't say anything about Sophie... They just said Jess..."

Mac could sense she'd caused him more worries as the realisation suddenly took over his face... "They didn't mention Sophie..." he repeated louder, sounding more panicked by the second...

"sshhhh..." Mac soothed... "It must have just been Jess... they would have told you if Sophie was there too... They would have told you Will..." Mac tried to assure him…

Will nodded and gripped Mac's hand tightly... "I can't handle this Mac... Please let it not be Jess…."

"You'll be fine... You're stronger than you think you are Will..." Mac answered – praying to God she was saying the right thing for once...

She waited a moment as Will stared into space and then spoke again... "What hospital is she in?" Mac asked rubbing the top of Will's hand gently trying to encourage him to speak… "You should go and see her…." She added – knowing Will was probably going to do everything he could to try and avoid a visit….

Mac had never understood Will's absolute hatred of hospitals… When they were together, she had tried time and time again to coax it out of him and get to the bottom of his hospital fears but all to no avail… He always came up with the same line that they gave him the creeps but Mac could never get anything more than that out of him – it wasn't even as if he'd been desperately ill and had a horrendous stay in a hospital – the most he'd been ill was his recent troubles with anti-depressants and his ulcer but his fear had existed long before this recent stay in the hospital…

"Will?"

As Mac whispered his name again she felt him tense up all over and in an instant he was up and pacing the office, his hands clenched in anger by his side… "God Mac – what am I going to do if something happens to her? What if she doesn't pull through this?"...

Mac stood and made her way over to Will who was standing by the window again… "Will – you can't think like that… Jess is a fighter – you know that - she's been in a hell of a lot of scrapes before…"

"Nothing like this..." he argued back and Mac knew he was right – she just couldn't think of anything else to say right now that could help the situation – all she had was her optimism...

Will shook his head – his worries, panic and fears completely taking over all sense or reasoning…. "I'm supposed to look after her for god's sake… She doesn't have anyone else but me Mac…"

"Will – you can't blame yourself for this." Mac tried to reason as she watched him pull himself apart...

"I'm supposed to protect her Mac – don't you see that?"

His voice was raised and his temper was starting to go... Mac felt she needed to try and calm him before things got out of control... She quickly made her way over to him and tried to pull him into her arms again but he struggled free pushing Mac aside...

"I promised her Mac – I promised her I would always look after her and I didn't"...

That was all it took for Will to lose control completely… the tears that he had bravely held in for the last two hours started to fall uncontrollably…. For a moment Mac froze – she had no idea what to do - what was the normal thing to do in a situation like this? What should the ex-girlfriend, current work colleague, the hated ex-partner that's now turned into a good friend do? In days gone past she would have held him, kissed him, somehow made him feel better just through her touch - but now – now she felt guilty if she even tried to hold his hand…

She didn't get the chance to wonder much more as Will suddenly fled past her, tears streaming down his face and his face crimson red with anger and hurt….

Mac watched in silence as he made his way into the bathroom, slamming the door as he went and then she heard the lock turn.


	2. Chapter 2

"Will… please…." Mac almost begged through the locked door but still she heard nothing – she hadn't heard a sound from inside the bathroom for nearly ten minutes now which was causing her more concern by the second…. She leant against the bathroom door and let her head fall back against the wood in frustration…

"Will – please – you're scaring me now…" she said almost in a whimper as she barged her shoulder hard against the door desperate to hear something from inside – anything – even if it was a shout for her to go away.

Still getting no reply she slowly wandered over to the sofa and sat herself down just as Will's mobile rang... If Mac had realised that was all it would have taken to get him out of the bathroom she would have rung the damn mobile herself because as the phone rang the bathroom door opened revealing Will, looking extremely sorry for himself as he looked from the phone up to Mackenzie and back to the phone again.

With his long strides it didn't take long for him to reach his desk where the mobile was sitting and glance at the caller ID - he instantly looked at Mac – the worry on his face becoming more apparent by the second "It's the hospital" he said softly to her from across the room…

"Answer it…" Mac instructed from her spot on the sofa - feeling a little cross that he had put her through so much worry over the last ten minutes…

Within a second he had the phone answered and held to his ear. Sighing slightly, Mac stood and made her way over to Will and lazily laid her hand on his upper arm as he listened intently to whatever was being said down the phone, his hand once again pulling at his own hair as he shook his head…

When he hung up a minute or so later he turned to Mac and took a deep breath... "They said I should go see her as soon as possible…"

"And they're right" Mac whispered looking up into his face and noticing he seemed to have aged ten years in the last ten minutes.

For a moment Will didn't answer her as he processed the hospital's instructions…. Finally he met her gaze… "I'm sorry." he whispered simply and honestly, his bottom lip quivering again and melting Mac's heart in the process... "I shouldn't have locked the door then... I… I… I'm just sorry…."

His voice was so low and so emotional that Mac couldn't be cross with him a moment longer… Just one look at him and Mac could tell he'd been crying hard inside the bathroom and knowing Will from old she realised that was why he had locked himself away. He had never liked being seen by anyone when he was upset – not even Mac in the past had been allowed to witness him sad and troubled... To Will – tears were the kind of thing that should be dealt with alone and in private – very rarely had he cried in-front of anyone else.

For a moment the two just stared at each other – neither really knowing what to do or what to say but finally it was Will who made the move first this time – all be it very tentatively... He closed the small distance between him and Mac and reached out slowly and hesitantly for her arm – almost as if he was scared to take it – scared of what her reaction would be. It only took a slight smile from Mac to encourage him though and in an instant he had pulled her into his body and once again buried his head in her shoulder marvelling in the fact that he felt so safe there – just like he used to all those years ago. As he held her he immediately thought back to Valentine's Day when he'd held her last and he cursed himself for all the missed opportunities there had been to hold her or kiss her between then and now… He had always felt like nothing could get to him while she was in his arms and momentarily it made him forget about Jess just for a few seconds - what's more it made him forget they weren't together any longer and he kind of liked that feeling - a lot.

When he lifted his head briefly a moment later he looked into Mac's eyes and saw nothing but warmth looking back at him... "I'm scared..." he admitted so quietly, his look pleading with Mac to help him...

"I know..." Mac replied trying her very best to hold herself together so she could hold him together in return...

Once again she pulled his head down to her shoulder and let him stand there for a moment before she wrapped her own arms around his back... More than anything – it gave her time to think about what needed to happen...

"I don't know what to do Mac..." he muttered impatiently into her shoulder a moment later as he felt her gently rub his back soothingly...

If she was honest, Mackenzie didn't know what to do either - she felt like breaking down in tears herself but she knew she had to pull herself together here. This was one of the things she was supposed to be able to do – to deal with a crisis... Okay – practical things were not always her strong point but this she was good at - a crisis she could deal with most of the time. The only problem with this particular crisis was it was Will she was dealing with here – the love of her life who's heart she had already shattered once before - if she did something wide of the mark here, something that caused him even more pain she wasn't sure how she would cope with the fact that she could once again damage their ever frail, messed up thing they called a relationship.

From somewhere within, somehow Mackenzie found some new courage to push her concerns aside – she would worry about herself some other time – right now she needed to be there for Will in his desperate hour of need... She slowly untangled herself from his arms but still held onto his hands tightly...

"Do you trust me with what I say needs to happen?" she asked quietly to which Will instantly nodded his head without hesitation...

"Okay" she said a lot more confidently than she felt... "Here's what we're going to do – you may not like it but this is what's going to happen... I'm going to ring Lonny now and he will drive you to the hospital – you can be there in an hour..."

Mac hesitated slightly as she instantly felt Will tense up again but she took a deep breath and continued on unperturbed by Will's tight grip on her hands... "I know you don't like it Will... I understand that but you have to do this - You have no choice here – scared of hospitals or not you are going to go and see her... okay?"

Will didn't answer he just stood and stared into Mac's eyes... "Will?"

"I hate those places" he answered timidly a moment later - his words and actions reminding Mac of a ten year old boy standing petulantly in front of his mother...

"I know you do Will – I know they give you the creeps but think about it – Jess is hurt and she's in the best place – they're helping her you understand? She has no other family close by apart from you..."

"I know"... Will said and nodded showing Mac he understood... he relaxed his hold a little on her hands before he let out a gentle little sigh... Mac was almost too worried to ask the next question that came into her mind as she watched the uncertainty on his face… More than anything she was afraid at how she would feel if his answer was no to her question but she went ahead anyway – she had to... "Do you want me to come with you?" she whispered watching his eyes the whole time... "I really don't mind coming along if it will help…"

For a moment, Mac thought he was going to cry with relief as her words registered in his mind... he nodded his head so fast and let out a huge sigh as if all his prayers had been answered at once... "Are you sure you don't mind?" he whispered in reply once he'd gotten his breath back...

"Of course I don't... Will – I'm here for you okay? Whatever you need..."

For the first time since this began Mac noticed a small smile appear on his face and it warmed her immensely "Look – you go and freshen up, wash that face, change out of your suit and I'll get my things together and call Lonny okay?"

Will nodded again and stared down at their joined hands... He smiled up at her briefly and squeezed her hand before sliding his hand out of hers….. "Thanks Mac..." he whispered with such appreciation that Mac had to bite her lip just to keep herself from letting the tears creep out of her eyes…

"It'll be okay Billy" Mac whispered in return as he made his way towards the bathroom once more... She just wished she believed her own words.

* * *

A couple of hours later Mac found herself sat on a hard, plastic chair outside the small hospital room where Jessica was currently being treated. It had taken Mac a full five minutes to persuade Will to go into the room on his own and ever since he'd slipped through the door, forty minutes ago, Mac felt like she was having a panic attack of some sort. Her chest was tight, her mouth was as dry as anything and her hands were physically shaking at the thought of what Will was going through on the other side of that door.

Will had literally begged her to go into the room with him but Mac was convinced this was something he had to do on his own – at least for this first visit. The chat they'd had with the Doctor when they had arrived hadn't been good. As much as Mac had tried to convince Will that Jess would be okay on the drive to the hospital the more they heard from the doctor the less it seemed she was actually going to pull through this. Jessica had suffered extremely serious injuries to her head and was currently in a coma – a coma she wasn't expected to come out of.

Will had done so well to hold everything together while they were talking to the doctor but the moment Mac took her hand from his arm outside the door he started to fall apart again. The thing was, although Mac had always had a fantastic Sisterly relationship with Jessica while she was dating Will she knew that Jess had taken her and Will's break up nearly as bad as Will had himself. She had only spoken with Jess once since the actual split and that was a conversation where Jess had shouted all sorts of horrors down the phone when she learned Mac had been unfaithful to her big brother. As much as everyone always knew Will had looked after Jessica her whole life Jess was also fiercely protective of Will too so Mac had never really expected anything less from Jess at the time – it didn't mean it hadn't hurt like crazy when it happened though. From that day onwards, Mac had hardly even mentioned Jessica's name again until this evening.

The end result of it all was Mac felt she had no right to actually go into that room and as much as she wanted to do whatever she could to make this easier for Will she couldn't sit by a sick woman's bedside when the sick woman probably didn't ever want to see her again. It just wasn't ethically right in Mac's mind and to make matters worse she knew she couldn't fully explain this to Will without dragging up the past.

Finally, Mac had persuaded Will to sit with his Sister while she started to make enquiries regarding the whereabouts of Sophie – Jess's daughter. After a few calls, Mac found that the little girl was at a neighbour's house where she had been since school had finished hours earlier. She managed to find the number of the neighbour who, once Mac had explained the whole situation, had readily agreed to keep Sophie until they all figured out what to do. At least this had been one thing of Will's troubled mind when Mac popped her head around the door and explained it all to him. That was forty minutes ago though and since then Mac hadn't heard a sound from Jess's room...

So lost in her worries and concerns about Will, Mac jumped slightly when she felt a light hand on her shoulder a minute or two later – she looked up to see Lonny standing there with a sympathetic smile on his face...

"How you doing?" he asked kindly as he took the seat next to Mac...

Mac smiled and instantly felt a little calmer having a friendly face next to her...

"It's awfully quiet in there – I have no idea how he is..." Mac murmured as Lonny handed her a paper cup full of steaming liquid...

"Tea!" Lonny announced with a grin on his face... "A cup of tea always helps you English in times of crisis eh?" he joked as he gently nudged her shoulder...

"I'm American" she muttered under her breath knowing that's what Will would say on her behalf if he were in on this conversation... It had always baffled Mac as to why Will got so defensive when she was referred to as English or British but inside she really quite liked that he always jumped to her defence on that subject! She smiled to herself and took a sip of the hot liquid grateful for the warmness of the cup around her hands... "mmm – thanks" she whispered smiling again at Lonny...

"It's my pleasure" Lonny replied sipping his own drink... "And, by the way, I asked how you were doing not Will..." Lonny added with a slight tilt of his head... "You okay?"

For a moment Mac was surprised – she hadn't realised what he'd meant earlier... "Oh sorry" she murmured "I thought you were talking about Will..."

"Hey - I know he's gonna be okay – he's got you hasn't he?"

"Not that I'm much use to him at the moment" Mac answered sadly... "I'd do anything to make him feel better right now..."

Lonny smiled and shook his head at the sad look across Mac's face... "You make him feel better all the time Mac... more than you could possibly know..."

Ever since he'd met this crazy couple it had amazed Lonny that neither one of them could sort out their tangled mess of a relationship... He'd seen on many occasion how upset Will had been after appointments with Habib when he'd been trying to work through his 'Mackenzie' issues and he'd been on the bad end of Will's moods often enough when Will would say goodbye to Mac at Hang Chews leaving him uptight and frustrated with himself. Lonny had told him many a time to kiss her – to say goodnight properly but Will never did – hence the frustration on the rides back to his apartment. In Lonny's opinion it was obvious to anyone with half a brain that they were both utterly still in love with each other and more than anything he hated to see two people that he liked waste such a good chance at some happiness.

He looked at the unbelieving look on Mac's face and laughed – if she only knew the half of it... He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into him slightly... "I mean it Mac – don't give up on him yet... We both know he's an idiot at times but he's working on it – he's getting there..."

Mac smiled, feeling more hopeful than she had done in months about their relationship and was just about to push Lonny for more information as the door opened and Will appeared – his eyes red and his skin blotchy... Mac jumped to her feet, handing the tea to Lonny and was at Will's side in an instant... "You okay?" she asked automatically grabbing one of his hands...

He shook his head and scratched at his cheek so hard it left a big red mark down the side of his face… "It's driving me crazy..." he whispered... "I can't just sit there and watch her lay there when I know she's not going to wake up Kenz" he added using the name he'd not used with her for many a year. That didn't go un-noticed by Mackenzie but she knew now wasn't the right time for her to be getting emotional over a pet name – she needed to be there for Will right now not add to his problems with emotional moments...

Lonny stood and walked the short distance towards the pair... "Hey – why don't I keep watch out here and you two can go and grab a coffee and have a chat... the visitors lounge is at the end of the hallway there – it's much more comfortable..."

Mac looked at Will and he immediately nodded in agreement...

"I'll come and get you if anything changes" Lonny promised patting Will on the shoulder as he made his way out of the room...

"Thanks Man..." Will replied as Mac took his hand in hers and he blindly followed her up the corridor like a little lost puppy.

* * *

To their relief the visitors lounge was empty as Will and Mac pushed open the door and made their way inside... Mac led a still dazed Will over to the sofa and set him down before she went to the coffee machine in the corner and made them both a strong coffee...

"This all... God - I don't know... It feels like a nightmare..." Will whispered as he sat... "I have no idea what is going on..."

"I know Will – it's because you're in shock but you just being here will help her ... You have to stick with it..." Mac replied from across the room but got no reply from Will on the sofa...

A minute or so later made her way across the room with two steaming coffee's and then sat herself down next to him handing him a mug...

"Are you hungry?" she asked after a few moments of silence... Mac knew what his answer would be but it was really the silence that made her ask not the desire for food…

Will shook his head slowly and closed his eyes, leaning his weary head back against the sofa... It was only coming up to midnight and already Will felt like he'd been at the hospital for a week... He kept his eyes shut but reached out for Mac's hand – a gesture he was fast becoming far too used to doing – it seemed to bring him so much comfort though this evening...

"How do places like this not give you the creeps?" he asked a while later, not really expecting an answer from Mackenzie but asking the question all the same...

Mac took a deep breath and placed her coffee on the small table next to them… she pulled her knees up so they were tucked under her and then keeping her hand tucked tightly in his she gently stroked his arm with her spare hand... "What's happened in the past to make you so scared of hospitals Billy?"

Will wasn't expecting that question and he instantly opened his eyes to see Mac looking into his waiting for an answer... He took a breath to answer but then stopped himself... "Why do you ask?" he said instead...

"It's just that most people -when they're scared of something – there's usually a reason why..." Mac replied... "but with you – as far as I can remember there's no reason for you to be so scared of hospitals – you seem to be so terrified earlier – just at the thought of visiting…"

"I'm not scared" Will said almost nonchalantly as he sipped his coffee... "I just hate them – there's a difference..."

"Why?" Mac replied straight away not giving him a moment to think...

He didn't need to think though – his answer was natural and quick... "Nothing good ever happens in one... They're full of death – full of unhappiness... "

"I disagree" Mac replied – pleased to get him talking naturally hoping to take his mind of Jess – even if it was a sombre subject... "What about babies being born in hospital? That's happy – that' new life coming into the world – what's better than that? What about the operations that take place daily that save sick people's lives? What about saving someone's life in the Emergency Room? That's good surely?"

"God - I wish I had your optimism Mackenzie – it's one thing I've always loved about you.."

Mac stopped for a second before she replied – not quite sure how to take what he'd just said... By the time she looked at him again she could see that glassy look cover his eyes again – the look where he shuts himself off from everything – it was the same look he'd had before the broadcast that night but now there was no red light to bring him out of it...

Before she could think what to say next she heard such a deep sigh come from Will beside her that it melted her heart... "Jess isn't going to be saved is she? The ER Doctors couldn't save her... See... just makes my point – full of death..."

"But they've saved someone in there today Will…." Mac continued on… "Yeah – maybe not Jess… but someone else…"

Will pulled his hand away from Mac's and wiped away the tear that had crept out of his eye as he was talking about his little sister... "I'm not really sure that helps me right now."

"I'm sorry"… Mac whispered and cursed herself for her blunt words when she received no reply from Will…

"Did I ever tell you about the first time I had to take my Mom to the Emergency Room?" Will asked a rather astonished Mac…

Hardly believing the words she was hearing Mac gazed up at him and whispered a very quiet "No."

A moment later Will burrowed deeper into the sofa and surprisingly pulled Mac into him so her head was resting on his chest... After a few seconds she felt him take a deep breath... "One day, when I was about fourteen... that bastard was so drunk that he beat my Mom so badly... I was at school so I didn't see it happening - I couldn't stop him that time... You see Mac – I used to make a nuisance of myself with him when he was hitting her... that way – he'd start on me and forget about her you see... But not that day... I came home from school that particular day – Jess was only four I think and I remember I'd picked her up from pre-school on the way home cause Mom was feeling sick that morning... as I got in I could hear her whimpering somewhere and I just knew something was badly wrong..."

Will stopped his tale and for a moment Mac could sense him get lost in his thoughts – his breathing quickened and she swore she could hear his heart thumping way too loudly inside his chest…. Knowing from old that it was better to let him set his own pace with these memories of his childhood Mac laid her arm across his chest and waited for him to be ready again….

A minute later Mac felt his arm pull her a little tighter into his body as he continued…. "I remember I sent Jess into the garden to play while I searched for Mom... God, Kenz – you wouldn't have believed the state of her when I found her... she couldn't move, there was blood on the floor and he was just passed out – drunk - in their bed – leaving her on the floor where she lay... You know, that was the first time I ever had to ring for an ambulance and I remember being so fucking scared that I could hardly talk down the phone…. I spent the whole night in the Emergency Room that night with Jess cuddled into me her crying the night away – not understanding why her Mommy was so ill... Honestly – to this day that was the longest night of my entire life.…"

Will finally stopped and took another deep breath before Mac heard a sob in his throat which he tried so hard to disguise as a laugh… "See - You're right Mac – she was the lucky one that day - they fixed her that night in the Emergency Room... but she was only fixed until the next time you see... Until the next time you visit the ER with your Mom or your younger brother or the time that he managed to catch you with a punch and breaks your nose…."

It was times like this that Mac felt so utterly useless to Will… She had no idea what to say – how to make him feel better but she remembered years ago when she had asked what she could do to help that he used to tell her it just helped being able to hold her and trust her enough with his memories – so that's all she would do right now… Mac lifted her head and pressed the briefest of kisses onto his jaw – hoping beyond hope that she wasn't crossing the 'Friendship' line with him this evening… For a moment he looked down and smiled before he reached and pushed a stray lock of hair from her eyes…. "It's okay you see – the next time he made the mistake of trying it while I was in the house... that's when the bottle went over his head Mac – I'm telling you - I wasn't going to go through that hell in the Emergency Room again - never… I never saw him again after that night with the bottle…."

"And you'll never have to see him again Will… You remember that – you remember that you saved your Mom and Jess and all your family from a whole lot more hell from him…. You saved them…"

Will nodded and took a deep breath… "I will never understand to this day why she put up with him for so long… why she would never let the police get involved... How can a Mother ever take that and watch her children get hurt?... I loved her Mac – my Mom – I really did but I can't ever understand why she stayed with him for so long…"

"I know Will… but… she must have had her reasons though"…

"Reasons?" Will questioned with a twisted, bitter look on his face… "You're kidding right? What reasons are there to stay around for that?"….

"Well… Maybe she was scared to leave him when she had four children to take care of?… Maybe it was money?... I don't know – you hear stories of women staying for all kinds of reasons when they know they should leave…" Mac hoped it was a sensible enough answer for him but she didn't think it was really – but seriously, she had no idea what else to say to him at that moment…

"I meant to ask her you know" Will carried on ignoring Mac's reply… "Before she died I wanted to ask her why she didn't leave him but I always chickened out – I didn't want to upset her… God, she'd had enough upset in her life… Then she got so sick so suddenly that I couldn't ask… She had lived for twenty years without him around – I didn't want to bring it all back to her on her deathbed…" He sighed again and Mac felt him run his hand through his dishevelled hair... "See – that was another week spent in hospital watching someone I love die Mac – and now I have to do it all over again with Jess…. You see why I can't stand them?"

Mac nodded her head and she really did start to understand his reasons – it was easy to see why he might want to just block it all out and pretend it wasn't happening…. The sigh that left his mouth a moment later revealed so much emotion that Mac hoped beyond hope Will couldn't feel the tears that had rolled down her cheeks through his last speech… She tried to wipe them away without him seeing them but she never had been able to fool him and soon enough she felt him squeeze her arm a little tighter….

"I'm sorry…" he whispered a moment later trying to soothe her…. "I didn't mean to upset you…"

"You didn't Billy... honest... You can talk to me about this – about anything" Mac almost pleaded with him – desperate for him not to shut himself away from her any longer…. "I just hate thinking about what you went through… how much you had to put up with... No child should ever have to be that person you were back then…." Mac murmured as his hand slowly rubbed her upper arm…. More than that, Mac hated to think that she had added to his hurt and upset with her own selfish betrayal years later – she may not have hurt him physically like his Father did but she knew she had caused him as many tears mentally as that bastard had and for that she would forever compare herself with the man he hated beyond belief.

Nothing was said for a while and Mac went back to letting him have his thoughts... She was surprised though, when she rested her head back on his chest a few minutes later, to hear his deep even breathing… She looked up to see his eyes firmly shut and was amazed that he'd managed to drift off to sleep…. Feeling exhausted and drained from the emotions of the last few hours she closed her own eyes thinking that she'd rest them just for a few minutes before Will woke up and had to go back to Jessica.

Neither of them heard Lonny open the door an hour later and neither saw the smile that spread across his face as he saw how they were cuddled together on one end of the sofa. He'd never seen a couple – who were supposedly just friends - so wrapped up in each other's arms and still managing to look so calm and peaceful on such a day of utter misery. Lonny crept across the room, picked up one of the fleece blankets in the corner and made his way back to Will & Mac.

Quietly and extremely carefully he wrapped the blanket round the snuggled up couple and smiled nodding his head in delight the whole time. They may be stuck in some kind of hell right now but he was hopeful that a little bit of good could come out of all this mess – what do they say? - that there's a sunny side to every situation? Well maybe, just maybe, this horrendous accident could bring these two people a little bit closer and make them realise just how much they mean to each other.

* * *

**A/N - Thank you SO much for all the lovely comments to Chapter 1 - really very much apprecitated...**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter too...**

**Katy**

**x**


	3. Chapter 3

Mackenzie woke around five thirty in the morning and found herself laid out on the sofa with a blanket wrapped tightly around her body… For a very brief moment she wondered where the hell she had woken up – at first she thought she might be on one of the sofa's in the newsroom – she had often woken up on the sofa in her office but then suddenly she remembered the awful events of the evening before and it all came flooding back to her.

Slowly she pulled herself into a sitting position and stretched wrapping the blanket around her shoulders… She had only intended to sleep for a few minutes but it seemed she was obviously more tired than she had initially thought. Then she remembered Will and that he was most definitely with her when she'd fallen asleep and how easy it had been to drop off to sleep – easier than it had been for nearly five years. But then again, it always had been easy when she was snuggled against his side – she could never deny that. Rubbing her eyes gently she guessed he had gone back to Jessica and hoped that he'd at least gotten some sleep.

A few minutes later, after checking her work emails and emailing Charlie, Mac left the visitors lounge and made her way slowly along the corridor towards Jess's room. Still not wanting to go inside but not wanting to disturb Will by knocking Mac carefully pushed open the door a tiny bit to find Will sat at his Sisters bedside holding her hand tightly with his head buried on the bed beside Jess. She leant against the door frame and watched him for a few moments amazed at how he got on with his life each day after his childhood and the emotional baggage he carried around in his head on a daily basis – it was no wonder he could never really switch his brain off and relied heavily on sleeping tablets just to get him through the long lonely nights. Mac sighed… he really was an amazing man at times and for the millionth time over the past few years she cursed herself for her stupidity and letting him get away from her – it sometimes haunted her when she thought of the life she could have had with him and this was one of those moments where she had so many regrets rushing around her head it was hard to breathe.

So caught up in her thoughts was she that Mac didn't even realise she'd sighed which Will had obviously heard… He turned his head slightly and saw Mac in a world of her own leant against the door frame… For a moment a blank look crossed his face but he soon shook it away...

"Hey.." he whispered bring Mac out of her thoughts…

Mac smiled and winked at him… "How's it going?" she whispered back…

Will nodded and beckoned her to join him… "Come and say hello to her Mac…."

"I'm not sure she'd want to see me" Mac said ever so quietly from the door her head dropping - almost as if she were ashamed…

"Don't be silly" Will replied and held out his hand to her… "Jess was really pleased that you and I have become friends again recently... she'd want to see you..."

Mac still wasn't sure she should be here but the pleading look on Will's face meant she was always going to give into him – she knew she'd never deny him anything these days. She slowly made her way over towards the bed and stood just behind Will resting her hand lightly on his shoulder and gazing down at Jessica…. Mac could hardly believe the sight before her as she looked at Jess lying so still and lifeless in the bed. The last time she had seen Jess had been on a girlie night out six years ago – just a few months before Mac had split with Will…. God, they'd gotten themselves totally wrecked that night and Mac smiled as she remembered Will had come to both of their rescue that particular evening – the poor man had two very drunken women to take care of for twenty four hours! And of course he had.

Mac thought back to that night - Jess had looked so young and beautiful and had always been so vibrant and full of life - the life and soul of any party but here, lying there in this hospital bed – well the sight simply broke Mac's heart.

She sighed and gripped Will's shoulder from behind…. "Oh Will" she whispered into his ear, a lone tear escaping her eye…. "Some things in life are just so unfair..."

Will looked over his shoulder and nodded in understanding at Mac – it was how he felt yesterday – the shock of seeing the once so lively woman lying there so lifeless was a complete jolt to the system to say the least... He gently let go of Jess's hand and walked Mac over to the window... "I've sent Lonny home..." he whispered... "It was no point him being here all night too."

Mac nodded and reached for Will's hand... "You okay?" she asked – worried about him and the events of the previous evening...

Mac wasn't really expecting what was coming next from Will... He pulled his hand from hers and spoke but his eyes didn't meet hers – they looked at a spot on the wall instead... "Mac - you must be tired too... why don't you head back to the City and I'll call you later?"...

Mac shook her head – her first reaction was a definite no. There was something different about him this morning – maybe more confident about the situation or maybe he was more scared but just trying to hide it... She wasn't really sure what it was but she wanted to be here for him all the same... "No – I'll stay with you a bit longer..." She said offering him a weak smile...

"Mac - there's no point both of us being utterly exhausted... I'm okay here now and one of us has to be fit for work on Monday and I don't think it'll be me... Why don't you head home and I'll call you later..."

"Did you sleep any?" Mac asked, changing the subject and noticing how dark his eyes were…

"A little... on the sofa..." he answered feeling more than a little embarrassed at the fact they'd fallen asleep together so easily... "I woke about two a.m. - I thought I'd leave you sleeping – you looked so comfortable..."

Mac smiled and quietly uttered a thank you – her cheeks blushing slightly... "What about food? Have you eaten?" she questioned...

He shook his head and let his gaze wander out to the park below the hospital window... "I'm not hungry right now..." he muttered knowing Mac was probably not going to accept that answer...

"Will..."

"Shhh - I know I need to eat..." he answered her unanswered question which made Mac frown a little at her obvious predictability... She hoped she wasn't coming across as a nag already…

"Want to go and get an early breakfast?" Mac asked looking at her watch – it was approaching six a.m. and neither of them had eaten since their late lunch yesterday afternoon in the Newsroom...

Will smiled slightly knowing Mac wouldn't let this drop... "I'll make you a deal" he said with a little of the old 'Will' sparkle in his eye... "I'll come and eat as much breakfast as you want as long as you go home and rest afterwards – there really is no point us both being here now Mac... Sound fair?" he asked...

"I really don't mind hanging around..." Mac said quietly – part of her finding it odd that she didn't want Will to send her away and part of her worried as to why he was trying to get rid of her... "I don't like the thought of you being here by yourself..."

"Hey... I'll be fine... I have to ring Stephen & Jill sometime soon..." Will said sadly, referring to his other Sister and Brother... "They need to know too..."

"Are you going to be okay calling them?" Mac asked...

"I'll have to be... I have no choice really - they need to know..."

"I can call them for you if it'll help" Mac offered but inside dreading the thought of having to make a call like that...

"It's okay..." Will replied... "I should do it... they need to hear it from me..."

Mac left it a moment and followed his eyes back out to the park… a moment later she rested her hand on his arm lightly….

"Will... I'm worried about you..." Mac admitted, chewing her bottom lip as she always did when she was nervous about something... "Have I upset you?"

"Course not…" Will tried to assure her… "I'll be fine... How about I promise to take a break and ring you every few hours? Sound like a deal?"

Mac had a feeling she wasn't going to win this with Will and maybe he did just want to be alone for a while with Jess... She probably wasn't doing much good if he had to worry about her wellbeing too – the last thing she wanted to do was cause him more concern than he already had.

She nodded her head and smiled weakly at him... "Okay - deal..." she whispered dejectedly ... "Breakfast first though..."

Will glanced over at Jess and then nodded knowing he couldn't avoid Mac's want to feed him right now…. "Breakfast first!" he whispered in reply…

* * *

Will and Mac managed to find a Deli over the road from the hospital which was doing a roaring trade at that time of the morning. After agreeing not to tell Lonny that they'd snuck out without him Mac made Will sit down in a booth while she ordered him the biggest breakfast she dared to – she had no idea when he'd eat again and was well aware Will probably wouldn't bother with little details like food once she was gone. They ate their breakfast pretty much in silence as Will seemed to be lost in his own thoughts but after they left the Deli Mac had managed to persuade Will to go for a walk in the adjoining park with her – just to clear his head a little before she headed back to the City and he back to Jessica.

They were sat together on a bench near a small pond watching the world go by... Will took a look at Mac sat shivering beside him and marvelled how lucky he was to have her as a friend these days – they really had come so far over the past few months and although it had absolutely scared the life out of him when he'd awoken to find her wrapped so tightly in his arms he already knew that he would have fallen apart completely without her over the last twelve hours.

"You seem miles away"... Will whispered nudging her shoulder with his own shoulder... "Isn't it me that's supposed to be daydreaming?"...

Mac giggled and again bit her bottom lip... "Sorry... Not doing a good job of taking your mind of things am I?"

"Hey – you're doing a great job... I couldn't have even got here without you Mac..." Will said loving the smile that appeared on her face at his words...

Mac left it a moment and took a look at Will wondering whether she should ask what had been on her mind for hours now...

"What's wrong?" Will asked, sensing something was bothering her...

"What happened with you and Jess while I was away?" Mac asked bluntly….. "You used to be so close before…"

She instantly regretted her question as Will looked away sadly shaking his head... She turned slightly so she was facing him... "Sorry – I shouldn't have asked." she added quickly, cursing herself for asking too much... "Honestly Will - You don't have to talk about it."

To her surprise though, a moment later, Will looked back at her... "We had an argument – about five years ago now… me being the protective big brother again apparently ruined her life..."

"I find that hard to believe" Mac replied with a look of confusion on her face – she certainly wasn't expecting to hear that…

"Well according to Jess I did…"

"What happened?"

Will took a deep breath and leant back against the bench…. "She hooked up with this guy – I can't even remember his name even but she fell for him big time... Mac – anyone with half a brain could see he was a total loser but no matter what we said Jess was convinced he was the man for her – the love of her life apparently. Honestly, he spent so much of his time drunk and I know there were drugs involved too – I could see it... Stephen could see it too when he came to visit – he took an instant dislike to him so it wasn't just me being me – you know – over-protective... He was wrong for her Mac – he wasn't in love – not like Jess was with him... Jess was smitten..."

Will reached inside his coat pocket and pulled out a packet of cigarettes... He looked at Mac as if asking her permission - knowing how much she hated him smoking - and Mac just nodded her head... Will lit the cigarette and took a long drag clearly enjoying the buzz it gave him... "I met them for dinner in New York one night – Jess disappeared to the Ladies room and I confronted him – asked him his intentions sort of thing and he laughed in my face – told me Jess was just a bit of fun – that he wasn't hanging around for anything long term... It broke my heart Mac... do you know how hard it is to watch someone treat your little sister like that and your sister not to even realise she's being treated badly?"

Will stopped briefly and took another drag of his cigarette...

"What happened then?" Mac asked...

"A couple of weeks later Jess turned up at my place one day un-announced which was so unlike her… I know she used to do that a lot when you were there but since you'd been gone her visits were, well, less frequent shall we say... Mac – she had this awful black eye and bruise across her cheek bone... She told me she fell over in the snow and hit her head but I didn't believe her – not for one minute... I bought her inside – looked after her for the weekend and after a long heart to heart one night, I told her what he'd said about not being staying around... I asked her outright if he'd done this to her and she just started crying – telling me she was pregnant..."

"Sophie?" Mac reasoned and Will nodded…

"I had no idea on earth what to do or say – I felt so useless that day... All I could think was I wanted to kill him..."

Mac could tell Will was starting to get tense again and noticed his watery eyes... She felt dreadful pushing him into this – once again she should have left well enough alone... She turned to Will and rested her hand gently on his arm... "Will – you don't have to say anymore... I'm sorry – I shouldn't have asked..."

Will took Mac's hand from his arm and held it tightly in his own hand – even though he'd made a conscious decision that morning not to hug or hand hold today he couldn't help himself – she was being so damn comforting at the moment and his resolve seemed to be at rock bottom right now... "It's okay... honestly – I've been wanting to tell you this for a while – I just never figured how to start the conversation or if you'd want to know even..."

"Of course I would have wanted to know Will... You know I always loved Jess like a Sister..."

Will nodded, shrugged his shoulders and attempted a smile... "I just wasn't sure if family stuff was off limits between you and me these days..."

Mac nodded in agreement - she knew what he meant – although they had become a lot closer recently they still hadn't had too many 'Personal' conversations – neither really knowing where the friendship line started and finished between them these days. They were good friends most definitely, but they also had a past – a past where they were lovers and that made being just good friends at the moment more than a little bit confusing at times.

Mac closed her eyes for a second – mainly to stop the emotions that were whirling around her body right now... She followed Will's line of sight and watched him as he watched a little girl playing baseball with her Father – for a moment he had a serene – almost happy – look on his face but it didn't last long as he suddenly remembered he was telling Mac what happened – he looked up and took a deep breath…

"To this day I don't know if I did the right thing but I went down to see him one day when Jess first told me she was pregnant – when I knew Jess was at work... told him to do the right thing by her or else... The next thing I hear was the bastard disappeared... I was relieved if I'm honest Mac but Jess hated me for months after he went... She wouldn't take my calls, wouldn't let me visit with her – all she kept telling me it was my fault that her baby would have no Father."

"Surely you don't believe that do you?" Mac asked, her heart aching with pain for him...

"Not really but it still hurts when someone that means so much to you says that to you..." Will admitted as he swallowed hard before carrying on… "Anyway, we kind of patched it up when the baby came along – I was so relieved when she called me first when she went into labor – even if it was slap bang in the middle of a broadcast.." Will chuckled as he remembered back to that day four and a bit years ago….

"I've helped her out a lot - financially mainly... It's been better since Sophie was born but it's not the same as it was Mac... every time we speak about Soph or family stuff I can hear resentment in her voice... she's so damn stubborn sometimes..."

"She takes after her big brother there I'm afraid" Mac said quietly – squeezing his hand to let him know she was teasing...

Will nodded knowing that Mac was right there... Even though she was teasing, and they had joked about his stubbornness in the past, Mac had a point. For starters, Will knew they would probably be back together now if it wasn't for his damn stubbornness – unfortunately it was most definitely a trait Will inherited from his Father and Will hated that more than anyone would possibly know. He looked up at Mac with watery eyes and shook his head... "It pained me – even a couple of years after she still wanted him... She couldn't see that she was better off without him – that he was just like our own Father... It reminds me so much of how Dad was with Mom and I couldn't bear to watch someone I love go through that again..."

Mac couldn't help herself... She leaned forwards and wrapped her arms around him bringing him into her in a tight hug and holding onto him as if her life depended on it... Will hardly moved at first but after a few seconds he wrapped his arms around her too feeling that wonderful 'safeness' again – the safeness that had started to terrify him since falling asleep with her last night – he wouldn't allow himself to get used to this – not even under these horrendous circumstances.

On the other side of the hug Mac was desperate not to pull away but soon her brain kicked into action and she wondered again just how far they'd crossed the line of friendship over the past twelve hours and how hard all this hugging and hand holding was going to be to stop... She pulled away slightly and smiled when Will's eyes met hers... "You okay?" she asked convincing herself that this is what friends did for each other...

"Just about…" Will replied with a distant look in his eye... He cursed the fact that his heart seemed to be racing right now…

"Will - You're an amazing brother – they're lucky to have you..." Mac said as Will stared down at the floor trying to catch his breath...

"I'm not so sure…" Will replied shaking his head... "Me & Jess just about get along, Jill is wasting her life away in California doing god only knows what, and Stephen, well Stephen stays in the military so he doesn't have to see any of us... Great family huh?"

"Well, I think you're amazing..." Mac repeated... "I don't know how you do it - how do you carry so much baggage with your childhood and family and still function on a daily basis... I think I would have given up years ago."

"I don't have any choice do I?" Will answered shrugging his shoulders... "Believe me I've thought about it for hours on end but it's just a case of grin and bear it… I can't change any of what's happened - all I can do is get on with things..."

Will stood up the moment he'd finished his sentence and pulled his coat around him tightly... "I should get back to Jess"...

It was obvious that he'd had had enough of talking…. It wasn't very often that he opened up like this so Mac knew well enough to let it drop when he'd had enough – she was pleased enough already that he'd felt that he could tell her the whole story – especially after last nights talk about his Father. Mac stood to join him and together they headed back towards the hospital in search of a cab that would take her back to Manhattan...

"Are you sure you don't want me to hang around?" Mac asked a couple of minutes later as they neared the main entrance of the hospital… "I really don't mind…" but Will was already shaking his head before Mac had finished her question...

"There's no point in both of us just waiting… honestly – you get back and sort everything with work… I can't see me being there on Monday Mac…."

Mac nodded and smiled as the cab Will had hailed stopped beside them…. "Don't worry about work" Mac said – her professional EPs head well and truly in place… "I've emailed Charlie this morning and I'll get Elliot booked in for this week… Sound okay?"

"I'm sorry" Will muttered staring down at his feet…. "I know you don't like working so much with Elliott…"

"Hey – don't even think like that" Mac replied gently laying her hand on his… "This is where you need to be okay? Don't worry about the show… I don't want you to worry about anything except Jess okay?"

Will nodded and Mac couldn't help but notice that blank look of worry spread back across his features as Will placed his hand on the door of the cab…

"Will – are you sure you don't want me to stay… I promise you I don't mind"

Suddenly Will felt such confusion… His heart wanted to beg her to stay - to take her up on her offer as he was convinced he couldn't get through the rest of the day without her but his head won this particular battle and he heard his mouth assure her that he wanted her to go back to the City… "Honestly Mac – I just don't think there's any point exhausting both of us out here…" Will replied quietly… "You're more help back home with work - at least I don't have to worry with you looking after the show… I would if it was just Jim back there on his own…"

"He's fine…" Mac tried to assure him… "He can handle it."

"I'd just feel better with you there…" Will replied looking down at his feet…

Mac smiled although she didn't fully mean the smile – for some reason her insides were knotting up already at the thought of leaving him here alone – but what else could she do? She had offered three times now to stay and it was obvious he wanted some time here alone even if he did look absolutely petrified right now.

When she looked up Mac saw Will had opened the door to the cab for her… For a moment she had no idea what to do and she winced at the horrendous moment of awkwardness there suddenly was between the two of them – honestly it hadn't been this awkward with Will since – well ever….. Should she hug him Mac thought? They'd already done that far too much over the past few hours seeing as they were just friends? If she hugged him Mac knew she would place a kiss onto his cheek and she wondered again just how this had got so awkward between the two of them… Then she remembered falling asleep together and things started to fall into place - she knew Will and his petty regrets much too well...

Without saying a further word Mac got into the back seat of the cab but she couldn't help her eyes once again looking up into his…. "Promise you'll call" she asked hopefully, feeling utterly stupid – almost like she was a teenager begging him for a second date or something…

"Of course…." Came the tentative reply from Will with a small smile added afterwards…

Will shut the door and watched as the cab pulled away… Almost instantly he felt a sharp pain in his chest and he couldn't help the fear that suddenly coursed through his veins as she disappeared from view. He had absolutely no idea how he was going to get through the rest of this weekend without Mac by his side but he also knew he couldn't carry on with her there – all this hugging and hand holding was becoming far too much for him to cope with – he couldn't handle the feelings that were happening here – these feelings of actually being together like they used to be when Mackenzie was clearly doing all this out of friendship.

No. He admitted to himself that it might be his stubbornness rearing its ugly head but Will felt it was safer dealing with this alone. If he was alone he wouldn't be tempted to take Mackenzie into his arms and kiss her non-stop until all this misery was over – a move that would probably mean he'd lose her friendship forever. He couldn't bear the thought of that.


	4. Chapter 4

Mackenzie sat in the back of the cab and tried her best to hide the tears that were involuntarily rolling down her cheeks. She knew the driver was sneaking looks at her through his mirror, probably cursing his luck for picking up a clearly emotional woman, but right now she simply didn't care. She tried to convince herself the tears were because of the situation with Jess but in the back of her mind she knew that wasn't true. She'd always been good in a crisis and had never been a crier in this sort of situation - however close to home the crisis was she'd always managed to hold herself together. So why the tears now?

Mac sighed and roughly wiped at her cheeks…. If she was completely honest with herself she knew the tears were because of Will – it always seemed to be that way recently – tears were only ever shed because of Will McAvoy these days. She simply felt like he was pushing her away - yet the tears weren't even for being pushed away - she was well used to Will keeping her at a distance these day - it was almost as if the tears were a second realisation that they actually weren't together any longer and the way they were going they never would be.

Totally stupid Mackenzie thought to herself as they sped along the quiet streets towards her apartment - they hadn't been together for nearly six years so how come it was hitting her so hard right now? The fact was that she could easily see how badly Will was hurting at the moment – he'd been so reliant on her last night and she actually felt she was helping him somehow – especially as he had opened up to her about his childhood for the first time in seven years - but since she'd woken up this morning and found him gone from the Sofa he seemed to be keeping her firmly at bay.

The thing with Will and being upset when they were together before, she had always been able to help him when he was suffering or struggling with something - he was always so easily calmed by her touch rather than her words. In Will's mind words could be twisted, not meant, lies could be made easily but actions had always spoke volumes over words as far as he was concerned. A simple hug or a gentle rub of his back could soothe and calm him more than half an hour of loving words.

Mac knew that if this had happened six years ago when they were together then she would still be with him right now – helping him come to terms with everything… She would hold him, hug him or run her fingers through his hair throughout this dreadful trauma and as daft as that might sound to many it would help Will cope more than anyone could ever realise.

But they weren't together and somehow Mac had to come up with a different way to help him right now as this situation was only going to get worse - there was only going to be more hurt over the next few months because it was very evident Jessica wouldn't be waking up from her coma. Mac had realised that over the past twelve hours and she was pretty sure Will had too. He might be heartbroken but he wasn't stupid.

Back at the hospital Will was sat next to Jess's bed again just watching and waiting. Waiting for the inevitable to happen…. waiting with a heart that was aching so much it was making him feel sick to his stomach…. waiting with so much on his mind and cursing his own damn stubbornness that he'd just sent away the one person that could probably make this a whole lot easier for him.

* * *

After a pretty horrific weekend for all, Monday soon came around and Mac found herself at the final run down meeting but however hard she tried she couldn't keep her mind on the job and it had been pretty much like that all day. Things were getting out of control in her mind and it was a good job that Jim seemed to have taken over things otherwise the show was going to be a disaster that night.

Will had just about kept his end of the deal of ringing her over the weekend but it always seemed to be after she sent him a couple of texts first. Each time she spoke to him on the phone she could tell he wasn't really in a talkative mood. She felt like she was having to drag information out of him and his answers to her questions were so short that Mac was convinced he was shutting down already – whether it was with the situation or whether it was with her she didn't really know and part of her really didn't want to find out – just in case she didn't like the answer. She had offered once on Saturday evening to go and sit with him and twice on Sunday but each time Will had turned her down flat, insisting that there was nothing more she could do and that he preferred to be alone with Jessica.

When she'd found out on Sunday evening that Lonny was visiting with Will and taken him a fresh change of clothes it had knocked her for six. So much so, at 7pm she took herself off to bed and shut down herself. She didn't know why she felt so upset at him calling on Lonny instead of her but she did – she felt like it was a total slap in the face and she hadn't got over it yet twenty four hours later. All day long she'd been on automatic – gliding through the day but not really feeling anything or even realising half of what was going on around her.

Suddenly she was bought out of her thoughts as she felt a hand on her shoulder… she looked up to see Charlie stood next to her and an empty conference room…. "Where is everyone?" Mac asked amazed at the fact twelve people had somehow left the room without her knowing – just where had her head gone to?

Charlie smiled a smile that spread so much warmth through her that for the first time since Friday Mackenzie felt almost normal inside… Charlie sat himself down in the chair next to Mac and reached for her hand… "Why don't you call it a day for today eh? Go and see him – he could do with it and so could you…"

"I can't Charlie – we're on air in an hours' time…" Mac replied professionally, pulling her hand away from his and fiddling with her cherished notebook, but she soon felt Charlie's hand on her arm stilling her…

"Kiddo – you're not fooling any of us here – especially not me…. Forget tonight's show... Jim can handle this easily – he's been trained well…. Go be with Will – he needs you right now…"

Mac had been struggling so much to keep her emotions in tact since Friday evening but she could feel it all starting to fall apart right now… As the first tear crept from her eye she gripped Charlie's hand… "He doesn't want me there Charlie – he's making that quite clear right now…"

"I know kid... I called him yesterday and he said he sent you home... Between you and me - I think he's regretting that now but don't tell him I told you!" Charlie chuckled before he winked at Mac… "Come on – you surely don't believe all that rubbish pouring from his mouth? That he's okay on his own?"

Mac looked up surprised at Charlie's tone as he continued… "I thought you knew him better than the rest of us put together Mac and you're backing down at the first hurdle? Sure doesn't sound like the Mackenzie I know and love."

"It's not that easy Charlie – not when it comes to Will & I…"

"Rubbish." Charlie replied firmly… "The Mackenzie I know would see that he's hurting like crazy out there alone… see that he's probably terrified of losing his Sister, terrified that he needs to rely on you so much at the moment and terrified of the feelings that relying on you so much brings him. And knowing Will he's probably petrified to tell you any of it Mac – you're the one person he needs but the one person he can't admit that to."

"I've offered to go back there Charlie but he says no…" Mac replied but Charlie soon interrupted her again…

"The Mackenzie I know wouldn't believe the crap he's spouting right now… the Mackenzie I know would get off her backside and go out to the hospital and give him a break right now."

"I can see all the hurt Charlie – only too well… I just don't want to upset him any more than he already is – it's difficult to know where the line is between us… he seems so sure every time I ask if he needs me there - he just keeps saying no."

Charlie's face didn't change one little bit – he sat and looked Mac direct in the eye… "The Mackenzie I know wouldn't take no for an answer when it came to looking after him."

"Well, maybe the Mackenzie you know Charlie, just doesn't know what to do for the best right now..."

"Come on Mac – stop feeling sorry for yourself here... Get out to that hospital right now before he falls apart completely... He needs you more than he needs anything..."

Mac sat in shock for a moment – hardly believing what Charlie was saying but also realising instantly that he was right – again. She was feeling sorry for herself here and Mac knew that was selfish of her... Where had the real Mac been for the past thirty six hours - she had been so busy worrying what she could and couldn't do by him, so worried that she'd do something wrong that she hadn't really been thinking straight.

Mac opened her mouth to speak but Charlie was on his feet and already heading towards the door realising his work there was done - he'd gotten his message across much easier than he'd first expected… "Jim's in charge tonight and you're to get your ass over to that hospital …. And that's a direct order Mackenzie."

For a couple of minutes Mac didn't move a muscle – she sat in shock trying to get a plan together – wondering what to do – she'd never walked out on a show in her whole time as a producer – should she do it now? At that moment Lonny poked his head around the door with a smile on his face… "Charlie said you'll be needing a lift to the hospital straight away?"

Mac smiled and chuckled at Charlie's busy bodying routine but she also realised what she had to do… "Give me five minutes to get my things together and we need to stop at Enrico's on the way."

* * *

Mac quietly pushed open the door to Jess's hospital room and straight away she melted at the sight before her… Will was sat in the big comfy chair next to Jess's bed with a book reading aloud to his Sister… Honestly – all Mac could see at that moment was a fourteen year old boy reading his four year old sister a goodnight story - her heart swelled in her chest and all she could do for a moment was watch the scene before her. As he read though she noticed how his eyes seemed to be drooping shut every few seconds – he looked utterly exhausted and Mac wondered just how much sleep he'd had over the past seventy two hours. Probably not a lot she concluded.

She quietly crept inside the door and leant against the door frame for a moment – she had no idea how to play this if she was honest. In the car on the way over she had thought non-stop about Charlie's words – how she had completely forgotten what her role in this was and she had made her mind up she wasn't going to take any of his 'I'm okay' crap.

"Hey you..." Mac murmured as she crept across the room - obviously surprising Will as he jumped up out of his chair in an instant….

"Mac." He said simply and couldn't hide the delight on his face if he tried – the smile that appeared across his weary face said everything that needed to be said.

"Any change?" Mac asked looking at Jess and Will sadly shook his head….

"Hey." Will suddenly said, his eyes wide as he glanced down at his watch and his face awash with confusion… "Why aren't you at work? Aren't we on air at the moment?"

Mac smiled slightly and guided Will back to his chair… "Charlie sent me here." She said grinning… "Apparently I wasn't being much use to the team – he put Jim in charge and told me to come here and see you or else!"

Will grinned and put his arm around her shoulder pulling her into his body… "Well I'm pleased to see you." Will admitted not knowing how much that simple comment pleased Mac… "I missed you…."

"Really?" Mac questioned shyly her heart suddenly thumping away in her chest.… "You seemed like you didn't want me around on Saturday?" She added feeling brave and remembering Charlie's pep talk…

"I might have been a bit of an idiot…" Will mumbled, his cheeks turning slightly red at his admission…

Mac shook her head but couldn't keep the smile from her face… "Well, I suppose you're allowed to be an idiot at the moment…" Mac joked smiling warmly at him… "Only once though – okay?! Don't be making a habit of it!"

Will chuckled as he grabbed the other chair and pulled it so it was next to the chair he had been sitting in and indicated for Mac to sit down…. "I'm sorry" he whispered honestly once they were sat… "Mac... I didn't mean to be a dick to you… Please don't even ask me to go into why?" he said shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders at the same time – his face pleading with hers for forgiveness….

Although it had been eating her away inside Mac couldn't bear to cause him any more worry at the moment so she simply smiled and nodded her head letting him know it was okay…. "I bet you haven't eaten either…" Mac said holding up a paper bag…

"Voila" she said handing him the bag…

"I recognise this bag…" Will said almost laughing… "Is this what I think it is?"

"Hmmm… depends what you think it is! It's a Reuben Special from Enrico's if you're hungry enough?" Mac said proudly, pleased with herself for getting his favourite sandwich from his favourite Deli in Manhattan…

"Hungry enough? I'm starving!" Will said grabbing the bag and tucking straight into the sandwich… "I haven't eaten anything more than a candy bar since yesterday" he mumbled hungrily…

Mac giggled at the way he devoured the sandwich… Will was always what Mac would call an elegant eater – always took his time and usually dinner or lunches would be filled with meaningful conversations and debates but not today – he seriously looked like he hadn't eaten for a month! Mac pulled off her coat and relaxed back in her chair…

"So tell me what's been happening? Lonny said he drove you to see Sophie on Sunday... How is she?"

Will nodded as he chewed his mouthful of sandwich…. "I thought I should go and see her - poor little thing… I don't think she really understands what's happening…." Will replied between mouthfuls… "Me and Susan - Jess's neighbour – sat down and tried to explain what's happening as best as we could but she's too young Kenz… she just kind of listened and then went back to playing…I think she just thinks her Mummy is away or something..."

Will took a gulp of the diet coke Mac had opened for him and carried on… "The good thing was she knew who I was straight away Mac…. I didn't think she would but when I got there she shouted 'Uncle Will'… it shocked me if I'm honest…"

It warmed Mac's heart noticing how pleased Will looked at that…

"We sat for a while and then Susan took me into Jess's place to get some things for here" Will said pointing to the photo of Sophie he had placed on Jess's bedside cabinet… "And there was a couple of photos of me and Jess out…. Made me feel kind of good about things" Will added… "You know… maybe things weren't as bad as I'd thought…"

Mac nodded in agreement…. "So is Susan keeping Sophie for now?" Mac asked…

"Yup – for the time being… She seemed nice Mac… she's got three kids of her own and said one more didn't make much difference till we get sorted here… I said I'd go back and see Soph again soon… she's so adorable Mac – you should come with me – Jess would love you to meet her – I know she would.…"

Mac was struggling to take in his words – he seemed so relaxed with her all of a sudden – so different to the Will she'd left Saturday morning and for a moment Mac wondered whether Charlie had been working some of his magic here too! Either way, Mac didn't care what caused this change - she was just thrilled it was happening...

Now there was an invitation to meet Sophie. She'd never met Sophie – hadn't even seen a picture of her until a minute ago and from the look of the photo Sophie seemed to be the spitting image of Jess. "I'd love that…" she whispered smiling again at Will…

Will nodded and they settled into a contented silence for a few minutes while he devoured the rest of his sandwich… As he finished he wiped his mouth and grinned as Mac picked up the book Will had been reading to Jess – grinning because he knew it was a favourite of hers in recent years…

"Ahhh – Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy" Mac grinned and Will knew exactly where her mind was at that moment… They'd once spent an amazing week in the Caribbean when they were first together and Will had spent most of a glorious, lazy few days reading the whole of Pride & Prejudice to Mac as they'd laid in the sunshine together…

"They may not get along at first but they get past their differences Kenz – they put it all behind them and end up happy..." Will whispered quietly with a far-away look in his eye – hoping beyond hope that she was picking up on his meaning...…

"She realises he's not such an idiot and they end up falling in love…" Mac finished, gazing at Will longingly and wishing more than anything they were back on that beach in 2006.

Reading her mind, Will reached across and placed his hand on hers… "Thanks for coming... It really is good to see you…" he whispered and squeezed her hand tightly….

For a moment Mac was so pleased she was sitting down because she was certain her legs would have given way had she been standing… She gazed across at Will and she felt her mouth go dry just at the look on Will's face but soon enough her brain snapped back into action… "Come on you…" Mac whispered "None of this heavy looks and stuff – I'm supposed to be cheering you up McAvoy!"

Mac pulled her hand away and reached into her bag winking at Will…. "Hey… I might just have a slice of Enrico's homemade Apple pie here – know anyone that likes this?" she joked pulling out another paper bag and offering it to a grinning Will…

"Mackenzie MacHale you are an absolute godsend!" Will chuckled as he reached for the pie... "What would I do without you eh?"


	5. Chapter 5

Mackenzie was awoken around two am the following morning by her phone buzzing and, in her sleepy haze, she cursed the interruption that had woken her. Sleep had been absent for most of the weekend and now she felt a little more settled with Will it had still taken her a couple of hours to doze off into a light sleep. As she reached for her phone though, she saw that the call was from Will and instantly she was awake and sat bolt upright in bed.

"Will?" she said, her heart racing a little at what could have happened as she answered the phone... When she'd left him at eleven-ish he had been in such good spirits considering all that had happened over the past few days. They had spent most of their evening together catching each other up on everything that had happened over the past forty eight hours and they had even made a date to go and see Sophie together when the little girl returned from school the next day.

"Will?" she said again down the phone but still she got not reply... "Will... are you there?"

The sound that met her next broke her heart as she heard a sob down the phone and nothing more... She heard him take a deep breath and then let it out again before more silence followed...

"Will? Please tell me what's happened – you're scaring me... Are you okay?"

"She died..."

The words were blunt and whispered so very quietly that Mac wondered for a moment whether she had actually heard them correctly or whether it was her sleepy mind playing tricks on her. He soon repeated himself though - a little louder this time... "She died Mac…. Jess…. about ten minutes ago..."

Now it was Mac's turn for silence. Tears had crept out of her eyes and she had no idea what to say... She felt as if her world had turned upside down in ten seconds flat so what must poor Will be thinking right now. She roughly wiped away the tears from her cheeks and took a gulp of water to remove the giant sized lump in her throat...

"Will. Just stay where you are okay? I'm getting in a cab and I'm coming to you right now..."

"No." Will almost shouted down the phone, followed by another sob...

"Will." Mac repeated feeling that old familiar aching in her heart. Why was his first instinct to push her away every single time?

"Mac, I'm going home in a minute... I just have to wait around for some official crap and then I'm going home..." Will said in one breath before she heard a sniff and a sigh down the phone... "I'm okay – don't worry…."

"Why don't I ring Lonny and we can come and get you?"

"There's no point.." Will mumbled into the phone... "I don't want to wait here any longer – I'm getting a cab..."

"Then I'll go to yours – I'll be there when you get home…" Mac replied straight away... "Will – I'm not letting you be on your own tonight..."

"Mackenzie please" Will shouted this time down the phone which certainly got her attention... "Look - I'm just going to go home, drink a large bourbon and sleep – honestly I am... I really don't want any company right now..."

"Will – this is me you're talking to to..." Mac urged pleadingly... "Please don't shut me out of this... let me help you..."

"Mac – I'm okay – I promise... I just need to sleep – really need to sleep... I already knew this was going to happen and so did you….You heard what the Doctor said on Friday…." Will mumbled quietly… "Please - let me sleep for a couple of hours and I'll talk to you in the morning I promise…. Look, I gotta go – there's someone waiting to speak with me."

She didn't get the chance to answer at all as the phone went silent on the other end… Mac switched on her bedside lamp and started to get dressed – whether he wanted it or not there was absolutely no way she was leaving him at home all alone at a time like this. She pulled on a pair of jeans and picked out her cosiest jumper but as she sat herself on the edge of her bed to pull on her boots she stopped to think. She put herself in his situation and thought about what the hell she would actually want to do if it was her – would she simply want to be alone as he'd said or would she want someone else there?

It was a trick her Father had always taught her when faced with a difficult situation and it never failed to help her come to a decision. Sadly, she had to admit that Will was probably right…. She realised straight away that if this was the other way around after three straight days and nights on a bedside vigil she would probably just want to go home to a comfy bed and attempt to get some sleep – try to forget everything else around her for a few short hours. The last thing she would want would be someone fussing over her keeping her awake.

Sighing Mac flopped back down against her pile of pillows and listened to the rain that was hitting the window hard. Why is it, she thought, that in awful situations when something unthinkable has happened it always seemed to be night-time and it always seemed to be raining – nothing bad ever happened on a bright sunny day. Still not knowing whether she was doing the right thing she considered ringing Charlie for a moment or two – he would always know what the right thing to do was but she soon abandoned that idea too – there was no reason to wake him in the middle of the night as well as herself.

"Arggghhhh - Will McAvoy – why do you have to be so damn frustrating?" Mac shouted to her empty bedroom before pulling off her jeans and jumper and once again slipping into the oversized t-shirt she wore to bed. Mac grabbed her phone and sent Will a text pleading with him to call her straight away if he needed absolutely anything and then told him she would be coming to his place first thing in the morning. She waited for a couple of minutes and when she didn't get any reply she almost threw her phone onto the bedside table and burrowed back down into bed pulling the covers upto her chin.

* * *

As hard as she tried to get back to sleep there was absolutely no way on earth sleep was going to come to Mackenzie for the rest of the night. After nearly an hour of tossing and turning, whatever she tried she just couldn't get her mind of Will and how he must be doing. She considered once again getting up and just going over there – she'd sit on the floor outside his front door if she must and just wait for him to open the door – at least that way she'd feel she was close by if he needed her but once again she soon pushed that idea from her mind.

Feeling somewhat frustrated Mac made her way into the kitchen and made herself a cup of tea – always the thing to calm the nerves she could hear her Mother saying in the back of her mind. Thinking of her Mum she made a mental note to call her Mother as soon as they would be awake. They had met Jess when Will and Mac had taken her over to London for a holiday a few years ago…. They'd had such a wonderful two weeks together and Mac's parents had taken to Jess as much as they had when they met Will the previous year.

Mac stood and stared out of her apartment window and watched the rain smash into the glass… With her hands wrapped around her favourite mug she couldn't get the memories of those two weeks in London out of her mind…. Something in the back of her memory bank was certain she had a photo album somewhere or did she leave it at Will's when they split? She put her cup of tea down on the coffee table and made her way over to the bookcase that lined near enough one whole wall of her apartment. She searched for a moment or two then spotted what she was looking for - way up on the top shelf was the photo album she had completely forgotten about. She dragged over the small set of steps she kept close by for the top shelf and climbed up to recover the album. God – she hadn't looked at these photos for years now – probably not since the actual week after their happy trip to London.

She plonked herself down in the corner of the sofa and wrapped the fleecy throw around her shoulders and pulled open the front cover. There on the front page were two pictures that had been her favourites out of the couple of hundred they had taken of that holiday. A tear crept out of her eye as she gazed at a complete MacHale family picture taken on her grandmothers ninetieth birthday.

There beside her was Will holding her hand, looking so handsome and so at home included in the family picture. She looked at their happy faces and thought once again how much she had let everyone down with the stupid events of 2007 and Brian bloody Brenner. She had very rarely introduced boyfriends in the past to her family but once The MacHales had met Will they had taken him to their hearts as if he was one of their own - especially her grandmother who had told Mac on that day that Will would be her lover for life. Mac remembered the happy smile on her grandmother face as she gazed at Will that day – she remembered how Granny had told her how lucky she was to find such a handsome man who obviously loved her so very much. Mac giggled at the time but soon received a gentle nudge in the ribs from the old lady - apparently she could just tell these things and she'd said that Mac would be happy with him until the day she died.

"How wrong were you Granny?" Mac whispered sadly to the picture as she let her fingers gently trace over her beloved grandmothers face – she missed her chats with her Grandmother more than she cared to admit to anyone.

The second picture, nestled just below the family picture was a picture of Will, Mac & Jess taken in the garden of her parent's house on the same day. Mac pulled it out of the album to get a closer look and instantly she felt an aching in her chest. Will was in the middle and had one arm firmly wrapped around Mac's shoulder and the other wrapped around Jess's. He looked so proud and so protective and so totally gorgeous gazing into the camera as both the girls were laughing at something or other and looking at each other. Mac sighed as she looked at the happy faces that shone back at her from the picture – honestly – she didn't think she'd ever seen a happier look on Will's face in particular. She quickly turned the picture over to see if Will had done his usual and written the actual date on the back of the photo and was stunned to see Will's handwriting scribbled across the back… Instead of the date he had written 'Mac, Thank you for the best two weeks of my life… I love you always.' across the back and signed it with his signature…

To this day Mac had absolutely no idea that he'd done that and she couldn't help the tears that spilled from her eyes at his written words. She had no idea how long she stared at the photo – just at the happy smile on Will & Jess's faces but she was suddenly bought out of her thoughts as she unexpectedly heard the softest of knocks on her front door – she looked at her watch and saw that it was only four in the morning and instantly she knew it could only be one person… She dropped the photo she was holding and literally ran to the front door.

As she pulled open the front door she kind of knew in the back of her mind that it wouldn't be a happy sight standing in front of her but she never in her wildest dreams expected Will to look so broken….

"Oh Will." She whispered as she took in the sight before her…. "I'm so sorry about Jessie…."

He valiantly attempted a smile but it turned out to be something of a grimace and then it turned into a frown…. "I didn't know where else to go" he whispered…. "I didn't feel like going home in the end…"

Mac noticed he had no coat on and was soaked to the bone – absolutely drenched from head to toe and freezing cold by the looks of things. Without saying another word she pulled the door wide open inviting him inside but he didn't move… He just stood there dripping on the door mat…

"It's okay... Come in – let's get you dried off…" Mac said but still he just looked at her…

"Will?"

"It's raining…" he whispered as he took a deep breath and sighed…

"I know." Mac replied softly… "Come on - let's get you out of those wet clothes."

"I went for a walk in the park… but… I…."

Will hesitated for a moment before he took one step towards Mac and then stopped and clenched his fists by his side, gazing sadly into Mac's eyes… "She died Mac…. My little Sister… she died…."

"I know darling…" she whispered, not even realising the term of endearment she'd used…

"She wasn't supposed to die this young…." Will whispered biting his lip... "She's got a little girl Mac… what's Sophie going to do without her Mum?"….

He looked so lost and so pitiful standing there trying so hard to be brave and not cry that it tore at her heart. She slowly reached out for his hand but before Mac knew what was happening Will flung himself into her arms gripping onto her like there was no tomorrow. She didn't hesitate and pulled him into her as tightly as she could – just as she had in his office three days ago. She pushed her arms up under his sodden sweater and gently rubbed his back – it was always such a good way to soothe him in the past and she hoped it would still be the same for him these days. After a few moments she felt his braveness crumble completely as he let out an almighty sob and cried into Mac's shoulder.

Gradually she managed to pull him through the front door still hugging him the whole time but once they were inside and Mac had kicked the door closed she gently started to untangle herself from his arms….

"Will you're soaked – we need to get you out of those wet things… you'll catch cold…"

Will nodded but still gripped onto her hands so tightly afraid to let go…. "Mac – I don't know what the hell to do…" he mumbled as he suddenly let his gaze fall to the floor….

"Right now – you don't have to do anything okay?" Mac said sounding very certain of herself… "We're going to get you changed into something dry and then try to get some sleep okay?"

"But surely there's things to be done Mac… I don't know what to do….there's registering her death… the funeral… the…."

"shhhh…" Mac interrupted him… "None of that even needs to be thought about until tomorrow okay?"

"I can't remember anything of what had to be done when Mom died… I can't remember at all…" Will whispered… "Jess did most of it…"

"Will - I'll help you in the morning okay? We'll do it all together…"

For the first time since he'd appeared at her door Will visibly relaxed a little… "You'll help?" he asked looking so lost and so childlike….

"Of course." Mac soothed…. "I'll do anything I can…. But first – we really need to get you out of all these wet clothes…."

Mac felt like she was dealing with a child as she gently pushed him towards the bathroom – he was literally doing exactly as she said. She opened the door and led him inside and pushed him down so he was sitting on the side of the bath… "Stay there" she whispered…. "I'll go find you something to change into…"

Will nodded and Mac left the bathroom returning two minutes later with a fresh towel and a very old pair of his sweat pants and an even older New York jets t-shirt of his…. She smiled as she handed them over to him… "Don't even ask why I've still got these." She giggled as he stared at them obviously confused but he didn't say a word. It was probably pretty obvious why she had kept them all these years and Will understood perfectly – at the back of one of his drawers were all sorts of things Mackenzie had left at his apartment that he just couldn't bring himself to throw away.

Mac smiled at the look of understanding Will gave her and rested her hand on his shoulder… "Come on Will… you dry yourself off and get changed and I'll make us some coco – okay?"

Will nodded but by the time she'd made it to the bathroom door he'd not moved a muscle… Mac slowly turned around and stepped towards him taking pity on him as a rain drop – or a tear – Mac wasn't sure which, made its way from his cheek and rolled off the end of his chin. She pulled a hand towel from the stand beside the sink and gently started to dry his face and hair. Luckily he was still seated so Mac could reach him easily but within a few seconds she felt his arms once again wrap around her waist pulling her closer to him.

At that moment she felt that old familiar confusion wash all over her but that didn't stop her from pulling his head so it rested against her chest and for a few brief moments she didn't care of the consequences – she gently ran her fingers through his hair pushing it back into place and then dropped the softest of kisses to the top of his head and she swore that she felt him physically relax in her arms.

A couple of minutes later as she actually felt him shiver as she pulled away slightly…. "Will… come on – get changed for me yes? You really don't want me to do it for you do you?" she giggled, before taking his hand and squeezing it tightly… "I'll be in the kitchen okay?"….

Trying to control her emotions and the burning urge she had to go back and take him into her arms once again Mac left the bathroom and made her way through her apartment and into the kitchen praying that he'd get himself dried and changed whilst she was gone. She knew they had stepped over the boundaries of friendship yet again and probably would more in the next few hours but undressing him was something that she really didn't think would do either of them much good at the moment.

When Will hadn't made it into the kitchen by the time she had made the coco Mac was starting to worry… She picked up the mugs and went into the lounge area only to find Will sat on the sofa staring at the photo that Mac had dropped on the floor when he'd knocked at the door. Mac sighed at her stupidity once again – the last thing he needed to see was a photo of the three of them staring back at him….

"Will… I'm sorry…"

He looked up and actually smiled at her as she made her way over to the sofa… At least he had gotten changed Mac thought to herself as she put the coco's down next to her un-drunken tea from half an hour ago…

"I'd forgotten about these photos…" Will whispered and Mac once again noticed a slight smile on his face as he started to flick through the album…

"I had too until about an hour ago…" she replied, and picked up the fleece throw she'd used earlier and wrapped it around his shoulders.

For the next twenty minutes they had a lovely time under the circumstances, looking at the photos and recalling memories from much happier times. Mac was thrilled to hear Will even chuckle a couple of times as they'd recalled her Grandmother trying to make a speech on her birthday after way too much sherry! As she took the last sip of her coco she saw him stifle a yawn and she knew she had to try to get him to sleep – even if it was just for a couple of hours.

"Hey…" she whispered as she placed her mug onto the table…. "You need to try and sleep for a bit Mr… why don't you take the bed and I'll nap on here…. I've already slept a few hours tonight…"

Will nodded but then reached for her hand and squeezed it so tightly…. The temporary happiness and laughter the photos had brought them was suddenly forgotten and Will instantly looked scared – just at the thought of sleeping. He pulled her hand up to his lips and gently brushed his lips across her knuckles letting his mouth rest there afterwards…. A moment later he looked up and gazed into her eyes…. "Kenz… Just for tonight – please don't leave me alone…I couldn't bear it…" and she winced at how despondent he sounded right now.

Mackenzie blocked all rational thoughts from her head at that moment and refused to let sense or reason mutter a word in her mind. She slowly stood and took him by the hand and together they walked towards her bedroom switching out the lights in the lounge and kitchen as they went.

Once they reached the bedroom, Will watched as Mac climbed back into the bed she left a couple of hours ago and then pulled back the covers for him to join her which he did in a flash. He had always told her in the past how safe and contented he felt spooned up behind her and instantly their bodies remembered their old sleeping habits and they were soon cuddled together as one.

Without uttering a word, Mackenzie leant over and turned out the bedside lamp and the room was thrown into total darkness. A few seconds later she felt his lips press a soft kiss into her hair and then he sighed…. "I don't know how I'd get through this without you Mackenzie…" he whispered sadly….

"You don't have to Billy…" she replied straight away and she truly meant it…. "I'll be here…. Always…"

And with that she felt him nuzzle into her neck and squeeze her waist tightly before she felt him relax a little. She closed her eyes and waited until she heard that soft familiar breathing of his that meant he was asleep. It took her another hour or so for her to join him in sleep but for once she just relaxed and enjoyed the feeling of being in his arms again. She knew the peace and tranquillity of this moment wasn't going to last for too much longer once they awoke in the morning so for now she would give and take comfort while she could.


	6. Chapter 6

Mackenzie awoke a few hours later and for the first time in nearly five years she couldn't help but smile the moment her eyes fluttered opened. Will was still completely wrapped around her, their legs so entwined that, if it weren't for the sweat pants Will was still wearing, you truly wouldn't be able to tell where one body started and the other finished. For a few minutes she laid completely still listening to the sound of his gentle breathing in her ear. Part of her wanted to stay here in his arms until he woke too but she had a feeling things would get more than a little awkward if he opened his eyes to find them wrapped so tightly together and he certainly didn't need any extra hassle right now. No - it was definitely better for her to get up now and save any embarrassment and awkwardness and besides, she wanted to make a few calls before he got up - she really needed to try and sort out as much as she could for him - anything to ease the strain he would feel over the next few days.

Extremely carefully and extremely quietly Mac managed to untangle herself from his body and make it out of the bed without him even stirring! She'd once been a master of extracting herself from his sleeping form and she was secretly quite pleased she hadn't lost the knack over the years apart. She picked up both her phone and his so he wouldn't be disturbed and padded out of the bedroom shutting the door quietly as she went.

By the time Will appeared in her kitchen at half past eleven Mac had managed to wash and dry his abandoned clothes from the night before, she had showered and dressed herself and had managed to make a quick visit to the grocery store to get everything they'd need for breakfast. After that, she'd rung Charlie and explained to him all that had happened, she followed that up with a call to Jim telling him that both Will and her would be off until at least the end of the week and lastly she'd rung Jess's neighbour Susan to tell her the sad news of Jess's death and to check on Sophie.

"Morning." Will mumbled, sleepily rubbing his eyes in that adorable way Mackenzie had forgotten about...

Mac looked up and whispered a quick good morning back as she filled a mug with coffee and pressed it into his hands...

"I can't believe how late it is" Will said as he immediately sipped the hot liquid... "I don't think I've slept this late since college!"

"You must have needed it… You feeling okay?"

"I guess." He said pulling out a stool next to Mac and climbing up onto the stool, automatically looking over her shoulder at the crossword she was doing… "Need any help?"

"No thank you 'Mr I can finish the crossword in two minutes flat'!" Mac joked, remembering their many a morning banter sessions over the paper and the crossword in particular…. "I've warned you in the past about finishing my crossword for me McAvoy…"

Will chuckled and pulled the financial section of the paper out… "I'm sure you won't be reading this."

Mac smiled and nudged his shoulder playfully… "Oi! Cheeky! Want some breakfast?"

Will took a deep breath and let it out again seemingly finding that question too hard to answer…

"Okay." Mac said climbing off her stool and opening the fridge door wide… "You're eating whether you want to or not so don't try and tell me you're not hungry…. We have a choice of eggs, bacon, croissants, cereal, fruit or everything needed for a pancake making session…. Your choice - whatever you fancy."

From his position on the stool Will looked inside the fridge and was mightily impressed – Mac's fridge before had always resembled Old Mother Hubbard's cupboard – as in always a bit bare! "Eggs sound good… and some toast maybe?"

"Then eggs it shall be with maybe a couple of rashers of bacon to keep us going!" Mac replied trying her best to keep the atmosphere light for him…. She pulled everything she needed out of the fridge and set about her task of preparing breakfast for them both. Will watched, almost in shock, as she pottered around for the next few minutes grilling the bacon and getting the pans ready for the eggs. After she put the toast on Mac wandered over to the coffee maker and picked up the jug and as she filled up both their mugs she noticed the stare from Will…

"What?" she asked, pouring coffee into his mug…

"What have you done with the old Mackenzie? The one that couldn't even make toast?"

Mac laughed and headed back to finishing the eggs… "Well… maybe I needed to grow up a bit!" she replied and she was half serious although her tone was obviously joking… "Here was me giving out this impression of a strong independent woman, a hard hitting, award winning journalist and I couldn't even feed myself at home! Bit pathetic eh?"

"I don't know – I always found it a rather endearing…."

Mac giggled and shook her head… "Besides…. I went camping in the desert for nearly two years remember? You have to learn to look after yourself a bit there!"

Mac slid the eggs she had been cooking onto a plate, collected the toast, added a few rashers of bacon and passed the plate over to Will…

"Enjoy!"

"Thanks" he muttered as he hopped off the stall and made his way over to the cutlery drawer pulling out a set for both of them….. "Well, I'm impressed… I think this is the first time ever that you've cooked breakfast for me! I like the grown up Mackenzie!"

Mac caught his gaze as he handed her a knife and fork and for a moment she held it with his words jumping around her brain. 'Grown Up Mackenzie'. She had a sudden urge to tell him she'd grown up in lots of ways since they'd split – she was grown up enough to be in a proper relationship now – that's what she wanted to tell him but of course the time was absolutely not right at the moment. When they were together she had always been so scared of how quick their relationship had moved along, how completely and utterly she'd fallen head over feet for him and six years ago she simply couldn't handle it.

Although she'd had a privileged upbringing full of love from her family she still couldn't get used to the complete and unconditional love Will had shown for her since their very first date…. He'd treated her like a princess and had her so high up on a pedestal that Mac simply hadn't been able to hack it. She'd spent so many nights in the Middle East lying awake wondering if that was the reason she'd gone back to Brian so easily and to this day she could never come up with the answer to that question – she doubted she ever would find an answer. The one thing she did know now was that she'd be able to cope now – without question… she'd do anything to get that love back from Will – to once again get him to look at her now how he used to six years ago.

"Hey… how can you not even get seven across.?" Will asked looking up from the crossword and dragging her out of her thoughts.… "Come on Kenz – eight letters - Device controlling amount of light admitted…. It's simple.." he said as he stuffed a mouthful of eggs in his mouth and grabbed the pen….. "Aperture…" he said looking up at her and smiling cheekily as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.…

He couldn't help himself when there was a crossword around! Mac laughed and dragged her plate across the table until she was sat up on the stool and together they ignored everything else in their world for the next half an hour apart from the breakfast and the crossword puzzles.

When they had finally finished breakfast Mac gathered up the plates and loaded the dishwasher while Will carried on flicking through the newspaper… This last forty minutes had been a little surreal if Mac was honest… Jess hadn't been mentioned, going to bed spooned up together hadn't been mentioned – in-fact, nothing from the past three days had been mentioned and Mac was starting to get a little concerned at how easily he was pretending nothing had happened. Somehow she had to pull him back into reality and get going - they had a ton of stuff to do…

"Right." Mac said authoritatively…. "Here's your clothes Mr - washed and dried and even ironed… why don't you head to the shower and then we need to get going."

In an instant that look of uneasiness and trepidation was back on Will's face…. "Can't we just stay here today…" Will asked… "We can watch old movies all day and look through the old photos again…"

"Will – you know we can't do that this morning…. Come on – we have to go to the hospital and get Jess's death registered…. I'll help you Will but you have to come along too…."

Will nodded with such a look of dismay on his face that Mac felt like crying… "We can come back after if you want… We can watch a movie this evening…" she whispered smiling at him…. "Mind you, I can't say my cooking skills have improved enough to produce a full blown dinner – it might have to be Chinese take-out."

Will didn't say anything – he just slid off the stool and nodded again – as if accepting his fate… Mackenzie led him to the bathroom and fished out a towel for him… "I'll call Lonny okay? We'll head over and get all this official stuff done this morning…. Then go and see Sophie after school?"

That put a smile on Will's face and he grabbed her arm as she left the bathroom… "Thanks for everything Mac…" he said as he leaned in and pressed the softest of kisses on her cheek… "I really do mean it."

Mac smiled and made her way out of the bathroom into her bedroom. She sat on the bed and let her fingers touch the spot on her cheek where he'd kissed her… This was killing her – this closeness but all under the wrong circumstances… She shook her head and cursed their rotten timing once again….

* * *

The next few hours were horrendous and even Mac felt like giving up on all of this and heading back to the safety of either the office or her apartment. They had though, managed to get through all the official business that needed to be done. They'd collected the death certificate, registered the death and also appointed a funeral director but through-out the whole ordeal Will hadn't once let go of Mackenzie's hand – not even when it came to signing the official papers – he'd signed them one handed with his right hand but kept his left well and truly wrapped around Mackenzie's as if her hand could protect him from anything the world wanted to throw at him.

If she was honest, Mac wasn't too sure just how much information Will was taking in… An intelligent man he most certainly was with the ability to remember tons of information but Mac was convinced he had just completely switched off and was going through the motions this afternoon just doing exactly whatever she told him to do.

They pulled up outside Jess's house and for a moment Will didn't move… Mac gently laid her hand on his arm and managed to get his attention… "You ready?"

Will looked up at the house as if Jess would appear at the front door any moment and inside Mac felt a churning in her stomach just from the sadness etched on his face… She climbed out of the SUV and smiled at Lonny - the man really had been a god send today – his actions had been way above the call of duty recently and Mac made a mental note to remind Will to thank him properly at some point when he was feeling better.

She made her way around the car and met Will as he stepped out of the car… She noticed him take a deep breath and sigh and automatically he reached for her hand as Susan appeared from next door.

"God – I can't do this Mac…" Will suddenly whispered as Susan made her way down the path… "How am I supposed to tell Sophie what's happened?"

Mac panicked for a moment when she saw the look of absolute terror in his eyes… She squeezed his hand gently and caught his attention… "You can Will – you hear me? You're stronger than you think… If you're scared just pretend there's a camera pointed at you and go into Anchor mode…. Will McAvoy the News Anchor can get through anything – you understand?... Just hold it together for Sophie now and we'll deal with everything else afterwards okay?"

Will held her gaze for a few seconds, obviously thinking about what she had said and then nodded squeezing her hand tightly….

"I'm here for you okay?" Mac whispered as Susan approached them doing her best to smile….

Will was right when he'd said that she seemed a lovely woman… Mac watched as she said hello to Will and hugged him before looking at Mac and smiling… Mac waited for a moment for Will to introduce them but his attention had been caught by the most gorgeous little girl Mac had ever seen standing at the door of Susan's house. She turned her attention to Susan as Will locked eyes with Sophie – a smile instantly coming to his face…

"Hi, I'm Mackenzie MacHale." Mac finally said, holding out her hand to Susan… "We spoke on the phone this morning?"

"I'm Susan…. Will's told me all about you." Susan replied as Mac felt Will pull his hand from hers…

"Soph." he whispered as he almost ran towards the little blonde haired girl….

Mac watched in delight as he scooped up Sophie into his arms and held onto her so tightly burying his head into the side of her neck – she was sure Sophie had absolutely no idea why her Uncle was hugging her so tightly but she didn't seem to mind as she hugged back just as tightly. For a moment all Mac could see was him as a Father – a Father he'd never gotten to be because of her stupid actions….. Would they be parents by now Mac wondered? Would they have a little girl like Sophie or maybe a little boy who was the spitting image of Will? Or maybe even one of each by now? She'd been thinking about that so much lately when she was alone at nights and drowning her sorrows in a bottle of wine.

"She's gorgeous" Mac whispered feeling a tear come to her eye as Sophie wrapped her arms around Will's neck and gently played with his hair at the back, smiling as if she didn't have a trouble in the world. Maybe through this awful accident something good could happen after all for Will – he seemed to have fallen for Sophie already….

"She's been asking about Jess a lot today…" Susan said quietly….

Mac nodded and took another look at the little girl as she planted a sloppy kiss on Will's cheek and then laughed – her world was about to be turned upside down and for what felt like the thousandth time already today Mac's heart ached for both Will and Sophie.

"We're going to tell her today…" Mac whispered… "But god only knows how he'll get through it…" she added as they strolled towards the house….

Will noticed them approaching and pulled Sophie around until she was balanced on his hip, her arms loosely hung around Will's neck still…. "Hey Soph – I want you to meet a special friend of mine…. this is Mackenzie…"

"Kenzie?" Sophie questioned not quite getting Mac's name right…

"I know… it's a big name…. I call her Mac - it's easier..…" Will replied making all three of the adults laugh….

"I like Kenzie better" Sophie answered quietly, struggling with the name again… Mac watched as the little girl smiled sweetly at her before ducking her head shyly into Will's neck….

"Hello Sophie." Mac said, gently laying her hand on Sophie's arm which made the little girl smile again… "Hey – don't listen to Uncle Will… I like how you say my name… Kenzie's great…"

"You gonna say Hi?" Will asked, pressing a kiss to the side of Sophie's head…

"Hi…." came a tiny whisper from the side of Will's face before she buried her head back into her Uncle's neck….

"I have no idea why she's turned shy on us…" Will chuckled as he tickled Sophie making her giggle – a sound that was like music to Will & Mac's ears… "This little chatterbox has usually got way too much to say to be shy…"

For a moment all thoughts of how awful this situation was disappeared as Sophie giggled over and over again as Will continued tickling her tummy showing no mercy. Will winked at Mac as he noticed the smile appear on Mac's face as she watched the two of them...

"Coffee?" Susan asked as her own children appeared at the front door wondering what was going on…

"Would love one…" Mackenzie answered and together they made their way inside Susan's home.

Will chuckled to himself a minute or two later as he noticed how quickly Sophie had taken to Mac. They'd only been in the room for two minutes and already Sophie had introduced Mac to every one of her dollies telling Mac exactly how old they were and what their names were before she grabbed a jigsaw and announced she needed help…

Mac looked up at Will briefly to see a far-away look in his eye – she knew he needed to be distracted for the time being and Sophie was the perfect distraction right now…. "You know what? Your Uncle Will is the best at jigsaws…." Mac told Sophie…. "I'm not very good at all…"

Sophie seemed to accept that and quickly carried the box over to Will who was delighted to have something to take his mind off things…. "Come on Soph – let's show Mac how easy this is…" Will muttered which made the little girl giggle again…

Mac was surprised at just how natural Will was with Sophie as he picked up the box and sat on the floor with her and together they started to piece the jigsaw together both chatting happily to each other - totally oblivious of everything going on around them – apart from which colour dress the Disney princesses were wearing in the jigsaw of course – a matter of great importance to Sophie, and surprisingly Will, right now.

As she watched the two of them she wondered just how they were going to get through the next couple of hours - there was so much to tell Sophie - how do you sit a four year old girl down and tell her that her mother had died and then after that there was the matter of what was to happen with Sophie? Well that just didn't bear thinking about as far as Mac was concerned but sometime soon they had to think about it – they couldn't leave her here forever with Susan.

"How's he doing?" Susan asked a moment later as she sat down on the sofa next to Mac and handed her a coffee – she seemed to have realised that Will wasn't really in the right frame of mind to discuss much…

"He's okay – when I distract him enough not to think too much." Mac replied… "But absolutely petrified most of the time…"

Susan smiled as if she understood but then a slight frown came onto her face….

"Have you got a moment?" she asked Mac quietly and nodded her head indicating for Mac to follow her out of the room. Will looked up as Mac followed Susan but she gently placed a hand on his shoulder as she passed him and he seemed to understand that she'd be back in a moment.

"Can I talk to you about Soph?" Susan asked once they were both in the tiny kitchen of Susan's house…. "I've tried to talk to Will on Saturday but he just seemed to tune out and change the subject…"

"He doesn't know what to do about anything right now…." Mac said feeling like she needed to somehow defend Will…

"Mac – I really don't mind Sophie being here - she can stay here as long as is needed but Jess & I became quite close over the past five years…. and well… I should tell you that a couple of years ago that she made a will. She told me at the time because she wanted someone to know should anything happen to her or Sophie…." Susan said, a tear falling from her eye onto her pale cheeks…

"I tried to tell Will the other day that Jess has a file next door – she showed me where it was… I think maybe Will should take a look at it… or maybe you can if Will doesn't feel up to it….."

Mac hesitated for a moment – not quite knowing what to say and wondering what Susan was trying to tell her… Mainly, she was surprised Jess had even made a will – she was never the most organised of people but maybe motherhood had smartened her up a bit Mac thought…

"Do you know what the will says?" Mac asked…

"Yes and No. I've not seen it in detail…. But… Jess did tell me what she wanted to happen with Sophie should anything happen to her – that's written in the will also I believe…."

"What's to happen with Soph?" Mac asked, pleased in the back of her mind that Will wouldn't have to make a decision on that….

Susan took a deep breath to speak just as Will appeared in the doorway stopping both women in their tracks…

"Hey…" he mumbled looking from Mackenzie to Susan… "What's going on out here?"

Mac smiled and tried to change the subject but as fragile as Will was feeling she wasn't able to get one over on him…

"Come on…. I heard what you were saying…" Will said, sounding more confident than he had done in days… "Jess has made a will?"

Susan nodded…. "There's a file next door…"

"And you said something was to happen with Sophie?" Will asked…

"Maybe it would be better for you to read it yourself…" Susan said, looking more anxious by the second… "It's all written in there I believe…"

"I will read it… but tell me what you were about to tell Mac…"

Susan hesitated for a moment and stole a look at Mac who nodded as if to tell her to go ahead…

"She wanted Sophie to live with you Will - should anything ever happen to her. Jess wanted you to be Sophie's legal guardian."

* * *

_**A/N - Thanks very much for those reviewing... I really do hope you're still enjoying this... :)**_

_**Happy New Year to you all! At least we're in the same year now as Season 2 - five odd months and counting!**_

_**x**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's the next bit... Frightened Will & a pep talk from Mac!**

**Hope you enjoy this & let me know that you think... :)**

* * *

Mac felt her breath get caught in the back of her throat as she watched the colour drain completely from Will's face….

"Guardian?" he repeated slowly as if he'd just misheard what Susan had said…. "Me?"

Susan nodded her head whilst attempting a smile but Will didn't respond – in fact nobody said anything for what seemed like an eternity…

"What about the Father?" Will finally muttered…. "Surely he's the one to take Soph?"

Mac looked up hardly believing what Will had said…. "Jesus Will - You would really want Sophie to go to him? After everything you've told me about him?"

Will didn't answer – he couldn't – he knew Mac was right there…

"Jess hasn't seen him since he left..." Susan replied trying to ignore the glare Mackenzie was throwing Will…

"But still… legally…. He's entitled to custody…." Will said quietly….

Susan looked at Mac and then turned her attention back to Will… "Jess declared the Father as unknown on the birth certificate…. She didn't want him to have anything to do with Sophie…"

"Jesus Christ…." Will whispered, somehow feeling responsible for this…. "I didn't think she even listened to me back then…." Will mumbled sadly, shaking his head to try to ease the panic that seemed to be spreading over his entire body.….

Will stared at the ground and Mac noticed he was starting to shake all over…. She took a few steps towards him and gently placed her hand on his arm… "Billy…. It's okay….."

Will didn't say a word – he could hardly even look at her as his hands began to shake under her touch…

"Will?" Mac asked, as she saw his eyes switch from confusion to pure terror…. "Will?"… she repeated but he had already turned to go. With his long strides it didn't take him long to make it to the front door but Mac soon caught him up… "Will… wait.."

Will stopped for a moment as Mac laid her hand on his shoulder but as he turned around she could see the look of fear in his eyes… "I can't do this Mac…" he said, his voice shaking as he spoke…

"Shhh…. It'll be okay…" Mac said, desperately trying to calm him down before he flipped…

"Okay?" Will repeated his eyes wide… "Okay? How the hell will it be okay?"

"I don't know right now but calm down Will…"

"You can't just say calm down like I'm getting wound up over a news issue in the pitch meeting…" Will said, his voice raised loud enough for Susan to hear from the kitchen… "For Christ's sake Mac – did you just hear what she said?"

"Of course I did but all I'm saying is don't lose it completely without thinking about it or talking about it…"

"That's easy for you to say Mackenzie – this isn't you we're talking about here. You haven't got to become a parent out of nowhere… How is this okay?" Will shouted as he walked out the door slamming it hard behind him…

Mac closed her eyes feeling the emotions start to well up inside of her and bit her lip hard to stop the tears that were already formed and waiting to fall. As hard as this was on Will, Mac was starting to wonder just how much more of this she could cope with… She wanted to help him more than anything but maybe she just wasn't cut out for this with the current state of their relationship. It was becoming harder and harder to deal not only with the reality of Jess dying but the stir of emotions it was creating between herself and Will. One minute there was anger, the next affection, the next pity, the next tears and all of that wrapped up in the ever increasing feelings of unrequited love that Mac usually did so very well to hide from him.

With her hand still on the front door handle Mac let her forehead rest against the door… Just as she was wondering what to do next she felt a small tug on her jumper – when she looked down she saw the most adorable set of blue eyes gazing up at her… God – what was it about those McAvoy eyes that melted Mac so easily?

"Soph." Mac whispered, her heart aching under the gaze of the little girl…. "You okay sweetie?" she said as she crouched down to Sophie's height…

Sophie looked down at the floor before looking up again at Mac… "Is Uncle Will cross?" she asked in her tiny high pitched voice, the sparkle she'd had in her eyes when she was playing jigsaws with Will was most definitely gone…

"Oh darling… no…" Mac replied, fixing a smile to her face and trying her best to sound cheerful…

Mac backed up a little and perched herself on the second bottom step of the stairs and pulled Sophie with her…. "Uncle Will's not cross sweetheart…" she whispered brushing the fringe out of Sophie's eyes… "He's just gone outside for some fresh air…."

"Why was he shouting at you if he's not cross?" Sophie asked so innocently… "My Mummy only shouts when she's cross…"

How could Mac answer that she thought to herself…. Mac pulled Sophie to her side so she was sat on the stair next to her… "Uncle Will's just upset at the moment darling…. Don't worry - he's not cross with you or me or anyone…"

"He looks sad…." Sophie said, her little eyes suddenly looking tearful… "I don't want Uncle Will to be sad…"

Mac stole a look down at Sophie as the little girl laid her hand on Mackenzie's knee – Mac could tell from the look in her eyes that she was trying to process all this. What must she be going through right now? Her mother had been taken away from her which surely she couldn't understand, she was stuck living next door with a lady she obviously knew well but wasn't her Mother and then she gets her Uncle (who she rarely sees) turn up with a stranger but yet still she smiles and plays and carries on with her little life – not moaning, not crying – just wanting her Uncle to be happy…

Mac was bought out of her daydreams a moment later as Sophie stood up, fixing a big smile on her face to replace her sad frown of moments earlier… "I'm going to draw Uncle Will a picture – that will make him smile Kenzie…."

Mac giggled as Sophie struggled again to say 'Mackenzie' (she had a feeling Kenzie was going to stick) and then she took hold of her hand giving it a gentle squeeze…. "I think that sounds like a lovely idea darling…. Uncle Will would like that…"

"Do you want to help me draw it?" Sophie asked Mac, her face so serious and so hopeful…

"Maybe next time okay? I'm gonna go outside and talk to Uncle Will while you do your picture and then…. How about we go out for a pizza? You, Me and Uncle Will?"

The smile that spread across Sophie's face told Mac just what a good idea that was…. "Yeah…" Sophie squealed and flung herself into Mac's arms for a two second cuddle before running off at full speed back into the lounge.

Mackenzie sat for a moment trying to formulate a plan but whatever she came up with really wasn't going to wash with Will right now and really – in her heart of hearts – she couldn't blame him. If someone suddenly told her she was the legal guardian of a four, nearly five, year old girl she knew she'd more than likely react exactly the same way Will had. Mac stood and pulled on her coat and grabbed Will's off the hook…. Hearing a sigh, she looked behind her to see Susan standing at the kitchen door…

"I'm sorry." Susan said miserably… "He must be shocked but I thought you should know as soon as possible…"

"Please – don't be sorry…. I should have thought of this.." Mac admitted, annoyed with herself for not even thinking this could have been a possibility…

"If there's anything I can do to help?"

"Really – you've done so much already…." Mac answered before heading to the door… "I'm going to go and see if I can calm him down a little – sometimes he just needs to talk to get things straight in his head…. Don't worry - he'll be okay with it."

Mac pulled her coat around her and stepped outside looking for Will out the front – she was starting to wish they had stayed in the safety of her apartment now – the old movies Will had suggested a few hours ago seemed like much the better option right now…

"Will." She called looking down the side alley to the house but she heard nothing… She noticed Lonny leaning against the SUV and he nodded his head towards the front porch of Jess's house next door…

Mac smiled sweetly at Lonny, nodding her head and made her way across the front garden…

"Mac… I'm sorry…" Will said before Mac even had a chance to say a word… "I know you're only helping and I'm being a dick as always…"

"You're allowed at the moment – you're not exactly thinking straight… " Mac replied, holding his coat open so he could slip his arms into the jacket… Mac pulled the jacket onto his shoulders and plonked herself down next to him on the bench… They sat in silence for a few moments before Will let out a heavy sigh…

"What's going through that head of yours?" Mac asked straight… "And tell me the truth Billy…"

Will looked across at Mac and sighed again – she always did read him too well for his liking – he could never hide anything from this woman…. "Honestly? I'm scared Kenz… I'm scared and I don't know what the fuck to do right now – about anything?"

"I know" Mac sighed..… "I'm sure it's only natural to be scared right now….. and I am too if that helps… but…. right now – you and me are the grown up's here – we can't be scared… we have to make this okay for Sophie – she has to be first priority you know that…."

Will dropped his head into his hands and didn't move for a while – it wasn't lost on him just how much of a rock Mackenzie was being right now – she was literally putting herself in the same boat as him throughout this ordeal and once again he wondered just how much of a mess he'd be without her by his side at the moment…..

"You really think Sophie should go to her Father?" Mac asked a moment or two later….

"No of course not… I was shocked….." Will replied…. "Also, I'm just saying – legally – he has the right whether you or I like it or not…"

Mac sighed and joined him in a few more moments of silence… Will knew he was probably coming across like an idiot here but he literally had no idea how to handle this and the more he thought about it the more frightened he became…. After a while he looked up at Mac, his face pale and scared… "Where do I start Mac? I can't be a Father.."

"I don't believe that…." Mac said so quietly… "I think you would be an amazing Father and from what I've seen already you're great with her…"

"That's different… I can sit on a floor and do a jigsaw with her – that's easy…. I can't bring her up… How does it all work? How can I be a Father to my sister's kid?"

"The same way you would be if she was your own kid…. Will – you'd be a fantastic Father… You've done it before even – you were a Father figure to all your siblings growing up Will – you did it without even knowing…"

"I don't know…" he said, shaking his head…. "I don't know what to do now – I can't see I'd know what to do in three years' time or five years' time…."

"Don't they say parenting is half making it up as it goes along?" Mac joked but Will didn't even crack a smile at that comment.

They sat for a moment – both deep in thought…. Mac had something she wanted to say but she was terrified to actually say it because it meant she'd be dragging up a conversation they'd had one night when they were together but that was a conversation between two lovers about future plans and not two friends…

"What?" Will said, not once taking his eyes off her….

Mac hesitated for a moment really not sure she should go on… "It doesn't matter…." She said quietly looking straight ahead of her…

"What were you going to say Mac?" Will persisted…. "I need all the damn help I can get here…"

"Okay…. Look, I don't want to drag up the past Will and upset you even more… but… you always wanted kids – you had such grand ideas of how things would happen… you remember that night? That New Year's Eve when we were in Paris? What we spoke about for nearly two hours?"

Will nodded, knowing exactly the conversation she meant…. He had poured his heart out to her after a few glasses of champagne telling her all the future plans he had for the two of them, all the dreams he had of having children with her – he'd even had their names and schooling planned…

"Will, you had it so mapped out – I can remember every bit clearly and I know you can… Well…. now you just put those plans into action for Sophie…."

Will was listening to her intently but all the time shaking his head….

"What?" Mac asked? "Why are you shaking your head?"

"It's different." he said simply….

Will reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a cigarette…. For once, he didn't care if it upset Mac him smoking – he needed something to calm him down. He lit his cigarette and took a long drag….

Mac left it for a moment before she started again…. "How's it different?"

"It is… that's all…" Will said, the volume of his voice dropping word by word…

"That's a rubbish answer Will… Sophie's four? Nearly five…. Those plans - you can do it with Soph…"

Will took a moment to take in the hopeful look on Mac's face – she didn't get it – she simply just didn't get it… "It's different because those were plans for our kids Mackenzie… You and me… I only ever wanted that with you – I only ever wanted kids with you don't you see? If you'd been there then we would have done that together Mac – it wouldn't be scary if we were parents together - if you were their Mom…. It's different because I never wanted to be a single parent or do this with anyone else? I never wanted anyone else to be Mom to my kids… Only you…"

Mac swallowed hard at the brutal honesty of his words…. She'd asked him to be truthful with her and he certainly was being. She didn't say anything for a moment but she couldn't take her eyes off him. Without even realising what she was doing she grabbed the cigarette from Will's hand and took a long drag which most definitely broke the awkward silence that had settled quickly on the two of them…

"Hey…" Will said in shock…. "When did you start smoking?"

"Two seconds ago…" Mac replied straight back at him…

Will chuckled and nudged her shoulder… "Well don't – it's bad for you." He said in a perfect British accent mocking the way she had said the phrase to him many, many times….

Mac pulled her coat around her to keep out the late winter chill…. "Look Will – I know it's scary and I know you can't even begin to take this all in right now but truly – what other choice is there? You can't say No to this? It's not as if there's some other choice…."

"Why me?" Will whispered, his voice cracking slightly… "I don't mean to sound like an ungrateful dick or anything but why me?"

"Because you're the best big brother in the world that's why and Jess knew that. Seriously Will, what other option did Jess have when she made the will? I'd have done the same if I were in her shoes and so would you if it was all the other way around…."

Will shook his head before reaching timidly for Mac's hand and holding it tightly… "Why didn't she ever come to me and say anything about this to me?"

"I don't know…" Mac whispered as she stared down at their hands joined together once more…. "She probably thought it would never happen – you make these sort of decisions never thinking you'd need to actually see it through…"

"Mac, I don't even know where to start…. Do I stop work completely? Do I move out here? Move Sophie to New York..? There's so much in my head right now that I can't even think of one thing straight right now…."

"So don't think right now… There's plenty of time…. Charlie's not going to be pushing you to get back to work - take a few weeks leave and we'll figure it out."

"I feel like my brain is going to explode…"

"Hey come on.." Mac said, sensing he was maybe starting to come around to the idea… "I know it's a life changing thing… but you can do this with help… Remember you don't have to do any of this on your own… I don't know all the answers right now Billy but we can sit down and fathom this out between us… We can work around it somehow… she can come to the studio sometimes or you can hire a Nanny to look after her while you're working because I tell you something - I'm not letting you leave work Mr so don't even think about that idea… There's ways to make this work…."

Will's heart that moment was melting with love and appreciation for her right now and he couldn't help himself but pull her gently into his arms, once again feeling the strength and safeness her arms offered him…. When they pulled apart a moment later he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear…. "You really think I can do this?"

"You can do anything you set your mind to Will... you have courage and you have a giant heart – the biggest heart I know in a man…. All it is… is… well, it's just a case of figuring it all out - learning how to start… once you get going – it'll be fine…"

"I'm trying to believe what you're saying and keep positive Mac – I swear I am… but that all sounds easier said than done…"

Mac smiled and leant her head on his shoulder… "You know what my Dad used to tell me when I was little? When I was stuck on some piece of homework or when I didn't know how to do some mammoth project at school?"

Will looked at her and noticed the tender look on her face that always appeared when she spoke about her Father…

"What?"

"Well, he'd always ask the same question…. He'd say "Mackenzie, how do you eat an elephant?""

Will chuckled – this was only something Mackenzie could come up with at a moment like this… "Eat an elephant? God – this sounds like a Mackenzie saying not your Fathers…"

"Well it is these days but it's from him originally… He used to say me 'Mackenzie, you eat an elephant in very small pieces – one mouthful at a time...'and before you laugh or think I'm crazier than normal it's true Will… It's a mammoth task – the thought of taking on a four year old girl and bringing her up but you can do it… just take it one step at a time and you'll work it out…."

"I don't know." Will mumbled…

"I have faith in you Will… even if you don't have it in yourself…"

Will smiled and looked down at the beautiful look of blind faith on her face – it inspired him at times like this… "You do?"

"Always." Mac answered simply… "Always have had and always will have."

They sat there together in silence for the next five minutes or so while Will smoked another cigarette and both were lost in a world of their own thoughts…. Mac was making a list in her head of how things should go for the rest of the day and just exactly what Will's options were….

"I told Soph we'd take her for a pizza…" Mac said quietly as Will stubbed out his cigarette… "Sound okay?"

Will nodded and took a deep breath…. "When should I tell her about Jess? After pizza?"

Mac nodded…. "I think that sounds like a good idea… maybe we'll go for a play in the park or something? It might be better outside…."

"Sounds like a plan…." Will mumbled as he stole a look at Mackenzie… "Will you stay with me… help me?"

His voice was so hopeful and so tender that Mac couldn't say no…. "Of course." She whispered…. "For as long as you need…."

Will squeezed her hands and softly muttered "Thanks."

"Hey… I was thinking." Mac said…. "Why don't we stay down here tonight? Soph can sleep in her own bed that way…. She can go to school if she wants tomorrow or we can keep her off – whatever she feels like in the morning?... We can make some plans for tomorrow while she's sleeping….. What do you think?"

Will smiled and took Mac's other hand so he was holding onto both of them… "I think you're a blessing on me Mac…. I really don't know what I'd do without you the past few days - I'm terrified when you're not with me…."

"It's okay Will…. I'm not going anywhere…."

"Saying Thank you doesn't seem anywhere near enough but I'm so grateful Kenz – more than you will ever know."

The look on his face was melting Mac more and more by the second…. She didn't even want to consider all the thoughts that were going through her head right now about how close the two of them were becoming and how that couldn't and shouldn't happen in this situation….

"What are friends for if not to help out in your hour of need?" Mac whispered quietly, standing and taking his hand before he could say anything more…. "Come on – there's a little girl next door looking forward to a Pizza with her Uncle…"

Will nodded and slung his arm around her shoulder as together they made their way back to the little girl that would change their lives forever.


	8. Chapter 8

Exactly seven days later, Mac and Will sat in the back of Lonny's SUV heading back to Manhattan with Sophie tucked tightly between them. The funeral had gone as well as could be expected in this kind of situation but the atmosphere in the SUV was definitely solemn even after Mac's earlier attempts to lighten the mood.

Sophie currently had her little hand wedged tightly in Mac's where it had been most of the day. After much discussion it had been decided that Sophie could come to the funeral with Will & Mackenzie. All was okay at first as she really didn't seem to have too much idea what was going on - she was more proud of the fact that she had a brand new dress, coat and shoes that Will had bought her the day before but she soon caught on that this was a sombre occasion and minute by minute she had started to get more and more upset – especially when she'd seen Will with tears in his eyes. After the service, while the burial had taken place Mac had volunteered to take Sophie for a play in the park and that's when Sophie had tucked her hand into Mac's. Much like her Uncle Will, it seemed to bring her great comfort and since that moment in the park Sophie had refused to let go of it – a fact that hadn't gone un-noticed by Will.

All in all, for a child of four, nearly five, Sophie had taken the news of her Mother remarkably well when they'd sat down that night and explained it all to her but apparently that was to be expected, as Mac had learned from the research she'd set Jim on a week or so ago. Mac herself had poured over many an article over the past week on child bereavement and realised that Will and her were doing pretty good so far in their actions. Maybe they weren't making this up after all.

It had been a tough ten days to say the least but somehow they had all gotten through it – mostly down to Mackenzie's show of love and comfort towards them both. Will seemed to be fine when he was utterly distracted from his thoughts but there were times, pretty much like now as he gazed out of the window of the SUV, when Mac knew he was doing everything he could to hold himself together for Sophie. It was these times when Mac felt useless to him – the last thing she could do right now with Sophie around was to hold him and let him cry and grieve but that would be the only thing that seemed to soothe him, so instead Mac offered him tender smiles and little winks that seemed to help him – if only for a couple of seconds at a time.

They had spent the past week living at Jess's house but tonight they were all heading back to Will's apartment for the first time. Just last night, they had sat Sophie down and explained that she was to live with Will in the big city and that she'd go to a new school and have a new bedroom which seemed to excite her beyond belief  
until the news came that Mac didn't live with Will – from that moment the smiles had disappeared and for the first time since this whole disaster had begun there was tears galore at bed time from the little girl.

Will had been visibly upset last night when Sophie had pushed him away and asked for Mac to tuck her in and read her a story and as much as Mac explained that it was probably Soph just missing the female Mother figure she'd been used to it didn't seem to appease Will too much – the confidence Mac had managed to build up in him over the past few days was disappearing fast and this was starting to worry her. After Sophie's bedtime tears, he had been distant for the rest of the evening and had finally gone out for a two hour walk at ten pm which did nothing to ease Mac's already frazzled nerves. She was cranky from lack of sleep, worried silly about how Will was going to cope and if she was honest, absolutely desperate for her own bed – Will and Mac had been taking turns to sleep on the sofa while the other one slept in Jess's bed but the sofa was doing nothing for Mac's stiff aching muscles.

The good thing about being away from the City though was Will and Mac had taken the time for many a discussion over the last eight days on how this would work and they had come up with a plan of sorts. They had decided that Sophie was young enough to be able to cope with a new lifestyle so they would continue to live full time at Will's apartment rather than Will moving into Jess's house. Mac had already started to get a list of possible schools together for Sophie in the City and had also started the look for a full time Nanny on Will's behalf.

This was already proving to be a problem for Will though – he hated the idea of Sophie being lumbered with a stranger for most of the afternoon when she returned from school and was even talking about taking a daytime slot at ACN rather than doing the evening news. That was an idea Mac was definitely not impressed with and she wanted to speak to Charlie to see if they minded Sophie coming into work for a couple of hours each night after school while both Will & Sophie got used to a Nanny. She was sure if she had a solid plan to go to Charlie with then he'd have no problems with it but first she had to have that plan straight in her own head. That was tomorrow's problem though – Mackenzie was due back into ACN tomorrow while Will still had some time off until Sophie was settled at a school. Tonight's problem was more about getting Sophie settled enough for Mac to go to her own apartment for the night. She hadn't left Will much on his own for a week now and she knew in the back of her mind he was becoming as dependant on her as Sophie was.

Mac felt a small head land against her shoulder and she looked down to see Sophie cuddled into her side with her shoeless feet tucked up underneath herself, her eyes tightly shut and little gentle snores escaping her mouth. She slipped her arm around Sophie and then looked up to see Will gazing at the two of them… For once she couldn't tell what the hell he was thinking…

"You okay?" Mac whispered, reaching her hand across and placing it on his arm…

Will nodded and instantly turned his attention back to road outside. Mac could tell from the way he was wringing his hands together that he was tense and she had a rough idea what it was about…

"Hey… it'll be fine tonight – you two are gonna be great."

"Can't you just stay tonight?" he asked, his eyes still out on the road…

"Will – we talked about this…."

Will attempted to smile as he looked back at Sophie… "I know… but somehow I think Soph would be happier if you stayed tonight…" Will muttered before letting his gaze fall back to the passing traffic once again….

"Will – we can't let her get…."

"Dependant on you – I know…" Will interrupted… "So you keep saying…"

"It's just not fair - on any of us…" Mac replied…. "You do understand don't you?"

"Yup."

His tone was harsh and it although she wouldn't let Will know, it hurt her, much more than it should. Mac didn't say anything more as they rode all the way home. She hadn't stayed in her own apartment since the night Will turned up from the hospital which was eight nights ago now. She did want to help and she knew Will was relying on her at the moment but she felt she had to be strong here – cruel to be kind sort of thing. In a few weeks' time life would have settled for them both and she'd no longer be required… She was okay with that and prepared to deal with the hurt that would inevitably cause herself but she knew somewhere in her mind that she shouldn't let Sophie depend on her being there if she was only going to lose another woman from her life a few weeks down the road. As tough as it may seem, somehow Will & Sophie had to figure this out between them – stand on their own two feet kind of thing - or perhaps four feet.

It wasn't too long until they pulled up outside Will's apartment on Hudson Street. Lonny parked up and set about unloading Sophie's bags and belongings from the SUV whilst Will stepped out of the car and pulled Mac's door open for her…

"Why don't you carry her up?" Mac whispered trying desperately not to wake Sophie…. "She's completely out of it still…"

Will chuckled as he reached across Mac and somehow pulled Soph into his arms without her waking…. "It's been a long day for her…"

Mac nodded and gathered coats and shoes from the SUV before following Will into the building and the elevator. As they entered the apartment Will made his way straight over to the sofa and laid Sophie down just as Mac slipped a cushion under the little girls head. As she settled without even waking, Will pulled the blanket from the back of the sofa down and wrapped it tightly around Soph….

"She looks so angelic when she's sleeping…." Will whispered, as he continued to gaze at her…

"She always looks angelic…" Mac replied giggling…

"You want a coffee?" Will asked, desperate to keep Mac with him for as long as he could….

It didn't take much for Mackenzie to figure out exactly what Will was hedging for as she nodded and followed him out to the kitchen…. Before they could get much further with the coffee making though there was a call from the doorman downstairs telling them they'd be up with Sophie's belongings straight away.

"Right, how about you make the coffee and I'll start on the guest room with Sophie's things…" Mac said, with a little glint in her eye, trying to let him know she'd be there for the next couple of hours at least… "Maybe I can work some magic in there until we can get it decorated – a woman's touch and all that!"

"A woman's touch? You?!" Will joked as he winked at her….

"Hey… I can be – you know – domestic…. When I want to be!"

"If you can make that room look any kind of decent tonight then the Chinese take away's on me later!"

"Chinese?" Mac questioned.

"Hey – you promised me Chinese – eight days ago now… Chinese and an old movie you said – you can't go back on it now!" Will said as Mac headed off to the guest room which was now to become Sophie's bedroom.

Mac knew what Will was up to as she started to pull toys and clothes and a duvet from Sophie's bags… she knew that he was desperate to keep her here as long as possible by the way he invented ways and ideas to keep her around. She wasn't complaining though – even under these awful circumstances she had enjoyed being in his company very much over the last week - to Mac it was the Will from years ago that had finally come back to her. All the barriers that had been built up through her betrayal, their years apart and his damn refusal to forgive her were very quickly being knocked down and were being replaced with the firm friendship they'd developed when they first met all those years ago. She could tell by the amount of times he'd reached for her hand over the past week, or by the way he'd put his arm around her as they were walking or mostly by the easy way their conversation flowed that he had forgotten all that had happened in the past and was hopefully moving on.

Mac was confused though by his apparent feelings towards her… She had spent a couple of hours talking to her Sister over the weekend, pouring her heart out and Rosie had told her repeatedly that sometimes, disasters like this, can help to bring two people back together if they were in love in the first place. Rosie had been insistent that Will had forgiven her completely over the past ten days but probably didn't even realise it as he had so many other things to cope with right now. Hopefully her little Sister was right – maybe she was wiser than Mac had ever given her credit for. Mind you, not even Mackenzie was impressed when Rosie had joked at the end of the call that she'd expect the wedding invitation in the post soon. That soon bought the conversation to a close and Mac smiled at the memory of her sister's laughter down the phone as she had hung up.

Mac pottered around setting out soft toys and making up Sophie's bed with her own, albeit very small, quilt and pillow from home and then hung out all her clothes in the wardrobe and placed all her toys on the shelves by the side of the bed. She placed the soft pink lamp that had sat next to Sophie's bed in Jess's house next to the big bed that would have to do for now…..

"Chinese will be half an hour…." Will said as he popped his head round the door a few minutes later…. " Wow…."

Mac had sent him away nearly an hour ago to take a long bath and to order some food rather than him bugging her while she had worked….

"Like it?" Mac asked, pleased with her work…

"Wow…. Looks different in here…." Will commented, making his way over to Mac… "Really Mac – it looks great…"

"It's all about having her own things around her – it should help her to settle a bit… but I do think you need to get it painted in here – and maybe get a smaller bed… she's gonna look and feel lost in that bed tonight…"

"Got it." Will answered as he sat down on the edge of the bed pulling a very tired Mac down with him…

"She's still sound asleep out there…" Will whispered…

"We'll wake her when the Chinese gets here…" Mac said as she laid her head on Will's shoulder…. "Maybe you could go out to the bed store with her tomorrow while I'm at work? Let her choose a new bed… I think she'd like that…."

"Maybe….. Or we could wait till the weekend – then you can come along too?" Will said as he picked up Mac's hand and stroked it tenderly….

"Wish you could stay with us tomorrow…" Will whispered after a few moments silence….

He had said it so simply and so quietly that it melted Mac's weary heart a little more than normal… "One of us needs to get back to the office for a while… we spoke about this Will?"

"I know…. I know… it's just….." Will stopped what he was about to say and took a deep breath, shaking his head at the same time….

"It's just? What?" Mac asked, lifting her head and meeting his gaze…

"I sound like a dick if I say what I was gonna say and I don't mean to sound like a dick..."

"Come on – I'm used to you saying stupid things…." Mac joked… "What?"

"I just wished I was going back too with you…. Wished things could go back to normal…."

"It's never going to be normal again Billy…. Not your kind of normal - you know that…. It's gonna be different but it's going to be great for you…"

Will nodded his head and rubbed his thumb across the back of Mac's hand…. "How did you get to be so good at this sort of thing?"

"Told you last week when I was making you breakfast – this is the new grown up Mackenzie." Mac said and then without even realising it she bit her bottom lip while a smile spread across her face….

Will joined her in a smile as he briefly bought her hand to his lips and pressed the softest of kisses on her hand…. "And I told you last week – I like the new grown up Mackenzie…"

Mac actually found herself taking a deep breath and exhaling quickly when she saw the look on his face…. It was a look she hadn't seen for so many years now – it was a look that said he was going to kiss her and for a moment she refused to believe the look in his eyes...

"I like her a lot…" Will mumbled just as he squeezed her hand and ever so slowly leant towards her, gently pressing his lips to hers in the softest of kisses…

Mac felt her heart jump in her chest and her eyelids involuntarily flicker shut just for the briefest of moments but they were soon wide open again as both Will & Mac heard a little voice from the doorway….

"Kenzie." Sophie whispered, rubbing her sleepy eyes….

Mac & Will pulled apart instantly and a very flustered Will somehow managed to find his voice before Mackenzie…. "Hey…. You okay little one?" Will asked, standing immediately… Within a few seconds he had made his way over to Sophie at the door and knelt down… "You fell asleep in the car darling…"

Sophie looked at Will, and then Mackenzie and then her eyes wandered around the room, a smile appearing on her face as she saw her dollies all lined up on the big bed…

"See what Kenzie did to your new room." Will said, using the nickname that he was growing to love the more he heard Sophie saying it…

Sophie smiled shyly and wandered a bit further into the room looking all around her as her eyes took in all her things from her old room…. Will stood and followed and Mac's heart ached with pride as Sophie silently reached for Will's hand holding it tightly….

Mac caught his eye but couldn't read him at all… that kiss was definitely more than a friendship kiss and she was still struggling to take it all in – to figure out what it meant….

"Look there's Ginger Bear." Sophie suddenly squealed, pulling her hand from Will's and racing over to the bed and pulling the old, furless bear into her arms hugging it tightly to her chest…

Sophie climbed up on the bed next to Mac and Will plonked himself down the other side of Sophie, his eyes meeting Mac's for the first time since their interrupted kiss... Will smiled at Mac, desperate to continue the kiss but he feared the moment had now passed. Before he had the chance to say another word though Sophie plonked the bear on Mackenzie's lap smiling happily…

"This is Ginger Bear…" she announced happily…

"That bear used to be your Mummy's when she was a little girl like you…." Will said stroking her hair gently as he spoke….

Sophie nodded knowingly… "My Mummy said he was an extra special bear and we had to love him lots as he's very old…."

Will's eyes instantly filled with tears and he had to stand and walk away so Sophie couldn't see him. Before he knew what was happening though Mac had come to the rescue once again and was showing Sophie where everything was in the room, babbling away and telling her that Uncle Will would take her shopping for a new bed very soon. Will had to chuckle as he heard Mackenzie promise that maybe together they could all paint the bedroom – any colour Sophie wanted! That had disaster written all over it he thought to himself – the thought of Mackenzie in charge of a paint brush was enough but Mackenzie & Sophie? Well, that was a disaster he would very much like to watch!

He watched on in awe as for a couple of minutes the two girls chatted away about absolute nonsense but Sophie seemed so happy and it also meant there wasn't that dreaded silence in the room that seemed to be happening more and more when Mackenzie wasn't about. Will smiled and thanked his lucky stars again that Mac was with him as she and Sophie made their way out of the bedroom for a tour of the apartment, Mac grabbing his hand as they went.

* * *

A couple of hours later Will flopped down onto the sofa next to Mackenzie and sighed… "She's sound asleep – I think I bored her into submission…."

"Please tell me you read her one of her books rather than the US Constitution?" Mac asked as she looked up from Will's laptop where she'd been trying to get up to speed with work…

"Mac - I'm noticing a pattern with everything - whether it be a toy or a book or a pair of pyjamas - it has to involve a Disney princess somewhere…. Apparently Belle is the best Princess ever in case you needed to know!"

Mac giggled at the sound of almost desperation in his voice. It had been a bit of a busy couple of hours as together they had showed Sophie around the apartment, eaten their Chinese and then bathed Sophie and gotten her ready for bed. Although Mac had been tucking her into bed the last couple of nights she explained to Sophie that this was Uncle Will's job from now on and then whispered that he really was the best at reading stories which of course had led to Sophie pleading with Will to read her Beauty And The Beast….

"Mac, I'm exhausted…. I'm starting to think I'm too old for this already…."

"It's been a long day with the funeral and everything." Mac replied… "It'll get easier…"

"I hope so."

"Just remember – one step at a time…" Mac said as she shut the lap top down and slid it on the floor… That phrase had become almost an anthem for her and Will over the last week and she had lost count already of how many times she'd said those five words.

"Anything going on I should know about?" Will asked nodding his head at the laptop and settling himself in the corner of the sofa….

"Nothing exciting." Mac replied honestly…. "It seems they're absolutely fine without us!"

Will grabbed the remote control and flicked ACN on – it was only ten to eight and News Night would be starting soon… "Let's see how well they're doing!" he mumbled, desperate to keep Mac with him for as long as possible and knowing that News Night would be keep her here until nine at least…

"What's the story with the ginger bear?" Mac suddenly asked, taking Will by surprise….

Will stole a glance at the woman sat beside him and held out his arm indicating for her to join him… Mac hesitated for a moment, unable to get that earlier kiss out of her mind… so far they had completely ignored it had even happened but she saw the pleading look on his face and knew she'd not be able to turn down an invite to snuggle in his arms. Mac slid up the sofa and into his waiting arms...

"I have to head home soon now Sophie's asleep…." Mac warned as he shifted about to get comfortable…

Will lifted his legs onto the coffee table and then gently pulled her head so it was resting on his shoulder and pressed the softest of kisses to her temple…

"Thought you wanted to hear about Ginger?"

Mac giggled and bought her feet up so they were tucked underneath her and marvelled at how much Will seemed to be opening up to her these days – it was almost as if he couldn't wait to tell her things he hadn't told her before….

"Carry on…" Mac whispered and pressed a tiny kiss to his chest…

"That little fella was known as Ol' Ginger in our house when we were kids… I bought it for Jess – shortly after she was born... I was only eleven but I remember so clearly buying it. I had it in my head that the new baby needed a bear to cuddle and I tried and tried to get Dad to buy one but he wouldn't… I remember when Mom came home from the hospital I used to stare at the baby and I got so upset 'cause she didn't have a teddy bear!"

Mac giggled and shook her head slightly – she could almost see the scene in her mind…

"Hey – I told you I was a wimp of a child!"

"Hardly…" Mac whispered…. She wrapped her arm across his chest and closed her eyes – it was so rare that he spoke about his childhood feelings that Mac liked to make him as comfortable as possible and just listen, letting him say whatever he felt…

"So I broke into my money box… I used to do jobs for Mom and the neighbours and would always save my pocket money…. I remember breaking into my money box and still not having anywhere near enough cash… so I snuck into my parents' bedroom… Dad was drunk and completely out of it of course so I stole twenty bucks from his pocket…. He had no idea - ever – I think he would have beaten the shit out of me if he'd woken up but I ran straight out and bought Ol' Ginger… Jess loved that fluffy little thing when she was a kid… Mom didn't even ask where I got the cash…."

"She probably knew Will… she just didn't let on…"

"It's funny…. I couldn't get her out of my head today you know - my Mom… All the way through that service all I could think was about her funeral – it bought back so many memories…."

"I'm sure that's only natural…" Mackenzie whispered in reply….

"Jess was so heartbroken when Mom died – I don't think she ever fully recovered... You know, it always surprises me at times like this - when you lose someone you love so much… On the outside, life goes on of course but inside, when you lose someone close, a part of you dies with them…. Life is never quite the same again…."

"They're together up there in heaven…" Mac whispered, hoping her beliefs would bring him some sort of comfort at this moment. She knew he didn't believe in heaven or anything like that – they'd had many a discussion over religion in the past but she firmly believed in an afterlife of some sort – what she didn't know but the optimistic soul inside of her believed something else existed after death.

Will laughed sarcastically and shook his head… "Mac – you expect me to believe there's a God and a heaven when he lumbered me with a drunken bastard of a Father, took my Mom from me too early and now takes Jess leaving a little girl without a Mother…. Sorry – can't agree with you on that one sweetheart…"

Without a further word, Will reached for the glass of scotch he had beside him and downed it completely in one gulp, he swallowed hard determined not to cry any more over memories of his family - he knew he had to get on with what life had thrown him or else he would fall apart completely and that wasn't an option now Sophie was around. As he settled back into position a moment later, Mac wrapped her arms around him as tightly as she could desperately wanting to take his away his hurt.

"Please Mac…. Stay with me tonight… I need you with me…." Will whispered a minute later, pressing a kiss to her head…

Mac sighed but didn't answer…. Instead she kicked off her shoes and pulled the blanket that had been over Sophie earlier so it covered the pair of them. She pressed a tiny kiss into Will's chest and started to watch the TV as News Night came onto their screen.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N - Thank you so much for the lovely comments & PMs for the previous chapter - see - they make me get on with the next one quickly!**

**Hope you enjoy this - you Charlie fans out there might like this chapter and I hope you'll all like how it ends!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Mackenzie awoke god knows how many hours later and noticed the TV was still flickering away although the sound had been turned right down. The last thing she had remembered was the credits rolling on News Night and Will joking how they never needed to return to work before he started to gently stroke her arm while placing tiny kisses to the side of her head. She felt so safe, so warm and so damn comfortable draped across his chest that it wasn't long before she had obviously fallen asleep and by the sounds of the gentle snores coming from Will he was fast asleep too.

Mac reached for her phone which was laying on the sofa and checked the time – it was five to five in the morning and somehow they'd managed to lay in this position for over eight hours which explained precisely why her back felt like it was about to split in two.

She twisted her head slightly to see Will sound asleep with his head leant back against the sofa and a small smile on his face. When they slept together in the past, before she'd ruined everything, she'd often wake in the morning to find Will gazing down at her and at the time she had never really fully understood why he liked to watch her sleeping… But she had to admit watching Will now, she finally realised how much it could make her feel for him – just to see him calm, peaceful and without a care in the world.

After five minutes of just watching him sleep Mackenzie knew she had to move… Firstly, she'd spent so long last night explaining to Sophie that she wouldn't be here in the morning when she woke up and she didn't want to confuse the poor little thing anymore than she was already was, and secondly, she had ten days of work to catch up on and she needed to get an early start if she stood a chance of being any use at work today. She started to move as gently as she could but she'd only moved the blanket off her when Will started to stir and sighed…

"Kenz?"

"Shhhh…." Mac whispered and stroked his cheek…. "Go back to sleep…"

She wriggled out from underneath his arm and off the sofa but by this time Will's eyes were fully open…

"Hey… Where you going?"

"Go back to sleep Will… it's only five – you can sleep for another couple of hours before Sophie wakes up…"

Mac got to her feet and began to tuck the blanket around Will completely….

"Don't go." Will mumbled sleepily and caught hold of her wrist, pulling her back towards him….

"Will – I have to shower and get into some clothes that are suitable for work… I can't live in your oversized t-shirts much longer you know!"

Will chuckled in his sleepy haze but still kept hold of Mac's wrist and closed his eyes again. Mac sat herself down right on the edge of the sofa and with her spare hand started to gently stroke Will's hair…. "Go back to sleep and call me later when you're both awake…. You two will be absolutely fine today – remember, one step at a time…"

Will nodded and reluctantly let go of her hand while Mac carried on gently stroking his hair…. It didn't take long until Mac heard his gentle snores again letting her know he was sound asleep once more. She grabbed her phone and made her way to the bathroom and splashed some water over her face in a vague attempt to wake herself up. A minute later she crept into Sophie's room to see the little girl sound asleep with Ginger Bear wrapped tightly in her arms – a sight that was so sweet it almost made Mac call in sick just so she would be able to spend the day with Will & Sophie .

Quietly, she crept over to the side of the bed and pulled the duvet up so it covered her little body and then ever so gently pressed a tender kiss to Sophie's cheek.

"Bye bye darling…" she whispered, so very quietly so she didn't wake her…

Next, she tiptoed over to Will and did the same thing, being careful not to wake him, before heading to the kitchen. She picked up a pen and a piece of paper and scribbled a note for him to call her when he was awake and then signed it with their new phrase "One step at a time". She leant the note up against the coffee maker and quickly crept from the apartment.

* * *

Her first morning back at work was much more difficult than Mac had ever imagined it would be. She'd never in her whole working career been the type of person to take a lot of time off from work but on the odd occasion she had she'd never once suffered the blues when she had returned to work. This morning was proving to be different though. She had arrived at work early enough and by the time she'd finished her second coffee she had caught up on her emails enough to be able to start the day.

So far so good but it was when everyone else started to arrive that Mac had found it difficult - she knew that their team were only interested in Will's wellbeing and were genuinely concerned for him - for them both - but the constant questions that were being fired at her every few minutes were starting to take their toll. For some reason Mac was finding she had to hold back the tears and twice already she'd had to taker herself off to the ladies room to try to get her emotions under control.

During the pitch meeting it hadn't gotten much better as Elliott was still anchoring and Don and Jim seemed to have everything under control – it was as if without Will she was hardly needed here anymore. The meeting soon came to an end and afterwards the questions started again much to Mac's dismay. The more questions that were asked the more Mac struggled to keep her emotions under control and annoyingly, the thing that was worrying her the most was the constant wondering just why the hell Will hadn't rung her yet.

However hard she tried for the next few minutes she couldn't concentrate on anything apart from what Will & Sophie were doing. She had even picked up her phone to ring them twice but the placed it firmly back on the desk each time – it was her who had decided she should leave them to cope by themselves and however hard it was for her she had to stick by it – it was for the good of all concerned she'd told herself many times.

"So, how's the first day back?"

Mac jumped as she looked up from the report she was desperately trying to concentrate on and couldn't hide her delight at seeing Charlie leant against the door frame grinning happily...

"Oh God, am I pleased to see a friendly face…" Mac muttered as she got up from her chair and met Charlie half way across the room….

"The troops are restless?"

"It's the constant questions… I can't beat them off for too much longer and I know Will wouldn't want it discussed like it was office gossip… Then I can't stop thinking about them two back home and how they're coping and I just I don't know where the hell my head is at the moment… but apart from that I'm fine…"

"Oh Mackenzie – what you're feeling is normal… You guys have been through one hell of an ordeal this past week – of course your head's all over the place…" Charlie replied, desperately trying to find the right words to comfort her… "If there's somewhere else you need to be we'll all understand here…"

"No… it's fine… I'm sorry…. I didn't mean to offload on you… There's just no one else to talk to about this…" Mac muttered feeling the emotion rise up through her body. She bit her lip in an attempt to stop the tears that she felt coming… She couldn't understand why she felt so bloody emotional right now but she did…. She shook her head and smiled weakly at Charlie, embarrassed by her actions but the moment he reached for her arm and stroked it gently the tears started to creep out of her eyes.

Charlie was shocked to see her cry – throughout everything they went through when her & Will split up he'd never once seen a single tear leave her eye – Will yes - but not Mackenzie. He wasted no time as he pulled her into his arms and held her for a few moments before pulling away and tugging the handkerchief from his top pocket… "Here – I don't like to see tears in those beautiful eyes…"

That almost started Mac off again as all she could see was her Father standing before her – that was a gesture her Dad would do when she was upset as a child – he'd find a handkerchief from his blazer pocket and dab her eyes and tell her silly jokes until she was okay again…

"I'm sorry Charlie… I don't know what the hell's wrong with me today…."

Charlie took her by the arm and slowly led her over to the sofa in the corner of her office… "You don't have to apologise to me kiddo… You know you can talk to me okay?"

"It's just… Oh god – forget it…. I'm being all emotional – it's ridiculous…" she said, waving her arms frantically in the air at absolutely nothing…

"It's not ridiculous – I would think it's normal considering the type of pressure you've had recently….. I'm guessing these tears would involve Will somehow?" Charlie asked, obviously already knowing the answer….

"How did you get to be so damn wise Charlie?" Mac asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and taking a deep breath in an attempt to stop the tears…

"It's the bourbon!" Charlie joked before taking her hand in his… "Kiddo, You're bound to be upset right now… I'm guessing you haven't slept properly since this whole thing began, haven't eaten properly right? And then there's Will – I'm know for certain you've been a good friend to him too because he's told me so… I would place a bet that you've been doing everything you can to comfort him and the kid – even if that meant ignoring yourself…."

Mac didn't answer but just nodded her head….

"He has been behaving himself hasn't he?" Charlie asked and Mac could tell he was slightly anxious in what he was asking…

"Yes – of course… he's been fine… Mind you, he doesn't know what he's doing half the time at the moment…. All this… it started out as helping a friend in need but now… Now I don't know what the hell it is… I'm so confused and I'm trying so hard to ignore what I feel but we've ending up falling asleep together more often than not this past week, there's been little kisses, hand holding and just when I thought I got it all straight with him yesterday he begs me to stay the night last night… I know he'll do the same tonight and I can't say no to him…Not when he looks so helpless right now…"

"Mackenzie I know you… you can ignore helpless – even when it comes to the mighty Will McAvoy… I would say it's more to do with the fact that you're in love with him rather than him looking helpless…"

Mac's head shot up but before she could say a word Charlie stood and smiled… "And there's nothing wrong with being in love with him so don't even try to deny it… Anyone with half a brain can see it and anyone with half a brain can see he's in love with you too…. You two kids just have to figure it out."

"I don't know Charlie… I don't think he's in love – I think his love for me ended years ago…. I think he's just clinging to what he can right now… He's scared, he's lonely and he's grieving the loss of his Sister while trying to be a parent for the first time…. When this all settles down I know I won't be part of their lives – they won't need me around and that's fine… it's just confusing for me at the moment… In a few weeks Will will go back to being… you know…"

"Will the idiot?" Charlie joked, a smile on his face…

"More like Will the betrayed boyfriend of years ago…. I know I deserve whatever comes my way but… it's just hard…"

Mac wiped the fresh tears that had fallen over the last minute away and smiled dejectedly at Charlie…

"Firstly – you don't deserve anything and secondly, all this closeness between you – it's just natural – just let it happen – don't fight it because who knows what might happen…"

"Sadly, I think I've well and truly lost that chance with him Charlie…"

"Whatever you say Mac… but I know he loves you still – he just finds it hard to….."

"Forget everything that's happened?" Mac finished for Charlie…

"Mackenzie – I don't know much about love these days but I do know you two kids have been in love with each other for what ten years? Maybe, with everything that's happened, you needed something like this to realise just what you mean to each other… I bet he's not even thinking about what happened before…."

"You sound like my Sister – she said the same thing on the phone the other day…"

"Well, maybe she drinks too much bourbon too – she sounds like a genius!"

As Mackenzie giggled, Charlie heard a commotion outside the office door and smiled to himself… "Hey… wipe those tears away kiddo – you've got company…"

Mac looked up as Charlie opened the office door to reveal Will & Sophie walking towards them hand in hand…. The minute Sophie saw Mac she let go of Will's hand and ran as fast as she could into the office...

"Kenzie…" she shouted as she landed in Mac's waiting arms and clung on tightly….

Both Will and Charlie watched as Mackenzie picked up Sophie and spun her around in her arms, the sound of their giggles and chatter warming both their hearts… "I was just wondering about you little one…" Mac said placing a kiss on both of Sophie's cheeks… "Have you had a good morning?"

"It's good to see you Son…" Charlie said, pulling Will inside the office and hugging him briefly…. "We've missed you around here!"

"Hey Soph – this is Uncle Charlie!" Will said but the little girl hid herself shyly behind Mackenzie's leg, still clinging onto her hand… "I know – I'd be scared of him too!" Will added making his way over to Mac and kissing her lightly on the cheek as if it were the most natural gesture in the world…

"What are you guys doing here?" Mac asked, her cheeks blushing slightly from the peck on the cheek in front of Charlie…

Will plonked himself down on the sofa and Mac swore she hadn't seen him as upbeat as this for a long time… He was wearing a natural happy smile Mac hadn't seen in years and he had a real sparkle in his eyes…

"Well…. Sophie & I went out shopping after breakfast this morning… Hey Soph – tell Kenzie what I made you for breakfast…" Will said, pulling Sophie onto his knee….

"Boiled eggs & marching soldiers…" Sophie squealed excitedly, waiting for a reaction from Mac…

"Hey – that's my favourite…" Mac said, sitting down next to Will on the Sofa… "Did the soldiers march around the plate and jump into the egg?" Mac asked...

Sophie giggled loudly… "They jumped into the egg then into my mouth..."

"See – I told you Kenzie would say you had to make the soldiers march around the plate didn't I?" Will said, winking at Sophie…. "She didn't believe me Mac." Will added, looking at Mac happily - both of them remembering a silly but happy breakfast from many years ago…

"Anyway," Will continued, as his hand lightly stroked Sophie's long blonde hair… "After breakfast, we went shopping for a new bed but once we got to the bed store and looked around Sophie decided she wanted to keep the old one because – hey wait for this - that way there's enough room for all her dollies and teddies to go to bed with her every night…." Will explained looking from a giggling Sophie to a beaming Mackenzie…. "So, instead we went to choose some paint so you can come help us paint at the weekend Kenz… and what colour did we pick young lady?"

Will looked down at Sophie who was crawling across his lap and onto Mac's… "Yellow" she shouted, as she sat on Mac's lap – her little legs dangling over the side of Mac's…

"And tell Kenzie why we have to have yellow Soph?" Will asked, arching his eyebrow at Mackenzie and shaking his head in mock despair… "Wait till you hear this…" he whispered to Mac…

"Because it's the colour of Belle's dress when she becomes a princess…" Sophie said excitedly, jumping up and down on Mac's legs….

"Of course it is! Because it's the colour of Belle's dress when she becomes a princess." Will repeated, trying to look exasperated but failing miserably…. "What other reason would there be? And, apparently, your bedroom will look the best if it's the colour of Belle's dress! Did you know that?"

Mac giggled and pulled Sophie into her for a hug… "Well, I think Sophie's spot on – what better colour is there for a room than the colour of Belle's dress?"

"I should have known you'd agree with her!" Will said, nudging Mac's shoulder…

"Us girls have to stick together don't we Soph?" Mac said, pulling Sophie's hair band out from her hair and redoing her pony tail… "Soph… I think your Uncle Billy needs lessons in how to do your hair!"

"They're ganging up on me already Charlie…. The hair looked perfect, yes?"

"Hey, don't you bring me into this…" Charlie said watching the perfect family scene play out in front of him so naturally… Whatever Mac's thoughts earlier about her not being needed were obviously rubbish - he could only see this relationship heading one way and that was up the aisle...

Will chuckled and leant his head back wearily on the sofa and rested his hand on Mac's arm… "Hey… I know you're busy but have you got time for lunch with us?"

"Yes she has." Charlie answered from the doorway, a smile a mile wide appearing on his face… "And before you can argue Ms MacHale – that's an order!"

Mac giggled and smiled back at Will… "Seems like that's a yes." She replied feeling a flutter in her tummy at the look of happiness on Will's face…

"Shall we go and introduce her to the troops?" Mac suggested… "They've been asking after you all morning and I didn't know what you wanted to say… I can't cope with anymore of their questions…"

"Sure… You go ahead and I'll be out in a minute…." Will said… "I don't really want to talk about it too much right now... but don't be too long – those marching soldiers didn't fill me up much this morning – I'm starving…"

"You had eggs and soldiers too?" Mac asked giggling…

"Of course – we had to see whose soldiers could march to our tummies the quickest!"

Oh my…" Mac giggled as she stood and took Sophie by the hand and made her way towards the door… "I'm almost pleased I didn't have to watch that one!... Dare I ask who won?... No – you know what – I don't want to know!... Come on Sophie darling – let's go say hello to Jim…"

Will chuckled as he watched Mac head out the office and towards Jim's desk, Sophie skipping along happily next to her… "I'm not sure which one of those two babbles the most… you should hear the conversations they have sometimes…" Will said laughing…

"How's it going?" Charlie said, taking a seat next to Will…. "You okay?"

"Yeah… I think so… I have no idea what the hell I'm doing with this parent/guardian thing but it feels good today… I like days like today…"

"You look like you're doing great…. Apart from the hair of course!"

Will laughed and stood up to watch Mackenzie proudly introduce Sophie to Jim…

"Hey – I don't think the hair is bad for a fifty two year old man who's never tied a ponytail in his life! I'm amazed she looks semi-presentable considering I was in charge this morning!"

Charlie joined Will and noticed the huge smile that was across his friends face as he watched the scene unfold outside – he couldn't remember a time seeing Will quite as chirpy…

"So… you and Mac?" Charlie asked, knowing he was probably pushing it a bit but feeling he should say something… "You two kids seem closer than normal…"

Will smiled and nodded his head….. "I don't know how the hell I would have even got through one day of all this without her… She's been amazing and she's so good with Sophie…. a real rock…."

"And you've told her that I hope…. You're not still messing with her? She's fragile too you know….."

For the first time all morning Will felt his smile begin to fade as he took in the seriousness on Charlie's face… "I'm not messing her about." he stuttered defensively…

C'mon Will… You have done this past year… I'm not sure she could handle it now – not after everything that's happened this week..."

Will looked up at Charlie before he let his eyes wander back over to Mackenzie and the small crowd that was growing around her…. "That was different…" Will muttered…. "Everything's changed now… Everything's different…"

Charlie rested his hand on Will's shoulder and patted it… "I can see that Son… Just make sure you do something about it – that's all I'm saying… She deserves some happiness…. You both do…"

"I'm trying…. But it still scares the crap out of me…" Will mumbled, feeling slightly ashamed at his inability to actually do something concrete about his feelings for her even after all the closeness of the past ten days…

"Why?" Charlie questioned, raising his eyebrow…. "I already told you – when you find the special one… You need to hold onto it…"

"Because I still don't know what she wants – whether she's doing all this because she feels guilty about before, because she's a friend… Will she want to take me on with a child as well? I don't really know how long she plans to stay around before she heads off to some warzone again or until she gets a better offer from another station… That contract was for three years – that only leaves one more year… She's never stayed longer than two years anywhere she's been…."

"Then give her a reason to stay Will - do something to keep her here for good…. She's right here and she's waiting for you to make your move."

"You think so?" Will asked, his face looking genuinely surprised…

"I think if you asked her to stay – really asked her to stay - she'd settle for the rest of her life – I promise you that."

Will gazed out into the Newsroom and watched Mackenzie introducing Sophie to his team… She turned round while Maggie was chatting to Sophie and she smiled and gestured for him to come over… Seeing her standing there, the smile on her face and the look in her eye seemed to hit him like a ton of bricks and for a moment he felt a little dizzy…

All the talk with Habib about cheating, betrayal and forgiveness - it was all bullshit… Forget finding a way to forgive her - it simply came down to the fact that he loved her and he wanted to be with her – for forever – till death do us part kind of forever. He was happiest when he was with her – this last week had proved that point clearly enough and someone who had supported him like Mackenzie had supported him through this terrible ordeal surely must be in love with him too. Then his mind wandered back to the hospital when he was sick – how she'd hardly left his bedside the whole time, how she'd badgered him for weeks about what the message said… how she got that dreamy look on her face every time he'd come close to telling her…

"God, I've been a fucking idiot, haven't I?" Will suddenly muttered under his breath….

Charlie watched his friend as the recognition finally dawned on him, followed by the biggest smile he'd ever seen appear on Will's face…

"Go take those girls of yours for a nice lunch…. They deserve it." Charlie whispered…

Will smiled and shook Charlie's hand vigorously… "I like the sound of that – 'girls of yours'…"

"So do I" Charlie said to himself as he watched Will make his way over to Mackenzie & Sophie and the small adoring crowd that had engulfed his two girls.

* * *

"So…. Apart from an amazing sounding breakfast and yellow paint shopping, how's it gone this morning?" Mackenzie asked Will once the three of them were sat in a booth in Mac's favourite Deli a few blocks from the studio…

"It's been a good day today…" Will said marvelling at how natural Mac was with Sophie as she got her settled and started to read her the menu….

Once they ordered their lunch, Mac pulled out a notebook from her bag and a bunch of crayons for Sophie to occupy herself with…

"What about you? How's it been in there this morning?" Will asked… "Missed me?"

"Of course I did…" Mac replied, wondering if Will realised just how much she'd missed him… "And now I've heard your morning I wished I was eating eggs and marching soldiers with you two!"

Will chuckled and gazed across the table at Mac & Sophie who of course had chosen to sit next to Mackenzie… He'd hardly been able to stop gazing at her since they'd left the office all the time thinking how he had to talk to her and as soon as possible… Walking to the Deli they'd both taken one of Sophie's hands each and Will was certain he'd never been prouder than that moment walking along like a family - his family…

"Will? You okay?" Mac asked, bringing him out of his dreamworld…

"What? Yeah…." He mumbled trying to remember what she'd said a moment before and then it came to him – marching soldiers!… "Well, we did think the marching soldiers part would be better with the three of us! I promised Sophie you'd stay for breakfast at the weekend if you could – maybe a sleepover type of thing on Saturday night?" Will added, smiling at her hopefully…

"Will – you're fifty two years old…. I think you're too old to call it a sleepover!"

"Yeah well… I was kind of thinking that if I made out like it was Sophie who was desperate for you to stay over you wouldn't realise that it was actually me…."

"Will…." Mac whispered…. His face was suddenly so sad but so hopeful at the same time…

"Shhh…. Please don't say no - not now…. It'll upset Sophie…" Will said quietly, nodding his head to the little girl that was totally oblivious to everything that was going on around her….

Mac waited a moment with more tears threatening to fall…. Her head telling her to let this tender moment go, to ignore it like she's ignored so many moments between them but her heart was pleading with her to do anything he wanted – anything at all… Finally she took a breath and managed to find her voice…

"Who will it upset? Sophie or You?"

For a moment Will considered whispering a lie but he knew he couldn't – not anymore - there had been enough lies over the years …. "Both of us…"

"Both?" Mac repeated…

Will reached for her hand and gently wrapped his own around hers… "Yeah… both of us… We missed you so much this morning Kenz..."

"You did?" Mac replied instantly, noticing he had that look again – the look he had just before he kissed her yesterday….

"Yeah…. You see… We love you…."

Mac swallowed the giant sized lump that appeared in her throat and although most of her body had turned completely numb she seemed to be able to feel Will squeezing her hand….

"We?" Mac finally replied, a faint trace of hope in her voice….

"Yeah… We…." Will said, reaching for her other hand… "You see – it seems both Sophie & I suffer from the same fate when it comes to you… We both fell in love with you from the day we met you… and the thing about falling in love with you Mackenzie is, it's pretty much impossible to stop loving you once you fall."


	10. Chapter 10

"Okay – I have English tea and I have cookies, so come on – Spill the beans…" Sloan ordered, slipping into Mackenzie's office around 5pm that afternoon but she soon stopped her giggling when she caught sight of her friend… "Hey - You okay Kenzie?" she asked seeing Mac sitting at her desk with her head buried in her hands…

Lunch had been somewhat of an awkward situation after Will's admission and although Mackenzie had just started to reply to him she didn't get the chance to utter another word as the waitress had turned up with their lunches. Will had dropped her hand the moment he saw the hesitation in Mac's eyes and then the waitress busied herself setting out all their plates for the next minute or so and suddenly the moment was gone.

Sophie had pushed her colouring to the side and tucked straight into her hamburger chattering away busily for the next few minutes not even realising that neither Will or Mac were concentrating too much on what she was saying.… At one point Mac had gently reached across the table and stroked his arm desperate to be somewhere alone with him so they could talk… She'd whispered that they'd talk later and Will seemed to accept that for the time being and the conversation improved slightly for a while.

As they strolled back towards the office after lunch Mac had linked her arm through Will's for the whole walk trying to let him know what she was thinking as Sophie nattered away to Will but Will's earlier chipper mood had definitely faded away. As they reached ACN Mackenzie had kissed Sophie goodbye and then came the most awkward moment between Will & Mackenzie that they had experienced for months. After gazing at each other for a moment or two Will suddenly mumbled a brief goodbye and took Sophie's hand and turned towards the direction of Central Park. Mac watched them until they were out of sight, her heart aching in her chest as she watched them walk away – Will didn't turn his head once.

Mac had gotten straight back to the office and sent him a text saying that she'd come round later if that was okay with him and they could talk but it was four hours later and still she hadn't had a reply from him.

"Kenzie?"

Mac looked up seeing her friend looking worried…

"I'm okay… it's just been one of those awful days - days I seem to be having near enough every day lately…"

"You have news though right? I saw Will hold your hand walking out to lunch – we all did…."

"Sloan – not now please…" Mac begged… "I have a headache from hell…"

But Sloan had already pulled out a chair and made herself comfortable….

"Arggghhh Sloan – I'm really not in the mood for more talking about me & Will… some other time okay?

Sloan nodded for once realising from the tone in her voice that Mac wasn't in the mood for chatting… "How about cocktails tonight?"

Mac was so very tempted to say yes – she could just do with a 'Sloan Night' getting absolutely hammered and letting go but she knew she had to go and see Will – she had to talk to him…. She grabbed a cookie from the plate and shook her head… "I can't… I have to see Will…"

Sloan raised her eyebrows as Mac thought she might…. "And you said nothing happened?"

"I didn't say nothing happened – I said I didn't want to talk about it…" Mac replied…

"Ahhh - So something did happen?" Sloan kept on pushing…. "Come on Kenzie – I'm as invested in this relationship as you – I've spent long enough watching you mope over him!"

"I don't mope…" Mac replied but she knew in the back of her mind somewhere Sloan had a point – there had been many a cocktail shared over conversations of Will and the love she'd lost…

"Come on speak… something's happened!" Sloan pushed, a huge grin on her face…

Mac realised there was definitely a 'I'm not moving' kind of grin on her friends face and sighed…. "Well…. it depends what you mean by something? We've shared a bed more often that not the past week, I've lost count of the little kisses, hand holding, hugging and oh… Will told me he loved me this afternoon…. Do you think that's something?"

Mac regretted her words the moment she saw Sloan's jaw drop to the floor – she had well and truly opened herself up for a grilling now…. "Look – before you say anything Sloan – he didn't mean it so don't get too excited…."

"No offence Kenz but that doesn't sound like the sort of thing Will would say without meaning it…"

"No I grant you that… but you don't know what he's like right now…. He's still in shock, he's still grieving, one moment he's up the next he's down… He's trying to come to terms with having to be Mother & Father to a four year old girl that I have totally fallen in love with and who has taken a shine to me too….. So I think he sees me as a mother to Soph rather than a lover to him! I promise you he doesn't mean it…"

"He told you he was in love with you?" Sloan asked again, excitement spreading to every part of her body…

Mac shook her head, starting to get slightly exasperated with Sloan… "Did you just hear anything I just said?"

"Kenz – he actually told you he loved you?"

"Yep."

"And you told him what?" Sloan asked, crossing her legs to get comfortable and passing Mac a mug of tea…

Mac closed her eyes – almost ashamed of her actions now – or lack of them now….

"Tell me you told him you loved him too?"

"Not exactly…."

"You told him what Kenzie?"…. Her voice was getting more and more serious with each comment…

"Nothing… the waitress turned up with our lunch…"

"You didn't say you loved him back?"

"I told you – the waitress…"

"What? Did she sit on Will's lap and eat with you or something? You must have said something Kenzie?"

"Sloan – do you have any idea what it's like lunching with an excited four year old having her first lunch in the big city? There's not a lot of time for declarations of love when you're busy calming her down, cutting up her food and making sure she doesn't tip her milkshake everywhere…"

"But Will managed it…"

"I told you already Sloan – he doesn't mean it… Honestly, he's clinging onto anything he can – he'd tell Don he was in love with him if he'd been with him for the past ten days like I have…"

"Oh gross… Please Kenz – you've just put an image of Don & Will kissing into my head and now I've never gonna be able to get rid of it!... Seriously, this is Will we're talking about… You've been waiting for him to make a move for two years…. I'm rubbish at this relationship game but even I know you have to go and speak to Will now… tell him you love him back before it's too late."

Mac sighed, just as her phone started to beep and vibrate…. She looked down to see a text from Will and couldn't help but smile at the picture he'd sent her – they were obviously baking a cake as Sophie was sat on Will's kitchen counter licking a big mixing bowl, her face covered in chocolate cake mix …. A moment later a second text followed saying 'There's a slice here for you if you're free after work.'

"Okay – so that's from the man in question - I can tell from the goofy grin on your face…"

Mac looked up to see Sloan grinning at her whilst sipping her tea….

"Sloan – go do what you do…. Go do something intelligent that I can't understand! I have to get this finished…"

Sloan giggled and stood up…. "This isn't over Mackenzie – I will make it my personal mission to make sure you say it back to him…."

"Bye Sloan." Mac replied, waving her out of the office…

"Say Hi to lover boy for me!" she drooled as she left the office taking her cookies with her!

* * *

Mac had almost kissed Charlie when she'd asked if she could leave early and he'd near enough escorted her out of the door! She was currently sat in the cab on the way to Will's apartment and was trying to think just how the hell she'd bring this conversation with Will up again without causing damage to their newly flourishing relationship. She knew him inside out – she knew he'd act like nothing had ever happened and she knew it was up to her to somehow get this topic back out in the open. It wasn't as if she didn't love him – she knew he was the only person she ever wanted to spend the rest of her life with but she wouldn't spend her life with him if it was just for Sophie's sake – she had to be sure Will was actually in love with her – not with the idea of having a ready-made mother for Sophie.

The traffic was light and it wasn't long before the cab pulled up outside Will's apartment… Mac made her way into the building and the doorman just waved her straight over the elevators. A couple of minutes later, Mac poked her head around the corner of the elevator in Will's apartment and she couldn't help but smile at the scene before her as she saw Will & Sophie both laid out on the sofa watching TV – Sophie with her head on Will's lap….

"You two look comfortable." She said causing Will to jump out of his skin….

"Kenzie…" Sophie shouted, wearily holding her arms out wide for a hug but not moving one inch from her cosy spot on the sofa…

"Jesus Mac – you scared the crap out of me…" Will muttered as she threw her coat and bag on the chair and made her way over to the sofa…

"Your doorman said to come straight up!" Mac giggled…. "I'm obviously a regular now eh?!"

She reached Sophie who still had her arms out for a hug and pulled her into a long hug, loving the feeling of holding the little girl in her arms… "What are you making her watch?" Mac asked Will as she pulled away from Sophie and gently placed her hand on Will's shoulder…

"We're watching highlights of last night's game aren't we Soph?"

Sophie giggled and nodded wildly….

"Tell Mac what we say…." Will said, nudging Sophie's shoulder with his hand…

"GO JETS!" Sophie shouted giggling again….

"YEAH – GO JETS!" Will repeated, high fiving with Sophie…

"Poor kid…" Mac whispered into Will's ear as she ruffled his hair…

"We had a deal – I just watched Beauty & The Beast so Soph has to watch this with me…" Will replied as Mac kicked off her shoes, all the time shaking her head jokingly…. "Why aren't you at work?" Will added, looking at his watch…

"Because, Mr McAvoy, someone promised me homemade chocolate cake! Where is this masterpiece?"

Never had one sentence caused so much excitement in the McAvoy apartment! Sophie suddenly remembered the cake and squealed… A second later she jumped up off the sofa grabbing Mac's hand and dragging her towards the kitchen at the same time telling Mac step by step how they'd made the cake! Mac giggled and looked over her shoulder to see Will pulling himself off the sofa and following them…

"Someone's excited from her cake making session!" Will chuckled as he reached up into the cupboard and bought down the tin…. "I think I may have made a rod for my own back here!"

He pulled off the lid and handed the tin to Sophie so she could show Mac… "Careful pumpkin – hold it tightly…" he whispered, placing a kiss on the top of her head…

Sophie proudly bought the tin over to Mackenzie and showed her the cake inside….

"Wow – that looks delicious…" Mac said, causing Sophie to smile…

"I put the icing all over all on my own…" Sophie replied, looking so very proud of herself…

"I can see that darling…" Mac answered, scooping a bit of icing onto her finger and then sucking it off…. "Hey – who's eaten all this cake?!" Mac joked, pointing to the two big slices that were obviously missing….

"We did…." Sophie shouted, turning to look at Will…

"Guilty as charged…." Will said holding his hands up… "Want a slice?"

Mac nodded and took the tin over to Will…. "Please tell me you gave her something else for tea – not just a giant lump of chocolate cake?"

"Hey… I'm not that bad…" Will replied, pulling a plate from the cupboard above his head… "She's had pasta a la McAvoy for dinner and a nice healthy yoghurt for desert I'll have you know…"

"And then a giant lump of chocolate cake before bedtime!" Mac giggled…

"Yeah – you got me there… I, on the other hand have had just the giant lump of cake for my dinner – fancy letting me cook for you once Soph's in bed – just me and you?" Will asked….

"Sound's perfect…" Mac replied, unable to stop herself wrapping her arms around him and laying her head on his chest, squeezing him tightly….

Will was slightly taken aback for a moment but he soon put the plate down and pulled Mac into a hug…. "You okay?" he asked a moment later, not remembering Mac hugging him this tightly in a long while… She didn't answer for a while and when Sophie skipped off back to the TV a moment later Will pulled Mac away to see tears glistening in Mac's eyes…

"Hey… come on darling….no tears…" Will whispered, gently wiping the moisture from Mac's cheeks….

Mac shook her head slightly and then buried her head back into Will's chest mumbling something into his shoulder – something Will couldn't quite figure out but he knew from old that the thing Mac needed most when she was upset was a hug... He held her for a few more moments before pulling her chin up so she had to look him in the eye…

"What's up?" he asked, grateful that Sophie was completely occupied with the TV, snuggled up in the corner of the sofa….

"I'm sorry…" Mac replied, wiping at her cheeks roughly – obviously annoyed with herself for the tears… "I don't know what the hell is wrong with me today… I cried in front of Charlie earlier and then nearly did with Sloan…. What's happening with me?"

"They won't mind…" Will said, trying to comfort her…

"Maybe not, but I do…" Mac mumbled, resting her head back down on Will's chest…

"It's probably my fault…" Will whispered after a couple of seconds, "I've been loading everything onto you since this happened and that's unfair… It's not even your problem…. I'm sorry - things will get better from now on – I promise…"

Mac's head shot up when she heard his words, the last thing she wanted for Will to think he was being a burden to her…

"Oh God Will - it's not that – I promise… I want to be here to help you through this… I love Sophie to bits and I love helping you with her…" She gazed at him for a while and without even realising started to cry again…. "Please don't think it's that…. I'm probably just tired… I've hardly slept well the past week – just a few hours here and a few hours there and usually on a sofa – you know how cranky I get when I need my bed!"

Will nodded and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and bought her back into his arms….. He knew in the back of his mind it was probably what he said to her at lunch time adding to her troubles but he really didn't feel up to talking about it now – especially with Sophie still up – they needed to wait until it was just the two of them.

He'd tried all afternoon to occupy his thoughts elsewhere – hence the baking with Sophie and the TV watching. He truly hated moments like this – moments when his heart wanted to pour his feelings out to her, to hold her and kiss her and let her know just how much she means to him but his brain generally always stopped him – unable to form the right words for fear of rejection again… But this time he was determined he would convince her, somehow he would find the words to assure her that he loved her… Even if he had to wait and tell her day by day, little by little then he would….

Mac pulled away, bringing Will out of his thoughts…..

"And I needed that hug…" Mac said, sighing and breaking the horrible silence that had settled over them….

Will noted her conversation changer and sighed under his breath…. He gently stroked the side of Mac's face before leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to her cheek…

"Kenz, If I upset you with what I said earlier then I'm sorry…" Will said, hoping beyond hope Mac could see that he genuinely meant what he was saying – the last thing he wanted to do was upset this new balance between them…

"It's not that – honest… I…." Mac started, but Will interrupted her straight away…

"Then what is it?" he pleaded….

"It's just that… I... I…" Mac stopped and bit her lip, her eyes instantly filling with tears again….

"Shhhh – Please don't get tearful - not with Sophie here – she'll get so upset if she see you like this…"

Mac nodded, agreeing completely with what Will was saying…. "We do need to talk though Will…" Mac added seriously, slightly nervous at what his reaction would be..

"Of course" he replied… "We'll talk later okay? After dinner? And I promise I'll pack you off early so you can sleep in your own bed tonight… okay?!"

Mac laughed and smiled gratefully at Will…. As expected of course, Will had been acting like nothing had happened until a moment ago but now Mac realised he was being an absolute darling about it all and she started to wonder whether she was completely over-reacting to everything that had happened today – whether she was just over tired and just not ready to return to work and maybe Charlie, Sloan & Will were right after all. Maybe it was time for her and Will to sort out all the crap between them and realise once and for all what they want from each other…. So much for the grown up Mackenzie she thought to herself – she really had thought she had this thing with Will under control for the past two years but obviously not – not according to the amount of times she'd fallen apart today.

Will had obviously noticed the thoughtful look that had come across Mackenzie's face…. He handed her the cake and glanced over at Sophie… "Mac – can you tell me how a kid of four knows how to work a TV remote control better than I do? I didn't even know what a TV was when I was four!"

"You're sounding old Will!..." Mac giggled, grateful for him changing the subject so easily… she wiped away her tears and took a deep breath to compose herself, once again smiling at him…. "Look – it's Dora the Explorer on TV!"

"Dora the what?" Will questioned… "What's happened to the Jets?"

Mac giggled and grabbed a fork from the draw… "Come watch Dora with us – you'll learn something Billy!"

"Hey Pumpkin, who's switched over my TV? Back to the Jets please!" Will yelled from the kitchen but Sophie just looked at her Uncle and waved the remote control at him laughing cheekily….

"See how much she listens to me already?" Will mumbled following Mac over to the sofa…

"Ignore him Soph… This is so much better than those silly Jets!" Mac said once she'd sat down, not even daring to sneek a cheeky look at Will for his reaction…

Will watched as Mac got comfortable on the sofa and instantly snuggled up next to Sophie – their usual inane chatter starting up once again - this time about Dora & her friend Boots….

"Do you two have some kind of secret language? What the hell are you talking about?" Will said as he sat himself down next to Mac…

"Isn't it obvious?" Mac giggled, devouring her slice of cake…

"Do they teach you girls this sort of thing at school of something?" Will joked… "Either that or you spend your weekend watching way too much children's TV Mac" he added… "Who's Dora the Explorer?"

"Dora, Boots & Swiper…" Soph said, pointing at the screen before she clambered across Mac and wedged herself in the tiny gap between Will & Mackenzie…

"Yeah come on Will…" Mac giggled… "Everyone knows who Dora, Boots & Swiper are!" she said, feeding him a fork full of chocolate cake that he really wasn't expecting…

"Swiper no swiping"…. Sophie shouted, giggling as Mackenzie repeated the phrase a second later looking up at Will…

"Now you know how I feel when you and Sloan start going on about economics!" Mac joked, placing her arm behind Sophie's neck so it rested on Will's chest…

Will shook his head and wrapped his arm around Mac's shoulder pulling both Mac & Sophie into his side…. He chuckled to himself as the pair of them starting to babble away about chocolate cake, hamburgers for lunch and a hispanic girl with a monkey for a friend or some sort of similar nonsense! He had absolutely no idea what the hell they were talking about but he did realise that at that precise moment he couldn't remember a time feeling quite so happy & contented as he did with his two girls so close.

The more and more he watched the two of them, the more and more he was realising just how much he'd fallen for Mackenzie again – hook, line & sinker… This wasn't a new thing to him though, he'd known since last May of course, since the Bin Laden broadcast, the cookie fuelled phone message and everything else that followed – he just hadn't realised quite how much he'd fallen – mainly due to all the barrier's he'd put in the way since that un-answered phone-call and all the months of denial that followed.

As he sat and listened to them giggling, the more he thought of all the chances he's wasted and all the hurt and worry he'd caused Mackenzie since May the 1st and how time and time again she was there for him, always smiling, always taking his crap and always offering the hand of friendship…. He let his hand wander slightly, his fingers playing idly with her hair until she looked across at him and smiled a smile that hit him straight in the heart….

He felt tears of his own come to his eyes as he laid his head back against the sofa and once again he cursed himself for being such an idiot to not have won her heart months ago when maybe he had the chance.

* * *

** Thanks for all the previous replies everyone... They do keep me inspired to write so keep em coming!**

**x**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N - Okay - so this is the chaper some of you have been waiting for - time for Will to work hard to win her heart!**

**Hope you like it - I find these sort of chapters hard to write! **

**Thanks for the kind words for the previous chapter - I love to hear what you think!**

**x**

* * *

Dinner was a quiet affair although Will did manage to catch a very jaded Mackenzie up on the schooling situation. They had an interview with one of Manhattan's top prep schools for Sophie and hopefully if she was accepted then she could start school as soon as next week which would at least mean Will could get back to work – even if it meant they had to sort out some kind of routine for Sophie after school.

"I'd forgotten just what an amazing cook you are…" Mac said softly as she sat down in the corner of the sofa that she had claimed as her own many years ago – amazingly enough the corner that Sophie was now taking over….

It was so obvious to Will that she was making small talk and he knew now was the time for talk – he couldn't put it off any longer. Will had never been a fan of talking things through – he preferred actions to words but he knew Mackenzie needed to hear the words – she needed to know reasons for everything that had been said and she needed to make sense of it before her mind would accept the situation. Feeling in need of some Dutch courage, Will poured himself a scotch and took his place next to Mac on the sofa.

She'd hardly said a word throughout dinner and what she had said was very down and half-hearted which was most unlike the Mackenzie of recent days. He understood the reasons though - she was tired and she was struggling to cope and he knew he had confused the life out of her over lunch. The thing was though - he hadn't meant to confuse her – he hadn't even planned to tell her that he loved her that soon, and definitely not over a hamburger with Sophie sitting with them. But, after his talk with Charlie and the realisation in her office of his feelings he couldn't help himself once the moment had presented itself…. It was like the old line – when you realised what you wanted for the rest of your life – you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible….

"Mac...?"

She didn't answer…. Showing more confidence than he felt, Will reached for Mac's hand and took it in between his two hands…. He rubbed his thumb across the back of her hand and squeezed it slightly, trying to get her to look at him…

"Kenz?"

That had always been a sure way to get her attention… Mac turned her head and met his eye and it saddened him to see tears there – tears that he knew were caused by him… They hadn't fallen but they were most definitely there...

"You want to talk?"

Mac nodded and Will reached to wipe a single tear that had fallen onto her cheek but in true Mackenzie fashion she realised what was happening and switched from sad and vulnerable into full action mode in a single second. She sat up straight, removed her hand from his and turned to face him…

"Will, What you said at lunch time…. you know you shouldn't have said that?... You shouldn't say things like that when you don't mean them – it's not fair…."

For a moment Will was taken aback - he was hoping they'd build up to the conversation somehow – not 'boom' and straight into it…

"Mac – what I said…. I meant it… I'm in love with you…."

Mac gulped hearing the words again but she knew she had to keep her head here – she couldn't let sentiment get in the way of truth…

"Shhhh… You didn't mean it…." Mac replied, her voice a little softer than before….. "You don't know what the hell you mean right now Billy…. You're confused… you're still grieving…"

Will reached for her hand again and for a moment he thought she was going to pull away but she didn't…. she let him take it in his…

"Mac… I know what you think this is…. But honestly, I know what I'm feeling …."

Mac shook her head slightly… "I'm not sure do…. You've been through so much in these past ten days and…."

"And it's made everything clear to me – it's made me see what I want in life..." Will interrupted in a soft voice… "Mac, it takes something like this to make me realise what a first class jerk I've been for the past few months…"

Mac took a deep breath and let her head drop…. It was so difficult trying to convince him to change his mind and take back what he said when really, in her hearts of hearts, he was saying what she'd longed to hear for years….

"Life's too short Mac – I've realised that…. Look what happened to Jess – she was so young…. I don't want that – I don't want to miss another day of being with you…. And I know what you're thinking Kenz – I'm not stupid… You're thinking I'm only saying all this because of Sophie? Right?"

Mac was surprised Will had even said that but she nodded her head dejectedly….

"Well… excuse my language but that's a crock of shit… If you don't believe what I'm saying you have to come up with a better reason for not believing me…. I'm not Wade Campbell – I wouldn't use you for something I need… I'm saying it because I've realised just how much you mean to me…. Just how much I want to be with you and just how much I love you…."

"As a friend Will…"

"Yes – as a friend…. But as something more too – something so much more….something like we used to share….."

Will saw more tears creep out of Mackenzie's eyes before she'd even realised they were falling…. He reached forward and pulled her into his arms, desperately wanting to comfort her and desperately wanting to say the right thing… For the first thirty seconds or so Mac was as stiff as a board and hardly moving but as Will gently rubbed her back and shoulders she slowly but surely wrapped her arms around his body, clinging onto him as if her life depended on it….

"Mac… You know I'm not good at these kinds of talks…. I'm trying… But you have to help me here…." Will pleaded…

For a moment she didn't reply but finally she lifted her head from his shoulder… "You can't say that…" Mac whispered as she pulled away from him fully a couple of seconds later… "You can't say like we used to share because that was special Will… That love was special – even if it did take me too long to realise…"

"I know but that's what I feel still…. Don't you understand? It's never gone away…"

"Oh Will…."

Will tenderly tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and let his fingers rest on the side of her cheek…."I know you feel it too Mac… I can see it in your eyes and I can feel it when we touch…."

Mac bit her bottom lip and wiped the tears from her cheeks… She wanted to tell him she felt the same way – that she'd felt that way since the day she'd returned to ACN – or rather since the day she'd left his life years before….

"You know what we had before Mackenzie – how fantastic it was…. Even through everything that happened – those feelings just don't go away…. Believe me I've tried to let them go but the don't - not ever…"

"It's felt like it at times… I can still remember what you said that night Will…."

Will nodded…. "I know and that's because I was a jerk…. Those things I said… All the hell I put you through…. I'm ashamed…"

"I deserved it at the time…" Mac whispered sadly…

"Mackenzie… whatever happened four years ago you don't deserve the crap I've thrown at you since you've been back… I hate my actions so much now when I look back at it… I have a go about the way Campbell treated you but I've been ten times worse…"

"Will… don't…" Mac interrupted as she saw tears in his eyes… "You had every right…"

"No… I'm not playing this game anymore Mac… I love you…." Will said, his voice getting louder… "I want us to be together again and I will do anything to prove that to you – as long as you feel the same…"

Mac felt so utterly confused…. Taking a deep breath, she stood up and made her way over to the window…. Mackenzie had always loved this view from Will's apartment – watching the traffic below was like playing with little matchbox cars when you were a kid in Mac's mind….

As she had suspected, it wasn't long until she felt Will wrap his arms around her from behind as he pressed a tiny kiss to the base of her neck…

"Do you feel the same? Do you love me?" he whispered into her ear, sending shivers up and down her spine…

For a moment Mackenzie wasn't going to reply but she couldn't ignore that question, even with all the doubt she had in her head right now…. She felt her resolve weakening and she knew there and then she could never deny him what he was asking for…

"You know I do…"

She could almost feel Will smile… "Like before? Like that something special we shared before?" Will asked quietly, squeezing her waist and pulling her back so she was flush against him…

Mac lifted her arms and rested them on Will's that were holding onto her waist from behind her and softly whispered "Yes"…

"Then what's stopping us trying again?"

Mackenzie didn't say anything for a while as Will continued to press tiny kisses into her neck… "Mac – if you don't want us to try again then give me a good reason why… Make me understand your fears…."

She waited a moment before she pulled his arms around her even tighter and gripped ahold of his hands….

"Billy… I want to try again – more than you could know… But I'm scared… I'm scared that in a few weeks' time you're going to change your mind in all of this… That you're going to realise just how fine you and Sophie are going to be and you won't need me…."

"Oh Mac… really? That's what you think?"

Will shook his head and rested his head against hers….

"Do you trust me?" he asked a moment later….

"With all my heart…."

"Then believe me when I say that's never going to happen…" Will answered…

"How do you know that?"

"Because it's you I want Mac – I want you as my girlfriend… no – wife – I want you as my wife…. I don't need a makeshift mother – I can hire one of those if I want…. I already know Sophie and I will be just fine on our own….. But I want you…"

Mac couldn't help but grin as she heard his words… "Really?"

"Yes… really…. This feeling isn't new for me Mackenzie… It's always been there – throughout everything that's happened I've loved you…." Will answered quietly…

He loosened his grip on her waist and turned her around in his arms…. Slowly, he leaned forward and pressed his lips tenderly onto Mac's…. A moment into the kiss Will raised his arms and cupped her face in both of his hands increasing the pressure on her lips, loving the sound of the soft moan that escaped her mouth without her even knowing. The kiss was so gentle and so tender that Mackenzie was sure her legs would give way beneath her if she didn't hold onto him… She was trying so hard to keep a straight head when all she wanted to do was fall into his arms forever and never leave them again….

After a minute or so, Will pulled away slightly, smiling at the look of bliss on her face….

"You've always felt it?" She asked, picking up where he'd left off before the kiss

Will nodded… "Always - That's what the message said…"

The moment Will saw a look of confusion appear behind her eyes he wasn't too sure whether bringing up the voicemail right now would help the situation. They hadn't mentioned the message for over three months now but Will realised he had to tell her about it before they ever stood a chance of moving on. After his stint in hospital Mac was asking almost on a daily basis but around Halloween time she had stopped completely and this was the first time it had been mentioned since then… Will watched as it dawned on her what he was saying…..

She shook her head in disbelief and pulled away slightly, running her hand through her hair… If she was honest, Mackenzie wasn't too sure what to think… She loved this man so damn much but sometimes the frustration she felt with him was immense… She had given him so many different ways of telling her what the message had said in the days that followed his release from hospital… She had emailed him, texted him, told him to leave another message, suggested they both share some of his cookies together and talk and she'd even asked Will to get Reese to somehow forward the message on again but each time he had pushed the ideas away… He'd refused time and time again telling her it was unimportant…. How the hell was it unimportant?

Mac felt herself starting to get a little annoyed but she knew this certainly wasn't the time or place for a row – she was too tired and too emotional and she was certain she'd say something she regretted. Without saying another word, Mackenzie pulled herself out of Will's arms and made her way over to where her shoes were abandoned…

Will watched with almost a look of horror on his face…. "Kenz?"

"You're an idiot at times…" Mac replied, slipping her feet into her shoes…

"I know…."

"Will, I can't do this message thing right now…" she said, waving her arms in the air…

"Where you going?…."

"I need to go home… I'm tired…"

"No – not until this is sorted…." Will said with his voice raised, his desperation to keep her there very evident…

"Will, how many times did I give you a chance to tell me what that bloody message said?"

"I know… But…."

"You said it was un-important – how the fuck is it un-important?"

Her voice was raised and her face was getting redder by the moment…. Just as Will was about to answer her they both heard gentle sobs coming from Sophie's room and stopped dead in their tracks… Will stared at Mac and then at the door to Sophie's room – knowing if he attended to Sophie then Mac would most definitely go home while he was in there.

The sobs started to get louder as both of them just stared at each other…. Finally, Mac took a deep breath…. "Sophie needs you…" she said, nodding her head towards the door….

Will swallowed and felt a rush of nerves through his body…. He hadn't once been able to deal with Sophie when she had cried – the only person who had been able to stop her each time was Mackenzie….

"Mac - Come with me – she always stops for you…" Will whispered, walking towards Mac…

Mac shook her head…. "Will - go tend to her – you'll be fine…"

"I will… But please don't leave… not yet…" Will begged as he walked past Mackenzie and into Sophie's room where the sobs had turned into full blown tears…

While Will tended to Sophie, Mac made her way over to the sofa and plonked herself down on it, burying her head in her hands – half tempted to run but realising she really wanted to work this through with Will…. She'd run out on him once before and look where that led to – there was no way she was making that mistake again.

She sat for two or three minutes listening to the cries from the bedroom and listening to Will's efforts to calm Sophie before she stood up and wandered to the bedroom door. Will had Sophie in his arms, chatting away to her soothingly but still she carried on crying… Mac made her way over the bed and switched the lamp on…

"What's wrong?" she asked, noticing Will's red, anxious face….

Will shook his head and quickly placed a kiss to Sophie's cheek… "She's half awake, half asleep.." Will whispered… "She keeps asking for Mummy…" he said, the frustration clearly showing on his face.…. "Why does she keep asking for Mummy?"

"Shhh…" Mac said – trying to sooth Will as well as Sophie…. She sat on the edge of the bed next to Will and felt Sophie's forehead, before she stroked the top of the little girls head… "She doesn't feel like she's got a temperature or anything…. Maybe she's just having a bad dream…."

Will looked up at Mackenzie, his eyes pleading with her to help somehow…

"You're doing great Will… Just be patient and keep rocking her gently… She'll go back to sleep soon…" Mac whispered, all earlier angry thoughts disappearing fast as she watched him trying so hard to comfort Sophie…

"I'm not cut out for this Mac – I can't handle it when she cries…" Will said, peppering Sophie's head with kisses but still the cries didn't stop… "Please Mac… You can always stop her tears…."

Not able to refuse his pleading and hating the sound of Sophie's tears, Mac kicked off her shoes and shuffled backwards on the bed until she was leaning against the headboard…. She opened her arms and Will lifted Sophie into them and then instantly stood and started pacing the room… "What's wrong with her?" Will asked as Mac tried to soothe her tears…. "Do you think she's sick?"

"Will - Calm down… she's probably just had a bad dream…. I don't think it's anything more…"

Will nodded and sat down on the end of the bed as watched as Mac whispered into Sophie's ear and kissed her gently….

"How about you fix us a drink? I'd love a cup of tea…" Mac whispered a moment later to Will, giving him something to do more than actually wanting a cup of tea…

Will nodded and disappeared from the room in a flash… While he was gone Mac started to sing softly to Sophie trying to soothe and comfort the little girl as she rocked her back to sleep. By the time Will appeared back with a mug of tea five minutes later Sophie was sound asleep in Mac's arms with a serene smile on her sleeping face. He placed the tea on Sophie's bedside table and shook his head in disbelief…

"Has she got an on/off switch that you've found and I don't know about?" Will asked, Mackenzie's proud smile melting him…

Mac giggled quietly…. "I don't think I can move right now mind – I think I'm stuck here for the night!"

"How did you stop her?"

Mac shook her head and placed another kiss to Sophie's head…. "I think it's just the female thing… She's used to a female comforting her… I don't know really…. Mind you, I did sing to her…."

Will chuckled and held his hands up…. "You sang? I'm not commenting in case I get myself in even more trouble!"

Mac giggled again and Will perched on the edge of the bed… "You want me to lift her? Lay her down?"

"Not for the moment." Mac answered… "Let her fall into a deeper sleep…."

Neither said anything for a few moments, both of them just watching Sophie as she slept…. Finally, Mac looked up at Will, now determined to finish this talk tonight….

"What did the rest of the message actually say?" She finally asked, feeling calmer and with a look of fresh hope on her face…

Will took a deep breath and sighed…. "You really want to do this here? Now?"

"She's asleep…" Mac said, looking down at Sophie still in her arms… "It's a good a time as ever…"

Will sighed again - this was hardly the way he had envisioned telling her the message after all this time but he couldn't risk not telling her everything now….

"Okay…. Look you have to let me finish before you say anything okay…?"

Mac nodded and with one hand, still around Sophie's back she picked up her tea and took a sip….

"You also have to remember I was high here Kenz… okay? The first part of the message wasn't exactly genius of me…."

"Will just get on with it…" Mac whispered, her patience running short already….

Will took another deep breath…. "Okay… I'm just gonna say it all in one go… It said… 'Hi – it's me… Will…. Listen I swear I'm not saying this because I'm high and if the answer is no then just do me a favour and don't call me back or bring it up or anything but I have to tell you I mean after tonight…. I really want to tell you that I've never stopped loving you….."

Will paused to take a moment to check everything was okay…. When Mac smiled he carried on…. "Even after everything we've been through together Mac, after the break up and you being back here… I still love you… I love you like I've always loved you… What we've had has always been so special Mackenzie and I wondered whether – if I said I was sorry for being a jerk – that you'd give us another try… Anyway… call me back Kenz – if you want to….'"

Halfway through the second part, Mac had placed her mug back on the bedside table and sat up straight, reaching for his hand as best she could with Sophie still in her arms… When he'd finished Mac wasn't sure whether she wanted to laugh, cry or hit him but it was just beginning to dawn on her that maybe today's lunch time message was really meant – maybe he had loved her all along and this wasn't just because of Sophie… She noticed the tears in his eyes and she knew they probably matched her own right now….

"You thought I didn't call you back because I didn't want to try again?" Mac whispered – her face showing utter horror at what Will must have thought over those months…. "Oh Billy…."

Will nodded and shook his head…. "I'm sorry it's taken me so long to tell you again…" Will whispered, still terrified at what her reaction would be…. "I should have said something before…. But it was just so damn hard….."

For a full minute Mac didn't say a word… she felt Will squeezing her hand, rubbing her hand and Mackenzie felt all her earlier anger melting away – especially when she looked into his eyes and saw the love shining back at her… It was the kind of look she'd been used to seeing every single day years ago when they were together….

"Mac?"

Slowly she bought her eyes up to meet his and shook her head slowly…. "You're such a bloody idiot you know that?"

Will didn't even try to disagree with her – he knew she was right and he knew she had every right to be angry although at that moment he could tell her anger was disappearing fast…

"Will – that's not even the kind of thing you say on a phone call – let alone a voicemail message? That's the kind of thing you say banging someone's door down if you wanted to tell them that?"

"It was midnight and I was high – I wasn't exactly thinking straight...…." Will answered weakly, knowing he sounded pathetic but not having any other answer…

"I wouldn't have cared less Billy…. Don't you know that? I wouldn't have cared what time it was if you were saying you loved me… Don't you realise that's what I've wanted to hear…. I've dropped enough hints over the past year….."

Will nodded and let his head drop slightly as Sophie started to stir in Mac's arms…. Mac gently stroked Sophie's hair and Will took the chance to inch closer to her…. He leaned in and dropped the softest of kisses to Sophie's head and then, praying she wouldn't pull away he pressed a long kiss to Mac's lips…

Will thanked his lucky starts that she didn't move – infact she applied more pressure and kissed him back hungrily… Taking advantage of the situation, he inched even closer to her and pulled her into his arms as much as he could with a sleeping four year old wedged between them.

"I love you, Mackenzie…. I really do…."

He felt her spare arm reach up and start to rub his back gently as she mumbled something into his shoulder – something he couldn't quite figure out.…

"What did you say?" he whispered a moment later…

Mac pulled away slightly and kissed him lightly on the lips…. A happy smile spread across her face before she rested her forehead on his… "I said I still think you're a bloody idiot… but I love you too – I love you with all my heart…"

Will couldn't help but grin as he heard the words "I love you" fall from her mouth….. He pulled his forehead away from Mac's and smiled again as his eyes met hers…

"You know what…" Will whispered…"As much as I love this little girl – I have to get her out of your arms… I can hardly kiss you properly with her stuck between us!"

Mac giggled, mainly at the look of urgency and frustration on his face….

Will slowly let go of her hand, grinning all the time as he lifted Sophie ever so gently, giving Mac room to slide out of the bed… The moment she was on her feet Mac pulled back the covers allowing Will to lay Sophie back into bed. Once the little girl was settled, Mac leant down to drop a soft kiss on Sophie's head and pulled the duvet up over her and then taking her hand in his, Will led them out of the bedroom and back over to the sofa and together they fell into each other's arms with whispers of love falling from their lips.


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry for the delay on this folks - had a bit of a block on this while writing this chapter but I know where I'm going again with it!**

**Thanks for the replies - I love to read what you think!**

**Hope you enjoy this... xx**

* * *

"I love you…" Will whispered for what must have been the fiftieth time in the past hour that they'd been cuddled together on the sofa…. "Did I tell you that?"

"Maybe once or twice…" Mac giggled snuggling further into him…. "But you can say it again if you want – I've waited long enough to hear it!"

"Better late than never eh?…" Will whispered as he cupped her cheek and chuckled to himself – loving the totally silly feeling that had come over him of not being able to wipe the grin off his face…

"What's funny?" Mac asked, sitting up slightly and lazily trailing her finger down his face, letting it come to rest on his jaw…

"Nothing…. I'm just struggling to take all this in – being here with you… finally kissing you - just because I can!"

"Finally?" she questioned pressing her lips to the underside of his jaw….

"Yeah – finally…" Will replied…. "I've been dreaming about this moment since the day you walked back into my life two years ago…"

"You had a funny way of showing it sometimes..."

"Yeah – I know… "Please don't remind me about it – it's not my finest hour…" Will said, constantly appalled with himself lately at how he had treated the woman he was in love with….

Mac sighed, still feeling slightly lightheaded from the events of the day and his words of love that he was constantly whispering… She leant in and kissed him again and then again and then again– so grateful to finally have him in her arms once more…

"You do know we could have been like this for nearly a year if you'd told me how you felt in person – rather than leaving that damn voicemail!?"

Will wrapped his arms tightly around her shoulders and squeezed hard… "I've got a feeling you're not going to let me forget that eh?"

"Eventually I will!…. Just promise me we'll do better at this communicating lark from now on…."

"I promise…" Will replied, his voice cracking with emotion…

Mac looked up as she heard the crack in his voice and had to take a sharp intake of breath – just from the look of love that was shining back at her from Will's eyes… Somewhere in the back of her mind she was still doubtful over everything that had happened today but that was just her way – she had brainwashed herself for the past few years that he would never look at her that way again and now he actually was - well it was just something that she was going to have to get used to it again. It would just take time though…

Mac snuck a look at the clock and although she didn't want to move from his arms she knew she had to get home… The events of the past two weeks and the lack of decent sleep was starting to cause too many problems for her aching mind and body – she couldn't handle another tearful day tomorrow or another night slept on a sofa and she certainly wasn't ready to jump into bed with Will tonight – not like this…

"Please don't think about giong…" Will whined, his grip on Mackenzie's arm tightening…

Mac giggled and sat up slightly… "How did you even know that's what I was thinking?"

"You forget I can read you like a book Mac…" He whispered, trying to pull her back on top of him…

"Will, you promised me my own bed tonight…" Mac reminded him… "And an early night…"

"I know… but that was - you know – before…. I thought you'd stay here with me now…."

Mac sat upright and took a hold of Will's hand…. "Will please… I don't want to rush this… not for your sake or mine or most importantly Sophie's…."

Mac felt guilty at the look of disappointment that instantly appeared on Will's face but she knew she was right and she knew she had to be strong here…

"But we slept in the same bed recently - you know - the night I came back after Jess..." he tried to reason...

"That was different Billy and you know it... Look - soon okay? I just want to make certain we're both sure about this before Sophie finds me wrapped in your arms in the morning!"

"I'm sure…" Will whispered, his lips finding the underside of her jaw….

"And so am I Will… but… let's not rush this okay? One step at a time – remember?"

"I thought that was just about Sophie?"

"It was… but now it's about us too!..." Mac joked, kissing his lips lightly… "Come on Will – you know I'm talking sense here…."

Will sighed and leant back against the sofa pulling Mackenzie with him and wrapping his arms tightly around her…. He closed his eyes for a moment realising that she was probably right here but desperately not wanting to admit that to her. He knew he sounded petulant but he just wanted to take her to bed, make love to her and hold her all night long - sounds pretty pathetic when you compare that to the feelings of a little four year old girl who had recently lost her mother and moved to a big city with her Uncle.

"Come on, don't sulk Will… I want to – you know that… it's just not the right time tonight…"

Will opened his eyes as he felt Mac's hand gently stroke his cheek… One look at her face and he had to admit she was right – she looked so exhausted and she looked so concerned anyway… Maybe it was a tad too soon he conceded...

"Okay…" he whispered, his eyes unable to leave hers… "You're right…."

"Aren't I always?" Mac giggled, biting her bottom lip and looking as adorable as always to Will…

"But promise me we won't wait too long though?" Will pleaded…

"Promise…" Mac whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into her for what turned out to be the start of a very long goodnight…

* * *

The following day at work was definitely a vast improvement to the previous day – if Will had been there Mackenzie could say it was almost normal. Mac had actually felt like she was in control again during the pitch meeting and although Don & Elliott were still in control of the actual broadcast in the evening until Will returned, Mackenzie felt like she was finally getting back on track workwise.

It was amazing what a full night's sleep in your own bed would do Mac thought to herself as she checked her watch for what must have been the fiftieth time in the last hour. She had promised Will that they'd go to lunch again and if she was honest she couldn't wait for him & Sophie to arrive.

As if on cue, Mackenzie heard a knock on the door and looked up to see Sophie & Will at her office door, their hands gripped tightly in each other's and both with big smiles across their faces…

"Hey…. There's my two rays of sunshine…" Mac said, getting up and holding her arms out to Sophie who let go of Will's hand and ran into Mac's arms immediately….

Will watched on from the office door, his heart swelling in his chest each time he saw these two girls together… As Mackenzie finally put Sophie back down onto her feet he made his way over and gently pressed a kiss to her lips… "Good Morning… You sleep okay?"

"Like a log when you finally let me off the phone Billy…. You?" Mac replied...

"Good thanks – until I got tickled at 6am this morning by a little monster…"Will said, winking at Sophie….

"I missed you though…" Will added quietly, leaning in for another kiss….

Mac smiled and shook her head slightly…. "I missed you too…"

"How' it going here?" he asked, changing the subject as he noticed Sophie gazing up at the two of them…

Mac blushed slightly and nodded her head… "Slowly! But much better than yesterday - thank God!"

Will smiled and looked down at Sophie who was trying to grab something out of his hand hidden behind his back…

"What are you two up to?" Mac said, looking at them both suspiciously…

"Well…." Will said, producing a big bunch of flowers from behind his back… "Sophie & I wanted to say thank you, didn't we Soph?" Will said, looking very chuffed with himself…

"Thank you? What on earth for?" Mackenzie asked, touched by the gesture but really not knowing why…

"For just being here with us…" Will answered, "for looking after us both the last little while - we don't know what we'd do without you..…"

"Oh Will…" Mac whispered but was the tender moment was soon interrupted as Sophie jumped up and down excitedly and took the flowers from Will's hand to give to Mac…

"Uncle Billy said I could pick the colour…" the little girl announced proudly… "So I picked yellow..."

"Oh Soph – they're gorgeous…." Mac said bending down a placing a big kiss on Sophie's cheek… "How did you know yellow is my favourite colour for flowers eh?"

"Because it's the colour of Belle's dress!" Sophie said, as if it were the most obvious answer in the world….

Mac stole a look at Will as he shrugged his shoulders… "Why else?" he whispered, chuckling… "You do know we're going to have yellow everything until her Beauty and The Beast crush passes!"

"They're beautiful Will…" Mac whispered, placing her hand on his arm…. "Thank you…"

Will smiled and leant in close to Mac and whispered… "Hey – how comes she gets a kiss when all she did was pick the colour? You know I paid for them right? I don't get a kiss?"

Mac shook her head and smiled coyly at him, before leaning in and pressing a long kiss to his lips, not caring who could possibly see them from the newsroom and not even caring that Sophie was probably watching them either… She pulled away a moment later when she heard Sophie giggling and almost smirked at the breathless look on Will's face…

"Better?" she asked, grinning….

"Much…" Will whispered, pulling the chair out and sitting down… "I think we need to buy Mac flowers more often Soph…"

Feeling Sophie pull on her arm Mac placed the flowers on the side of her desk and then sat at her desk chair and lifted Sophie up onto her lap… "So what did you two monsters have for breakfast this morning? More eggs and marching soldiers?"

Sophie giggled at the look on Mac's face and shook her head… "Coco Pops!" she squealed excitedly…

"Wow… Coco Pops?" she replied, trying to sound as excited as Sophie... "Chocolate for breakfast?" she muttered looking at Will…

"It's not chocolate – it's brown cereal isn't it Pumpkin?" Will replied…

Sophie nodded so very seriously….

"I'm sure if it's brown then it's like wholemeal or something…" Will said winking at Sophie… "It's just like brown bread – much healthier right Mac?"

"I think eggs and soldiers are better for you Will!…"

Will chuckled at Mac's attempted stern look and shook his head… "Mac – you have to work on cross face if you're gonna try it on us….. It's not working too well!"

"Hey…. I had the most excellent idea this morning…." Will continued, changing the subject and sitting up straight in his chair…

"Well, that's doesn't happen very often…" Mac replied, grabbing some paper from her drawer and some pencils for Sophie…

"Very funny Kenz – only this time I think you'll agree I'm a genius…"

"Come on then – tell me your genuisness…"

"Mac – is that even a word?... Anyway, we were getting ready to come out this morning and Rosa was there cleaning… She got on like a house on fire with Sophie – they were chatting and Soph was helping Rosa to dust and I suddenly thought… Why can't Rosa be Sophie's child minder/Nanny when she goes to school?"

"Does she do that sort of thing?" Mac asked, wrapping her arms around Sophie's waist and resting her chin on her shoulder as the little girl continued to scribble on the paper…

"Well – she's got three kids of her own – all much older now and Mac – I much prefer someone I know and more importantly someone I trust… I can't bear the thought of Soph being with a stranger after school"

"Do you think she'd do it? It's longer hours than she does for you now isn't it?"

"I mentioned it to her and she seemed keen - she said she'd give up her other cleaning jobs and just do this one... We even talked about a salary….. but I said I had to run it by you of course first…."

"Will – you don't have to run it by me… This is your thing…"

Will sighed and took a deep breath before he stood and strolled over to the window… He gazed down below for a minute before calling Mac over to him, wanting to talk where Sophie couldn't hear… Mackenzie stood and plopped Sophie back down in her big desk chair and pushed it right into the desk…

"Look Mac – this is 'our' thing not mine… What we spoke about last night – we're gonna be together right?"

"Of course" Mac answered leaning backwards against the wall and window so she could keep her eye on Sophie…

"We're not sixteen anymore Mac – this time we both know it's going to be forever right?"

"Yes… of course…"

"Then it's our decision Mac – not mine… Sophie's going to be as much under your control and guidance as mine in the future…"

"But she's not my niece Will – she's yours… Jess left her in your care…."

"Kenz – she's bound to think of you as her Mother figure – you've got to accept that or this is never going to work…"

Mac took a deep breath and sighed and reached for Will's hand…

"I thought you liked it – you know… looking after her with me?" Will said, suddenly looking unsure of everything…

"Oh I do - I really do…" Mac assured him instantly… "I love it Will… I just…"

"What?"

"I don't know… it just feels like…. Look - I don't want to take over Will - you're her official guardian…."

Will waited for a moment and then pulled her into him, his arms automatically coming to rest around her waist… "Mackenzie – you're not taking over darling… Yes – I'm her guardian but can't you see that we both want you in our lives full time?... You've been our saviour the past two weeks and we want you with us every day? Come on - it works with the three of us together right? You're the part of us that is missing at the moment - We want you there in the morning when we wake up and we want you there with us all day – both of us… You would never be taking over – you'd be part of our family… That's all the both of us want – You!…"

Mac felt the tears of yesterday start to well again in her eyes again – how the hell this man managed to turn her into an emotional wreck quite so easily Mac would never know…. Will leant in and pressed the softest of kisses to her lips before he pulled away….

"I don't want to pressure you Mac - just promise me you'll think about it yeah?" he asked with a look so tender and so hopeful on his face…

Mac nodded and leant in for another kiss…. "I promise…" she whispered quietly, trying to assure him with a smile…

"Okay... Look - I thought I'd go talk to the troops - see what they're working on kind of thing…. Can I leave Soph with you for half an hour then we'll go to lunch?"

Mac nodded as she cupped his face between both her hands… "I do love you Will - you and Sophie…" she whispered, tracing her finger along his lips…

"I know honey…" Will replied… "We love you too! You just have to believe us!"

Mac giggled and pulled away making her way back to her desk as Will headed to the door…

"Hey Soph," Will shouted, once he got to the door… "I'm just going to talk to the guys outside – you stay here and look after Mac okay?"

Sophie nodded happily not really caring too much where Will went now that she had Mac sitting next to her again…

"And hey" Will added… "No telling Kenzie that we had left over chocolate cake for breakfast with our Coco Pops – she won't be impressed!"

Will just about managed to sneak a look at Mac's stunned face as he pulled the door closed… All he could hear as he walked away was the delightful sound of his two girls chatting and giggling…

* * *

"Hey, dinner's almost ready…" Will whispered from the door of Sophie's room, watching Mac as she just gazed lovingly at Sophie sleeping….

As Don was producing Mac had managed to get away early from work again and headed straight over to Will's apartment from the Office – Sloan had tried to persuade her to go for drinks but Mac had to admit to herself she just wanted to be with Will and Sophie at the moment. Once there, she had volunteered for bath and bedtime duties while Will had started to prepare dinner – much the better option in Mac's opinion!

There had been much laughing and squealing as Sophie and Mac had played with the set of very big rubber ducks Will had bought Sophie earlier, especially when they had managed to completely soak Will as he'd popped his head round the bathroom door to see what the laughter was about… Then had followed the reading of Beauty & The Beast for the sixth night in a row! Mac had worked hard trying to convince Sophie they should read something else but apparently it had to be beautiful Belle & Beasty!

"You okay darling?" Will asked creeping up behind Mac and resting his hand on her shoulder…

"She's so adorable Will…" Mac muttered…. "I have absolutely no idea how she's coping so well with all this change but she is – she carries on with her little life… it's almost as if nothing's changed in her world….."

"I read something online today that said kids her age cope much better than older kids – in a way she's so young that it will be easier for her to accept and adjust than say an eight year old child would accept it…" Will whispered, careful not to wake Sophie…

"Even still… I can't believe how well she's taken to living here…. Mind you, I think she's got her Uncle Will twisted round her little finger… Coco Pops and Chocolate cake for breakfast!" Mac giggled, raising her eyebrow at him?…

"Yeah well… Thought I'd take the big brother approach…. I find it easier than a fatherly approach…"

"Don't sell yourself short Billy… You're being an amazing parent with her…. Better than I ever imagined…"

"Really?" Will asked looking genuinely surprised…

"Yep - easily… You're a natural!"

Will smiled to himself seemingly thrilled with what Mac was saying… He rested his hand on the back of Mac's head before gently stroking her hair…

"So are you…" he whispered a moment later, causing Mac to turn her head up to him, a shocked look on her face… "You are Kenz – you can tell that by the way Sophie is with you… She must have asked for you at least fifty times today…."

Mac chuckled and patted the bed next to her for Will to sit…. "I think she just likes it all three of us together… When you went to talk to the team she kept asking for you too..."

"I agree with her…" Will said as he perched on the bed next to Mac….

"Huh?" Mac questioned…

"I like it when it's all three of us together…"

"So do I…" she whispered grinning at Will, quickly deciding she didn't even want to hide that from him any longer… She had been thinking about what he'd said all afternoon but still there was a nagging feeling that she shouldn't be Sophie's replacement mother…

"I can't be her Mother Will…" Mac said softly a moment later… "What you said at lunch time – Jess is her Mother and always will be…"

"That's not what I said Kenz – and definitely not what I meant… Of course Jess is always going to be her Mother – I'll make damn sure Sophie always knows that but you can be her Mother figure… Just like I can be her Father figure… We're not her parents Mac but we're the next best thing she's got…."

"We're the only thing she's got…" Mac whispered sadly…

Both sat quietly in the dimly lit room for a few moments before Will wrapped his arm around Mac's waist loosely and sighed… "I took Soph to the park again this afternoon and I was thinking – it's only been what – a week we've been living together but it's changed everything so much already… This time two weeks ago I was a grumpy old bachelor and now… now I feel happier than I have for years, younger than I have for years and I truly couldn't imagine my life without you two in it…"

"I know…" Mac replied… "How quickly things change…"

"I got annoyed with myself for waiting so long with you Mac – I've wasted so much time… I've been such an idiot these past couple of years and I can't apologise enough to you…"

Mac twisted her head so she could see Will properly…. "We were getting there without Sophie though weren't we Will?"

"What do you mean?"

"If Sophie hadn't of come along… Would we have still ended up here? Would we be together?"

"Hey... of course we would…" Will whispered, leaning in for a kiss… "I told you about the message… I've been wanting this for months now – I was just too chicken to do anything about it…"

"I just don't want this to go wrong this time Will - I wouldn't survive another break up with you…"

"It wont - I'm certain of it Mac…"

Will shook his head and squeezed his arms around Mac a little tighter when she didn't respond…. "I'm lucky to have you Mackenzie… I don't know what the hell I've done to deserve you but I'm grateful to get this second chance with you – truly grateful…."

He smiled as he heard Mac sigh and he sighed happily with her, closing his eyes for a moment and enjoying these few seconds of utter peace and tranquillity with his two girls so close by…

"I always knew you'd be an amazing Father…" Mac suddenly whispered a couple of moments later… She pulled herself up from his shoulder and turned herself around fully so she was facing him… "I've thought it ever since you first spoke with me about wanting kids all those years ago…. You're so natural with her Will…

"C'mere you…" Will whispered as he pulled Mackenzie into him for a hug…. Mac didn't hesitate and wrapped her arms around him so tightly, relishing the feeling of him being so close to her….

"Jess would be so very proud of you Billy…" Mac mumbled into his shoulder…

"I hope so…" Will replied, burying his head against the side of Mac's…. "I really hope so…"

It was only when Mac's stomach rumbled a couple of minutes later that Will pulled away slightly and looked at Mac - his face showing so much emotion and love that it pulled at Mac's heartstrings….

"Come on darling - Let's go eat…" Will whispered, pulling her up off the bed with him…. He crept the couple of feet to the head of Sophie's bed and leant down and pressed the softest of kisses onto his niece's forehead…

"Sweet dreams pumpkin… sweet dreams…." Will whispered, kissing Sophie again….

As Mac watched while he gently pushed Ginger bear into her arms and tucked the duvet snugly around her tiny body, she once again cursed how she had ever managed to let this man go from her life. If she hadn't have been quite so stupid that could be their own children that they put to bed together each night as well as Sophie and, although she had never admitted it to Will, she'd dreamt of that moment since he first mentioned kids to her all those years before. She'd dreamt of a little boy with blonde floppy hair playing baseball with his Father in the park, she'd dreamt of a little girl - just like Sophie - who would be the apple of her Father's eye and she'd dreamt of happy family Christmas's and Happy Thanksgiving's - dreams that she'd managed to throw away just through her own stupid, miserable mistakes.

But not any more. He loved her again and she loved him more than she ever knew was possible. They could really do this this time around - they could really find a happy ever after and maybe they could find a happy ever after that included giving Sophie a little cousin to grow up with.

Now that would be just perfect as far as Mackenzie was concerned.


	13. Chapter 13

During the next couple of months everything seemed to fall right into place for Will, Mackenzie & Sophie.

Will & Mac took a very excited little girl to visit her new school on the first Friday she was in New York and by the following Wednesday Sophie was kitted out in her smart new uniform and found herself being taken to school by an extremely nervous Will & Mackenzie. That day had been a torrid few hours for the whole of the News Night team with both Will & Mac highly on edge for most of the day…. It was only when Rosa bought Sophie into the Office for a couple of hours that afternoon that everyone could finally relax a little as it seems Sophie had had the time of her life at school! She may have had a great day but there was nearly an accident as the little girl raced across the newsroom to throw herself into Will's arms and then Mac's when she'd arrived – never before had three people been so glad to see each other! Sophie then spent the next two hours telling anyone who would listen, everything she'd done during the day and that she couldn't wait to get back to school the next day.

It hadn't take long for them all to settle into the daily routines that would allow Will & Mac to take care of Sophie full time and still remain on the ACN prime time slot. As much as Will & Mac adored their work they had both already decided they would give up News Night and take a lesser daytime slot if it meant they couldn't fit Sophie into the work routine. Will had laid the facts out fairly to Charlie during a lunch his first week back at work but Charlie wouldn't hear of any change – he wasn't prepared to lose either of his prize assets – that and it secretly delighted him to see Sophie bring laughter and joy into his Newsroom every afternoon.

So – their routine… Will would get Sophie up and ready and take her to school every morning while Mac started off the day early at ACN with the team. Will made it in each day by ten and the team would go through their day as normal. Every afternoon at around half past three Rosa would bring Sophie into the Newsroom and she'd sit quietly next to Will, usually colouring, while Mackenzie ran the afternoon meetings before spending the next hour in either Will or Mac's office – whoever was the less busy! At six, when the final meeting before the show started she would say her goodbyes and leave with Rosa to get home and settled in time for Will & Mac to call her at bedtime at seven on the dot. Friday was the only day that was different – Friday was special treat day as none of them had to get up early the following morning. On a Friday, Sophie would be allowed to stay for the whole evening, right up until the show finished so she could go home with Will & Mac and Rosa could spend an evening with her own family. She usually ended up sleeping through the broadcast under the watchful eye of one of the team members, but to Will & Mac it meant that it was one less day that Rosa put her to bed and one day more of the week that they got that pleasure.

In Will & Mac's mind it wasn't ideal but it was as good a compromise as they could hope for. More importantly it seemed to be working well - Sophie had enjoyed her first two months at school and seemed to be doing very well and for Will & Mackenzie it allowed their professional lives to carry on pretty much as normal. As for Sophie – she was loving life at the Newsroom – she had made firm friends with Maggie & Jim in particular and she seemed to have the whole team wrapped around her little finger – even her Uncle Charlie who had taken a real shine to the little girl and sometimes took her out for a milkshake if Will & Mackenzie were particularly busy with a story.

Everything between Will & Mac was going along smoothly – slowly – but still very smoothly. Mac had stayed over for the famous sleepover the first weekend that Sophie moved up and, as promised, the trio enjoyed Eggs & Marching soldiers for breakfast before they took on the task of painting Sophie's room. That was a day that would stay in Will's memory bank for many a year to come. The sight of both Mac & Sophie dressed in huge old t-shirts of his and painting was just pure entertainment for him – by the time the first wall was painted there seemed to be more paint on the two girls than there actually was on the wall! And of course, as he'd picked up a paint brush to help they ganged up on him in their usual way. Will made the mistake of saying he at least would stay clean from paint and it wasn't long before the two girls had tickled him to the floor and while Mac sat on him to hold him down Sophie had wiped her very yellow little fingers all over him - apparently you had to have a yellow face to be part of the painting gang Mac had explained later, once Sophie had gone to bed and Will and Mac shared a relaxing bath.

Will marvelled time and again over the friendship that had developed between Sophie & Mackenzie. It was as if they were both adults and had been best friends their whole life – not just knowing each other for three months. They seemed to just have that special connection – Mac could figure what Sophie wanted or needed within seconds whereas Will still felt like he was fumbling around in the dark sometimes trying to work out what Sophie was talking about! Will often joked with Mac that it was just because she had the mental age of a five year old at times but inside he knew it was just the two of them had fallen completely in love with each other from day one. He still had to get Mac to fully admit to that but he knew it would happen soon – he could sense her falling more and more every day.

As for Will, he truly couldn't remember a happier time in his life… He was utterly smitten with Sophie and the way the little girl had settled in was so remarkable – she had fitted into his life and his routine so easily and although the sad circumstances of how Sophie came to be with him were still most evident to him he thanked whoever above had sent him Sophie at this point in his life. In his more melancholy times, usually after a scotch or two in the evenings, he would wonder if this was all part of a great plan from up above - this little angel being given to him and straightening his life out – bringing everything into place.

The only down side to life – if you could call it a down side – was their living arrangements….. Will was still desperately trying to persuade Mac to move in permanently but Mac was still taking the time to pace it all out. She stayed most weekends from Friday night right through to Monday morning so the three of them could be together but during the week she would head back to her own apartment each night after the show. As much as Will longed for her to move in full time he couldn't really complain too much – Mac had always been the type to take a while to get used to a certain situations – especially personal situations - and he just thanked his lucky stars they were together as they were. They were very much in love, they were happy and it really looked like this would be the real deal this time around - he knew it was just a matter of time before they were finally all a proper family.

All in all - he felt truly blessed with his life these days.

* * *

It was a Saturday Morning – was there a better morning of the week? Will stretched and rolled over in bed, his arm automatically searching for Sophie who had made a bit of a habit of sneaking into his room in the early hours of the morning… Will knew he shouldn't let it turn into too much of a habit but it really was very difficult to send her back to her own bed at these times - her cheeky little smile and her constant chatter were actually quite a nice way to start the day he'd come to realise.

As his arm hit the bed the other side though and not a tiny body he sat up straight – she was definitely there when he had woken a few hours ago… He glanced at the clock on the nightstand and by the time he'd realised it was nearly ten am he was already in a major panic as to what had happened to Soph and just how she'd let him stay asleep this long. He jumped out of bed far too quickly for a fifty two year old man but by the time he was half way across his bedroom he heard that familiar chatter that could only mean one thing…. Mackenzie was here!

He strolled into the lounge area and watched, un-noticed for a moment, as Mackenzie and Sophie chatted on together about god knows what – he could hear the odd word but at times he really did think they had a language of their own…

"Ahhh – Here he is Soph…" Mac giggled, looking up at Will's adorably sleepy face….

"Mr Sleepy Head!" Sophie added, giggling along with Mac and jumping to her feet and rushing to Will to give him a hug…

"We were wondering if you were ever going to wake up?" Mac joked…. "Soph said we were going to have to tickle you awake if you slept much longer!"

"And she's way too good at tickling me awake!" Will chuckled as he bent down and pressed a kiss to the top of Sophie's head before plopping down next to Mac on the sofa…

"Good Morning gorgeous…" Mac whispered as he leant across and kissed her lips…

"How long have you been here Kenz?"

"A couple of hours… But I thought I'd let you sleep in as it's a Saturday!" Mac said a moment later… "You've earnt it lately…"

"Have you slept at all Mackenzie?"

It had been a particularly hectic week at work this week and Mac had been picking up a lot of the slack so Will could get away home to Sophie each night… Although he had been doing his fair share from the laptop at home, when he'd gone to bed at half past twelve last night Mac was still in her office saying that she'd head back to her own apartment soon so not to disturb him and Sophie… He had told her firmly to get home or he was going to send security to clear her out but knowing her she had probably stayed another hour at least…

"Honestly Mac - you need to sleep – you have to accept you're not super human these days…"

"I slept…"

"Yeah! But for how long? Two or three hours isn't enough…."

Mac had figured out pretty early into their relationship the last time around that the easiest way to shut him up most of the time was to kiss him – a plan that still worked to this day…

She pulled away from his lips a moment or two later and trailed her fingers down his cheek..….

"I slept – I promise…" she whispered as she curled her legs under herself and leant against his side…

"What are you two girls up to already?" Will asked, throwing his arm around Mackenzie's shoulder and pulling her to his side…

"Well, we've already done the new Beauty & the Beast jigsaw – we're onto Snow White now…" Mac said, letting her hand rest on his thigh… "We were just figuring out who all the dwarves were…. We reckon Jim is Bashful and…"

"Hey…" Will interrupted… "If you two had me down as Grumpy then there's a tickling war about to start" Will said, winking at Sophie who was sitting on the floor and nudging her with his foot….

"Would we?" Mac replied… "Who did we say Uncle Billy was Soph?"

"Sleepy!" Sophie shouted, in her usual excitable way…

"Ah well – that's okay then… Who were you pumpkin?"

"Happy!" Sophie answered, giggling and looking at Mac…

"Yeah – that sounds about perfect… What about Mac – Was she Grumpy?"

"Nooooo silly…." Sophie squealed just as Mackenzie let out a couple of big sneezes… "Uncle Charlie is Grumpy - Kenzie wanted to be Dopey..…"

Will looked across at Mac's face, thinking she looked so weary right now… "You okay?"

"I'm fine…" Mac replied… "That's perfect timing though – it gets me off from Dopey and onto Sneezy at least!" she said nodding to the puzzle and giggling…

Will looked concerned as she sneezed again and rubbed her temples… "Kenz – are you sick?"

"No – course not… it's just a couple of sneezes…"

"Which is most unlike you – plus you look exhausted…"

"Oh shush…" Mac said, pulling herself up and off the sofa…. "I can't be sick – Sophie and I have a big day shopping ahead of us… Come on Soph – If we're lucky, Uncle Sleepy will make us breakfast while we get you dressed…."

"Shopping?" Will said, raising his eyebrow at Mac…

"Yup – girls only I'm afraid…" Mac said, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss to his lips… "Oh & don't pull that face Will… You know what day tomorrow is!"

Will smiled and pulled Mac down onto his lap as Sophie skipped off to her bedroom….

"I'm too old for Birthday's Kenz… Let's forget birthdays and go to the zoo or something – all three of us…"

Mac shook her head and gently cupped his cheek in her hand…

"Honey – I know you're an old grump over birthdays" she said winking at him… "But someone in there is very excited at her Uncle's birthday so don't be such a bah-humbug okay?"

Will snuck a look towards Sophie's room to make sure she wasn't in the lounge before pulling Mackenzie against him… "You know… There is one thing I do want for my birthday..." Will said, a mischievous grin appearing across his face…

"And what's that Mr Sleepy head?" Mac whispered, ruffling his hair…

"You!" Will whispered, pulling Mac's head towards him and kissing her hard on the mouth… "Just you and me, a bottle of champagne, not a lot of clothes and a very early night…. Special birthday present and all that…"

"mmmm – sounds like a nice birthday present – we'll have to see what we can do about that!" Mac whispered, dropping a kiss onto his lips…. "We just have to figure out a way for Soph to stay in her own bed all night!"

Will chuckled – that thought had been running across his mind too…

"You're the one that can work magic with her darling….. That's your challenge today – find a way to blackmail her!"

"Oh dear…." Mac said standing up... "Two months into parenthood and you're onto blackmailing already – I dread to think what that holds for the future!"

Mac dropped the lightest of kisses onto Will's lips…. "Right, I'm going to help Soph get washed and dressed… How about the famous McAvoy pancakes for breakfast? I'm starving!"

Will chuckled to himself and watched as Mackenzie disappeared after Sophie….. Really – he used to be master of his house before these two women invaded his home and stole his heart and took over his life… He often struggled to believe how his life had changed so much in the last eight weeks but really – he wasn't going to complain – he absolutely loved it!

* * *

Later that evening, after Sophie's bath time, Will poured a couple of glasses of wine and wandered over to the sofa…

"She looks shopped out!" Will joked, as he handed Mac a glass of red wine, careful not to wake Sophie who had fallen asleep in her brand new Beauty & The Beast PJs, stretched out along the sofa with her head laid in Mac's lap…

"She's not the only one…" Mac replied… "You may have been right… Think I may have needed a bit more sleep last night…"

"You okay apart from that?" Will asked… "You seem like you've got something on your mind…"

"I'm fine…" Mac replied, smiling up at Will….

Will shook his head and sat down the other side of Mac… "I love the way you think I'm totally stupid when it comes to your feelings Kenz…" Will muttered making himself comfortable… "And don't try to look innocent darling… something's on your mind – you've been so quiet since Sophie fell asleep…"

Mac thought about trying to make an excuse but one look at his face and she knew she wouldn't get away with telling him she was quiet because she was just tired…. Thankfully, Will knew not to push things with Mac – she now knew that he realised something was troubling her and she'd say it in her own good time…

"So come on – what did you girls buy when you were out?" Will said, nudging Mac with his shoulder… "Apart from more new PJs & clothes for this little monster…."

"You know I'm not going to tell you that Birthday boy!" Mac replied, glad the subject had been changed so swiftly…

"Soph seemed to have fun – she didn't stop nattering in the bath about the big shops!... I tried to get her to tell me what you bought and she just kept saying 'girls only secret'!" Will said, shaking his head…

"See - I have her trained well already…" Mac giggled, leaning against his side…

"That's what worries me – how much will you two gang up on me by the time she's eighteen? I don't stand a chance!"

"You love it really Billy!"

"I know!" Will admitted…. "And that's the thing - I was sitting here this afternoon watching the game on TV and everything just felt so odd and I realised it was just that I was missing you two so much… I do love it… I love hearing you two chattering away about whatever you two talk about, I love hearing your laughter, I even love your nagging and ganging up on me…"

One look at Will's face and Mac realised he wasn't joking – at first she was convinced he was but he was obviously so serious…

"Do you struggle to take it all in?" Mac asked, taking a sip of wine, her seriousness matching Will's… "With everything that's happened with us and Soph recently?"

Will nodded… "Yeah… Sometimes I think I'm gonna wake up and find out it's all a dream but… I suppose it's getting a bit easier to understand each day…."

"Having her with us makes me regret not having children myself…" Mac admitted in a whisper, much to Will's amazement… "I know that sounds silly but it's been on my mind for weeks now…."

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pressed a soft kiss to her temple…. "It's not too late darling…."

Mac looked up sharply at him surprised to hear what he had said…. "Really?"

"Yeah really…" he whispered, trailing a finger down the side of her face….

"You don't think we're too old?" Mac asked, hope blazing in her eyes…

"Of course not darling…. Maybe me a bit but definitely not you… I just didn't think you'd be keen – you never really showed much interest when we spoke about it years ago….." Will whispered as Mac turned her attention back to Sophie…

"Well that was before…" she whispered, a smile appearing on her face as Sophie stirred and snuggled into Mac's lap ever further…

Mac sighed and gazed down at Sophie laying across her lap – it was amazing how one little girl could bring so much joy into two people's life…. Mac had always known she loved Will with all her heart – she'd known that for many a year now but this little blonde haired angel seemed to be filling her with so many thoughts and feelings of wanting a child herself….

"You okay?" Will asked, noticing the thoughtful look on Mac's face as she softly stroked Sophie's hair….

"She called me Mummy today…" Mac whispered, not looking at Will… "We were getting some lunch and it just sounded so natural… She just turned around and called me Mummy – she didn't even know she'd said it…"

A moment later she felt Will snuggle as close to Mac as he could, wrapping both his arms around her and pressing a soft kiss to her temple… "I'm not surprised" he replied quietly…

"I know she just got confused for a moment because a couple of minutes later she called me Kenzie again but…"

Mac twisted her body slightly so she could see Will's face… "I don't know… I felt really guilty because of Jess mainly… and then I couldn't figure out why I didn't correct her…"

"Probably because you liked it…" Will whispered, resting his head against hers… "I know you don't like to think of it Kenz but to all intent and purposes you are her Mom – you're acting like a Mom to her – she's used to having just a mother figure around rather than a father figure… I'm pretty sure she'll call you it again at some point – it's just natural for her…"

"You think?"

"I do…. Kids aren't like us adults… They don't think and analyse everything before they speak – there's no filter in them – they just blurt out whatever is in their heads…."

Mac smiled and looked up at Will again… "Look at you becoming so sensible about Parenthood Mr!... I'm not sure you need me here anymore!"

"Don't even joke about that Kenz – I need you more than you'd ever begin to imagine…."

Will noticed the look on her face and carried on before she had a moment to say a word… "And I'm not kidding so don't look like that… What would I do without you at work? Here with Soph? What would I do without you by my side period?"

Mac felt a tear come to her eye and she'd been so determined not to get emotional any more…. "I love you Billy…"

"And I love you too although just saying that doesn't seem enough…" Will whispered leaning in for a soft kiss that turned into a much deeper kiss within seconds…. When they pulled apart a minute later Will tucked a strand of hair behind her ear…"And Kenz? If you ever want to think of us having kids ourselves then I'm more than up for it – you should know that…"

Very aware of the feelings coursing around her body and the little girl sound asleep in her lap, Mackenzie nodded and pulled away from Will slightly….

"I think you need to lift Sophie to bed…" Mac murmured, quickly leaning back for another short kiss … "It's getting late…"

"Mac – it's not even eight o'clock…"

Mac looked at him shaking her head… "I wonder about you sometimes Will…. Okay, I'll put it another way idiot… Maybe you and me… we could do with - you know – an early night… Maybe get around to that birthday present you were talking about this morning!"

"ohhhh" Will replied, a sheepish grin coming onto his face…. "I see what you mean! That certainly does sounds like a good idea!"

He chuckled as he immediately stood and lifted Sophie from Mac's lap… Sophie stirred slightly and opened her eyes sleepily but the moment she saw it was Will lifting her she smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck with her legs clinging monkey like, to his waist. She sighed, annoyed at being woken from her sleep, but quickly lifted her head again and kissed her Uncle on the cheek before burrowing her head as far into Will's neck as possible. She had fallen back asleep by the time Will & Mac had made it across the apartment to the bedroom.

Together, they made their way into Sophie's room for the bedtime routine that was becoming so familiar to them both… Mac lifted the duvet and Will placed Sophie into the bed and tucked Ginger Bear into her arms as Sophie curled herself into a ball… Mac switched off the lamp while Will covered her snugly with the duvet and whispered a tender goodnight to his niece… They then took turns in pressing a gentle kiss to her cheek and wishing her sweet dreams.… It was a little, simple routine but somehow it filled their hearts with so much love and pride just putting Sophie to bed together.

"You think she'll stay in there all night?" Will said, reaching for Mac's hand…

"I know she will!"

Will looked up, surprised at Mac's confidence on the subject…. "How do you know?"

"That would be telling Billy!"

"You've sunk to the levels of blackmail after all?" Will chuckled…

"Well, maybe I told her Ginger Bear gets tearful and upset when she leaves him in her room all alone so she has to stay with him all night tonight!"

"I'm not sure if that's genius or devious?"… Will chuckled…

"Me neither but there's just sometimes that I want you to myself Billy!" Mac said as she pulled him out of Sohpie's room and towards his bedroom….. "Come on - we have a lot of birthday celebrating to do…"


	14. Chapter 14

Will was right on that verge of sleep, the type when you're half awake and half asleep and you're really not sure if what's happening is in your dreams or in real life? He could feel a beautiful warm feeling wrapped all the way down his body and he knew that he felt more comfortable asleep than he had done in an awfully long time… Then there was a kiss – or what he thought was a kiss? It sure as hell fell like a kiss which was far too realistic to be part of a dream - it felt far too wonderful….

He opened his eyes slightly to see two big brown eyes shining back at him…. First he heard a giggle and then felt a gentle kiss to his lips before a soft hand stroked down the side of his face…

"Happy Birthday to you," she sung so very quietly the moment his eyes flickered open…. "Happy Birthday to you…" a pause for another soft kiss… "Happy Birthday Dear Billy…." A pause for a much longer kiss – a kiss that woke him completely… "Happy Birthday to you!"

"mmmm… that is a very nice way to start the day.." Will muttered as he let his hands wander up and down her naked back, relieved that they'd woken and there was no little four year old blonde monster in their room with them…

"Happy birthday darling…" Mac whispered before giggling and rolling over so she was flush on top of him, her naked body teasing his naked body awake…

"What time is it?"

"It's nearly six…" Mac whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him again…

"Mac – Believe me when I say I'm not complaining here – you can wake me up any time you want to like this but why the hell are you waking me up before six am on my birthday? We don't get to sleep in?"

"I'm waking you up to tell you to go back to sleep again Billy!"

That certainly got his attention and caused his eyes to open wide…. "You're what?"

"I had to wake you up to say go back to sleep until I wake you up again!"

"Mackenzie darling – did something happen to you during the night? Did you fall and knock your head or something…?"

Mac giggled and rolled off him reaching down the bed for Will's shirt that they'd ripped off last night… "Listen, Sophie & I have this `thing' planned – I don't want you to walk out in the middle of us getting it ready `cause Soph will be upset… So…. I was just saying – do me a favour and go back to sleep until we wake you!"

"You couldn't have just left me sleeping?"

"I could..." Mac whispered placing another kiss onto his lips... "But I wanted to say Happy Birthday!"

"But you're going to say happy birthday later with the `thing' - the thing with Sophie right?…"

"Yeah…. But I wanted to say Happy Birthday privately – without a four year old watching…." Mac explained her lips finding his again….

"hmmmm" Will replied seeing her point! He chuckled to himself and then pulled her back towards him and let his hands wander anywhere they could …. "No need for this shirt darling..." He whispered… "I think I may need – you know - a little encouraging to make me tired again… something that might wear me out…."

"No chance Billy – Soph will be up any moment and the last thing we need is her walking in on us!" Mac giggled… "There's no way I'm ready to explain what we'd be up to to a four year old girl…"

Mackenzie got out of bed and slipped into some leggings and Will's shirt and then threw some sweat pants and an old Jets t-shirt at Will… "Get dressed darling and go back to sleep for a bit and await your birthday party surprise... And please, please, please remember a four year old has planned this!"

"Hey – what's that supposed to mean?" Will asked as Mac came and perched on the edge of the bed next to him…

"It means my darling, that I know you're not a fan of birthdays – especially your own – but Soph is super excited so please play along okay and don't be a birthday grump!"

Will nodded and leaned into a long kiss just as they heard Sophie's bedroom door creak open…. "Sleep gorgeous… We'll be back soon-ish!" Mac whispered, dropping one last kiss onto Will's lips.

Mackenzie made her way into the kitchen just as Sophie was padding through the lounge looking extremely sleepy – as much as she woke up early every morning the little girl really wasn't a particularly bright morning person!

"Good morning darling…" Mac said brightly, plopping a kiss onto her head and causing a big smile to appear on Sohpie's face….

"Morning Kenzie…" Sophie mumbled sleepily, pulling out the stool in the kitchen and clambering up so she could see what Mac was doing…

"You sleep okay sweetie?" Mac asked, watching Sophie nod yes…. "And I didn't hear any tears tonight from Ginger Bear – that's because you stayed and cuddled him all night long rather than leaving him on his own and going into Uncle Billy's room…"

Sophie giggled and leant her sleepy head in her hands… "Can Ginger bear say happy birthday with us to Uncle Billy?"

"Of course he can darling…. Right... We have to make this cake then?" Mac said pulling out the bag of ingredients from the cupboard she'd hidden them in yesterday…."

"And then we have to blow up balloons…" Sophie added, an excited look appearing on her face…

"Then wrap up the birthday presents we bought yesterday Soph…"

"And draw a birthday picture for Uncle Billy…" Sophie added…

"And I think that's enough for the time being…" Mac answered, flicking the coffee machine on.

Coffee was most definitely needed at this unearthly hour on a Sunday morning!

Inside the bedroom, Will pulled on a t-shirt and slipped into his sweat pants as instructed and laid back down in bed tucking Mackenzie's pillow under his head – he wouldn't dare let anyone know just how much it comforted him to be able to smell her shampoo on the pillow and how often it helped him back to sleep when she wasn't there.

He rolled over and picked up his phone and pressed the buttons until he got the picture he wanted onto his screen… For a full ten minutes he stared at the picture of Mackenzie and Sophie, their cheeks pressed against each other and arms wrapped tightly around each other's neck. He loved these two girls more than he ever thought was possible to love two human beings – he'd come to realise quite quickly over the past two months that he couldn't live without either of them and maybe it was time to make that all official. All his life he'd longed to be part of a proper family, but ever since the day he'd met Mackenzie all those years ago, he knew she was the only one he'd ever consider making a family with but somehow, fate and the gods above hadn't seemed to realise it, until now that was. It might have taken them one hell of a long time to get to this position but they were finally there now - somehow over the past two months it had all slipped into place without him even really realising it. He placed the phone back on the side and sat up, swinging his legs out of bed his brain in full flow…

He reached into the drawer of his bedside table and pulled out the black velvet box that he'd bought home from work just the previous week. Opening the box Will smiled at the diamonds & emeralds gazing back at him and then smiled at the memory of that night months and months before in his office when Will had owned up to Mackenzie the story of the ring and how he had come to buy it. That was the night that Will finally realised that he had forgiven her for everything that had happened and hoped that he'd finally have a second chance at love with her. Of course, in true Will & Mackenzie fashion, it hadn't happened for months afterwards but that was the night it had finally hit him….

He stared at the ring and wondered whether it was too soon in Mackenzie's mind? It wasn't in his own head - he'd marry her tomorrow if he thought she'd go for it but there was just something playing on his mind from last night. They had spent most of the evening making love and as he was holding her close to him afterwards she suddenly whispered what did he think of a cousin for Sophie to grow up with? After their conversation earlier in the evening Will was surprised that she'd bought it up again so quickly but no sooner were the words out of her mouth, Mac pulled his mouth to hers and kissed him long and hard as if she was scared of the answer he would give… In true Mackenzie fashion she'd clammed up when he started to question her after the kiss and then she had started to make love to him again shortly after. She'd fallen asleep after that, snuggled tightly against his body but Will couldn't sleep – all he could think about was what she had said.

He put the ring back into the drawer and climbed back into bed and grabbed his phone again, this time sending an email and putting his plan into action…. Five minutes later and the email to Maggie was written and on its way. He slid back down into bed and pulled the covers over him wondering how long he had to stay in bed trying to figure out what all the noise was coming from the kitchen!

* * *

It was nearly eight am when Mac pushed open the bedroom door and together with Sophie and Ginger Bear they crept over to the bed where Will seemed to have dozed back to sleep….

"Wake him up Soph" Mac whispered, as Sophie clambered up the bottom of the bed and crawled up towards Will… "Gently though sweetie…"

Sophie looked up at Mac, only knowing how to tickle her Uncle awake…. Mac sat down on the side of the bed and shook Will gently which Sophie immediately copied… Still he didn't open his eyes but Mac had the feeling he might be playing games here – she knew Will well enough and he had always been a light sleeper!

"I think you need to be like the Prince in Sleeping Beauty Soph…" Mac whispered… "Give him a big sloppy kiss – maybe that will wake him up…"

Sophie giggled and leant over and placed a wet, slobbery kiss on Will's cheek as Mac shook his arm once again… Suddenly Will opened his eyes and grabbed Sophie pulling her into him and tickling her…. "Who's waking me up so early?" Will roared, winking at Mac and causing much giggling, squealing and general excitement from Sophie…

Mac watched as Sophie clambered free and gave Will such a big hug, her little lips plopping wet kisses on Will's cheek whenever she could…. Eventually she pulled herself free from Will and grinned.…

"It's your birthday Uncle Billy…" Sophie informed him – as if he had no idea it was his birthday…

"Is it?" Will asked in mock surprise…

Sophie giggled and looked at Mac…

"Ready?" Mac whispered and Sophie nodded wildly...

"Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday Uncle Billy, Happy Birthday to You!" they both sang in unison as Will watched on his heart so full of love….

"You have to blow out the candles out…." Sophie said, excitedly looking at the cake in Mac's hands…

Will couldn't help but chuckle at the look of the extremely flat cake in Mac's hands but one glare from Mac and he got the message… He leant over pulling Sophie with him… "Give me a hand Soph…"

Will's eyes danced with delight as Sophie clambered off the bed the second the candles were blown out shouting that she had presents to fetch… "Don't run pumpkin" Will shouted after her but she was already racing back out to the lounge…

"What happened with the cake?" Will asked, chuckling… Only Mackenzie could manage a half inch thick cake…

"It's not the size but the taste that matters!"

"Of course…" Will added smirking…

"Hey – it's edible - just! It was a little bit stressful and it's way too early on a Sunday to be baking a cake…"

"Me and Kenzie drew you a Happy Birthday picture…" Sophie squealed rushing back into the bedroom with balloons, the picture and a bag of presents….

She handed the picture over to Will and then dropped the bag onto Will's lap… "Birthday Presents!"

"Who are these from then?" Will asked but Sophie soon grabbed the bag back off him and started pulling the gifts out of the bag….

"This one's from me…. It's a pen…"

"SOPH!" Mac laughed, as Will chuckled pulling open the wrapping…

"Sophie – how did you manage to keep it a girl's secret right till the last minute?" Mac giggled…

Sophie giggled and cuddled into Will's side looking embarrassed as he pulled the silver pen from its box… "Oh Soph – it's beautiful – thank you darling…" Will said, pulling Sophie into his arms for a kiss…

"It's for you to use when you're on TV…" Sophie explained… "We had somebody write on it…" she added pointing at the pen…

"She means it's engraved.." Mac explained as Will look confused… "Read it.."

_"To Uncle Billy, Love you. Sophie." _Will whispered as he read the engraving along the side of the pen….

"Kenzie let me pick what to write…."

"Although I might add, we did have to cut it down from five sentences to six words!" Mac giggled…

Will's eyes glassed over with tears as he pulled Sophie into his arms and held her tightly… He looked up at Mac and mouthed a thank you as she watched on smiling happily… Sophie soon pulled away again and picked up the other gifts as Mackenzie cut the cake and put it onto three plates…. She wandered around to the other side of the bed and climbed in next to Will and watched as he opened the watch she had bought him…

"Kenz – it's beautiful…" he said a moment later, leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to her lips…. "Thank you…"

"I didn't know what else to get the man who has everything already!"

"It's perfect darling… thank you…"

Next Will opened a package containing a brand new New York Jets tshirt with a matching baseball cap…

"We got that 'cause we got paint on the other one!" Sophie giggled…

"It's wonderful… Thanks…." Will said, smiling at Sophie…

"It's better than the 'Beast' outfit she wanted to get you so you could play 'Beauty & The Beast' with her…" Mac whispered into his ear so Sophie couldn't hear!

Will chuckled and looked gratefully towards Mac as he leant over and grabbed a plate of cake… "Come on then – let's try this masterpiece of cooking!" he chuckled…

"We made it this morning while you were sleeping…" Sophie said, excited to see Will's reaction… "Kenzie said it's a special cake that's thin –not like our round cake we cooked the other day…." Sophie said, as Will shook his head at Mac…

"A special cake that's thin?" Will whispered…. "You really told her it was supposed to be like that?!"

"Shhhh – she doesn't know any different!" Mac said taking a mouthful of the cake…. "Play along – she doesn't need to know how rubbish I am at this kind of thing!"

Will chuckled and pulled Mackenzie into his side as Sophie went in search of the remote control for the TV….

"Hey – by the way…. I'm taking you out for a fancy dinner tonight…" Will whispered... "You need to be looking gorgeous and dressed up by seven thirty…."

"Dinner?" Mac asked sounding surprised…

"You know – dinner? The meal we eat in the evening time?"

"Very funny! Where?" Mac asked…

"It's a surprise!"

"Will – it's your birthday not mine…"

"Exactly and I want to take my girlfriend on a date… We've been back together for two months and we've not been out on a single date just you and me… So I'm taking you out - dinner, dancing – anything you want…."

"What about Soph?"

"What about her?" Will asked, nonchalantly nuzzling Mac's shoulder… "We can just leave her here alone right? Let's lock her in the wardrobe and no one will hear her cries?!"

"WILL!"

"Relax…. I'm joking… We have Maggie and Jim coming over to babysit…" Will announced looking pleased with himself… "I emailed Maggie to ask them while you were baking…. And I use the term 'baking' loosely!"

"Really? And Mag's was okay with that?" Mac asked, her excitement starting to show….

"Yep…. She couldn't wait! You know how much she adores Sophie – she's actually one of the few I trust to take care of our little monster…"

Mac melted inside whenever Will described Sophie as 'theirs'…. He was right though – they hadn't been on a single date together since they'd re-united and after everything they'd been through surely one night out would be okay…

"Sound okay?" Will asked, obviously worrying about Mac's sudden silence…

"I don't have a dress here?"…. Mac whispered….

"Well, maybe I'll have to treat you to a new outfit while we're out today! Sound okay?"

"Sounds perfect…." Mac whispered and curled herself into Will's arms as Sophie switched on the TV…

"Look – it's The Wiggles…." Sophie squealed… "It's on for your birthday Uncle Billy…. Can we watch the Wiggles? Pleeeaaaassseeeee?"

Will chuckled to himself – how could ever possibly say no to that little face? It seems Mackenzie was definitely teaching Sophie how to get around him… Will nodded and patted the bed for Sophie to join them…

Sophie ran back to the bed and climbed her way up and then snuggled herself in the middle of Will's legs, leaning her head back against his chest… Will automatically dropped a kiss onto the top of Sophie's head and then pulled Mac into him and wrapped his arm around her tightly… He didn't even care that the Wiggles was blaring from his TV screen at 8am on a Sunday morning - his birthday morning…. he had his two girls in his arms and that was just the most perfect way to start the day as far as he was concerned.

* * *

Will watched as Mac's eyes danced over the desert menu before reaching across the table and taking her hand in his…

"Enjoying yourself?" he asked, his thumb rubbing gently over the back of her hand…

"It's beautiful Will… I feel very spoilt and it's not even my birthday!"

Will chuckled and squeezed her hand a little tighter…. "It's me that's been spoilt – you and Sophie have managed to make this the best birthday I think I've ever had…. My cup runneth over…"

"It's because you're very loved by us both…" Mac whispered lovingly…

Will nodded his face suddenly becoming very serious…

"You okay?" Mac asked, noticing the look…

Will took a deep breath and then let it all out in one go… He'd really thought this would be easy to say but so far he'd put it off all night… He could feel the black box in his pocket right now – almost burning a hole…

"Will?" Mac asked, concerned… "What's wrong?"

Will looked up the moment he heard the concern in Mackenzie's voice…. "Sorry." he whispered, wiping the beads of sweat that had suddenly appeared on his brow…

"Mac…. I had planned to….. God… I don't know how to say this – I had it all so straight in my head this morning..."

"Billy? You know you can tell me anything okay…." Mac whispered, her concern growing by the second…

Will nodded and took a gulp of his scotch before taking a deep breath and pulling his chair a little closer to Macs…

"Mac – What you said last night? About wanting a cousin for Soph? Were…. Were you serious?"

Mac didn't even hesitate this time… she nodded her head and reached for his hand, her bottom lip automatically slipping between her teeth… "I think so yeah…. I mean – I'd never thought about it really – well I never expected to be in the position of deciding that… but now with everything that's happened with you and me – yeah…. I really do…"

"Really?"

Mac sighed and nodded, trying hard to keep herself from crying… "I've been thinking about it for weeks Will… Since Sophie came along I've got all these odd feelings inside of me and I think it's just I'm desperate to have a baby all of a sudden… I really didn't expect for that to happen to me…"

"Why didn't you say anything before?"

"I was just worried it was a thing – like a crush sort of thing - because of Sophie…. But this feeling – it won't go away Will – if anything it's just getting stronger and stronger every day…."

Will sighed, feeling mightily relieved that him and Mac were at least on the same page here…. "It's all I can think of since you said it last night…" Will gushed… "It's just been playing a loop in my head over and over again…."

Mac giggled and smiled so happily that it melted Will a little… Time to be brave Will thought to himself….

"So… what we're saying is that we want to try for a baby? You and me?" Will whispered squeezing her hand tightly…

Mac suddenly found she couldn't speak but she did manage to nod her head wildly….

"And, if we decide to try for a baby it must mean you want us two together for ever?" Will said with a sparkle in his eye….

Mac laughed before she realised he was serious…. "Of course – I thought we already knew that Billy…"

"I did – but I was just making sure…" Will said, pulling the black velvet box from his pocket… He took a look at the look of complete and utter shock on Mackenzie's face as he slowly opened the box to reveal a platinum band covered in diamonds and emeralds….

"Marry me?"

"Oh Billy…" was all that Mac could manage to utter…

"Mac – let's make it official…. I've learnt so much over the past couple of months with Jess and Sophie and you and I… I've learnt that we should never wait until tomorrow to do what we want because tomorrow may never come along… I don't want to wait any longer Kenz… I never realised quite how much I loved you before but I do now – more than you could ever imagine…"

Mac sighed, hardly believing the words that were falling from his lips…

"Mackenzie, you complete me in every way and I want you to be my wife.… I want the three of us to be a family - the three of us and any other little ones that might come along…"

Will reached forward and wiped the single tear that had trickled out of Mac's eye and onto her cheek…. His words were so simple - so simple but they said everything that needed to be said…. Will watched as the realisation of what he said made its way through Mackenzie's shocked brain…

"What happened to the other ring?" Mackenzie finally whispered…. "That's not the ring you showed me before…."

Will chuckled – it was so Mackenzie like to actually forget the question in hand and move onto something else…. "I couldn't use it Kenz… I chose this last week instead – I know you liked the other ring but it just bought back too many memories of me being a prick… You deserve better…."

Mac smiled and looked into his eyes so deeply….

"You like the new one?" Will asked, suddenly worried she didn't like the ring….

"It's beautiful Billy…. Even more beautiful than the last one if that's possible…."

Will smiled and squeezed her hand a little tighter…. "Emeralds signify eternity – did you know that….?"

"Eternity signifies endless time… forever…" Mac whispered in reply….

"And that's what I want darling – you and me together for all the time we have left on this earth and even beyond… I don't want to spend a single moment apart from you Mackenzie…."

Mac smiled and tried so hard not to cry…. She pulled both his hands into hers… "You really mean this Will? You want us to be married? To start a family?"

"I've never been more sure of anything…. I wouldn't ever say something like this if I didn't mean it – you know that… Mackenzie - When you're not with us… I miss you so much... Forget Sophie in all this – I miss you… I miss us waking up together every morning…. I just want you with me – all the time Kenz – I hate it when you go to your apartment in the week…. I want us to be Mr & Mrs McAvoy… that's all…."

Mackenzie giggled again and moved right on the edge of her seat so her legs slotted in-between Will's…

"Oh Billy – I'd love to marry you…. Yes!" She whispered, leaning forwards and pressing her lips so gently onto Will's….

"Yes?" Will repeated, just to be sure, when she pulled apart from him a moment later…

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" Mac squealed….

Mackenzie flung herself forward and wrapped her arms tightly around Will's neck, not caring who was watching them in the restaurant and not caring that she was getting a little carried away…. "Yes! Yes! Yes!" she whispered in his ear again and again…

Will pulled apart from her and planted a long kiss onto her lips…. "So that's a 'yes' I take it?!" he joked….

"Yes! It's a Yes!" Mac repeated again, causing Will to laugh out loud as he lifted the ring from the velvet box… He looked around as he heard whispers and sighs from their fellow diners and then slipped the ring onto her finger and then pressed his lips onto her finger so he was kissing the ring as well as her hand….

When he finally pulled his lips from her hand a moment or two later he pulled her into his arms and held her against his body…. He could feel her heart thumping away in her chest and he knew it was probably just matching his own…

"Are we really doing this?" she asked, tears building in her eyes…

"It's about time we did – I've only been in love you for close on ten years…!" Will replied, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear….

When she sat back in her chair a moment later she gazed down at the ring before looking up at him… "I think we better tell Sophie that she's going to be a bridesmaid!"


	15. Chapter 15

Plans for telling Sophie their news on Monday after school didn't go exactly as they had planned because by the time midday came Mackenzie was going downhill very fast…. The sneezes and the tiredness that had plagued Mac for most of the weekend had turned into something so much more and after she'd nearly fainted twice in an hour, Will had demanded she go home to rest and dose up. Much to Mac's annoyance, he packed her off in a cab at midday, promising her he would call her later and adding that he wouldn't tell Sophie their news until she was there with them.

The rest of Monday went okay but it was Tuesday morning when Will experienced Sophie's first complete and utter meltdown since she'd been living with him… Their normal pre-school routine was doing fine until Sophie realised Mac hadn't rung them from the office as she always did in the mornings… After asking Will why there was no call he had quickly explained that Mac was sick and was probably still sleeping at her own apartment. In his rush to get them ready in time he didn't explain that it was just a cold and he didn't say that they'd call Mac from the office after school – he just hurried her into her room to get her shoes on and finish getting ready for school.

It was five minutes later, when she wasn't standing at the front door waiting as usual that he raced down the hallway and into her room to find her curled up in the corner of her bed, holding her beloved Ginger bear in her arms tightly, tears streaming down her face… Will dropped his bag on the floor and rushed over to her bed, pulling her into his arms with absolutely no idea what the hell was wrong with her… He tried desperately to soothe her but the tears were falling so fast that she could hardly breathe let alone talk to him… It was a full twenty minutes later when Will had carried her back to the kitchen and sat her in her favourite place on top of the kitchen counter and she was sipping a juice that she finally managed to tell Will what was wrong.

As Will wiped her tears away with a face cloth she sobbed that she didn't want her Kenzie to get sick because when her Mummy was sick and was sleeping she never woke up. Will felt tears of his own fill his eyes when Sophie started to cry again saying she didn't want her Kenzie Mummy to live with the angels like her first Mummy did and that she still wanted to do jigsaws and go shopping to the big shops again with her Kenzie.

Will cursed is own damn stupidity at not explaining things better to Sophie and not even realising the possible thoughts in her own little head. She had accepted everything that had happened with her own Mummy so easily and fit herself completely and utterly into Will's life that sometimes he forgot just how vulnerable her emotions could be.

In a desperate attempt to appease her tears he held her tightly and assured her that Kenzie was going to be just fine and then he wiped every tear away and soothed her until she had no more tears left to cry. It was only when he cut her a slice of Mac's very thinly baked birthday cake that she seemed to cheer up as Will distracted her with plans for visiting Mac after school… He promised Sophie that he would come and collect her from school rather than Rosa and together they would go and see Mac to make sure she was getting better and cheer her up. Although she was an hour late for school by the time Will took her into her classroom she had cheered up and seemed to be back to her normal self excitedly looking forward to see Mackenzie later.

Once Sophie was safely inside, Will leant on the wall outside Sophie's school and smoked his first cigarette in a while. He had promised Mac faithfully that he would give them up and he had on the whole, but every now and then – usually after stressed filled moments – he would give in to his demons. As he hailed a cab outside the school gates, Will called Jim explaining that he would be late and for Jim go ahead and start the pitch meeting, promising faithfully he would be there within the hour.

Will let himself into Mac's apartment with the key she had recently given him and crept into the bedroom… Mac was curled up in a ball right in the middle of her bed, her hair splayed out across the pillows and the duvet pulled up to her nose. She looked like she hadn't moved for hours! Being careful not to disturb her, Will strolled out to the kitchen and put away the groceries he had bought her and then made a breakfast of tea, English muffins, a slice of Victoria sandwich and a large glass of orange juice.

Just as he was about to head back to the bedroom he heard a sigh behind him and he looked up to see Mac looking very sorry for herself, dressed in an old pair of pyjama bottoms and an old baseball hoody of his… It wasn't a classic look for a man to melt at but she looked so adorable standing before him Will felt his heart start to ache in his chest …

"I hate being sick Billy…" she whined before he even got a chance to say anything….

"I know you do sweetheart…"

Will made his way over to her and pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest and loving how much he seemed to relax just feeling her next to him…. "You feeling any better?" he asked as he dropped a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth….

Mac nodded and pulled away slightly… "I do actually but I don't want you to catch any germs…" she muttered her eyes noticing the small feast on the kitchen counter…

"I won't catch anything – I told you before I'm a medical marvel!" Will said pushing her towards the sofa and reaching for the tray of food… "And besides, after the weekend, I'm pretty sure I've caught it if I'm going to catch it!"

Mac waited for Will to sit in the corner of the sofa before she plonked herself down next to him and pulled the throw down over their laps… Will set the tray on his lap and handed Mac the plate of English muffins and marmalade. Will chuckled as he watched her eyes light up at the taste of the food – she often craved her English foods when she was sick - she drank coffee all year round but whenever she was sick it had to be tea – early grey of course!

"Why aren't you at work?" Mac asked in-between a mouthful of muffin… "You shouldn't be slacking because I'm sick!"

"Always the EP eh Mac?" Will mumbled…

"I just want the show to be okay – they need one of us there Billy and you promised me yesterday if I went home you'd take care of things there for me…"

"I know, I know… I just needed to see you before I headed into the office…" Will sighed before reaching for Mac's spare hand…. "Sophie was so upset this morning – we had a complete and utter meltdown…"

Mac looked up suddenly, a mixture of worry and concern on her face….

"It's okay…." He said trying to allay Mac's worried look…. "She's fine now but it was pretty awful at the time… She was an hour late for school… It's all my fault - I just didn't think and I'm so fucking annoyed with myself for being so stupid…"

"What happened?"

"Everything was okay – we were going through our morning routine as normal and then she suddenly realised you hadn't called…. She asked why and because we were running late I just said you were sick… I didn't think too much about it and told her to get ready for school quickly…. Five minutes later, I found her in her room sobbing and when I finally calmed her down she was crying because her Mom was sick and never woke up…."

Mac put her muffin down and sat up straight…. "Oh Will… I should have set my alarm and called…."

"No – don't be silly…. I just didn't think Mac… See – this is where I'm rubbish at this parent lark…. I felt so bad Kenz – I've never seen tears like it before – at one point she was inconsolable – I tried to pick her up from the bed and she was kicking and pushing me away – just sobbing for you and then Jess…."

Mac saw the tears fill his eyes before he roughly wiped them away…. She reached out for him and pulled him into her arms…. "You're not rubbish – you hear me? It's just one of those things…"

"I just didn't think…. I didn't know how to handle her Mac – it scared the crap out of me…"

"Will, neither of us truly know what we're doing with her really… We're blessed that she's such a good girl – she's made this whole thing easier for us with the way she's accepted everything – this kind of breakdown was always going to happen – I'm amazed it hasn't happened sooner…."

"Mac - I needed you there this morning - You can always stop her tears…."

"But you did okay in the end Will – she calmed down eventually…"

"But only because I bribed her with seeing you later after school… that and cake!"

Mac giggled and ran her hands through his hair… "My cake? And that helped?!"

Will chuckled and leant his head back against the sofa and sighed…. "You have to move in with us Mac… Things like this – it could have been avoided if you were there and she'd seen you this morning… I don't know what's stopping you now – we're engaged - we're talking about trying for a baby soon…"

Mac leant her head against his and sighed too – she didn't even know what was stopping her now – at first she didn't want to take over his relationship with Sophie but as Will had just said – they were engaged, getting married, talking about children of their own for goodness sake – she had to bite the bullet sometime and finally accept that this was for real this time – that they were already a family - so why weren't they living as one?

"Just promise me you'll think about it today Mac…." Will whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her head….

"I will…" Mac whispered in reply as she snuggled into his side and closed her eyes.

Although she was feeling much better it didn't' take Mac long until she had fallen asleep leant against him. As much as Will wanted to close his eyes and stay with her, after about ten minutes he pulled himself out from her and settled her down on the sofa, covering her with her duvet from the bedroom. He left a note for her telling her he was at work and leaving firm instructions for her to dose herself up with cold medications and to make sure she ate the chicken soup he'd left in the fridge for her. He desperately wanted her well again for Sophie that afternoon.

* * *

Mackenzie had obviously taken heed because as Will and Sophie slipped quietly inside her apartment door six hours later the difference in Mac was amazing - she looked almost back to her normal self…. Will watched with a relieved look on his face as Sophie realised Mac was well and up and about and he more than appreciated the effort Mac had made to look well for Sohpie… An effort that didn't go un-noticed by the little girl - the moment her eyes saw Mac sitting on the sofa flipping through a magazine she raced across the room and threw herself at Mac….

"Be gentle Soph…" Will shouted but it was already too late…. Sophie had jumped up onto Mac's lap pushing her back against the back of the sofa…

"She's okay…" Mac whispered from the sofa as Will set Sophie's bag onto the floor and slipped off his jacket….

Sophie giggled and immediately straddled herself across Mac's lap and slung her arms around Mac's neck…. "Are you still sick Kenzie?" Sophie asked innocently….

"It was just a cold darling…. I'm feeling much better…." Mac replied which seemed to satisfy Sophie enough to close her eyes and rest head on Mackenzie's shoulder…

"Sorry I missed our call this morning…" Mackenzie added as she swayed side to side with Sophie…

"Someone's pleased to see you…" Will said as he sat down next to his girls and watched as Mac pressed about a dozen kisses into Sophie's hair….

"What?" Mac whispered a moment later when she caught the look of adoration on Will's face…

He leant back against the sofa and shook his head gently…. "It's just you two together like this.… it melts my old heart!"

Mac smiled and leant across and pressed the softest of kisses to his lips as Sophie stayed snuggled firmly against Mac's chest… "You big softy!"

Will chuckled and then nodded before turning his attention to his niece…. "So Soph – we've got something exciting to tell you…." Will said, laying his arm around Mackenzie's shoulder and gently rubbing Sophie's arm with his other hand….

Sophie sat up slightly and looked wide eyed at Will, her arms still wrapped around Mackenzie's neck before a massive grin appeared on her face… "Are we going to watch the Belle & Beasty movie?"

Mac giggled at the disappointed look on Will's face before sitting Sophie up straight…. "Maybe you and me can watch it later when Uncle Billy goes back to work but we wanted to tell you that… well – we're getting married – me and Uncle Billy are getting married…."

Sophie looked at Mackenzie and then Will and then back to Mac again with a look of total confusion on her face… This is the part where Mackenzie had absolutely no idea what to say or do next… It was the part that made her realise that her and Will were generally making this parenthood lark up as they went along…. Did Sophie even know what getting married was Mac suddenly thought to herself – if not – how the hell do you explain a marriage ceremony to a four year old girl? She looked across at Will for inspiration just as Sophie gave up on the conversation and started to scramble down to the floor…

"Hey Soph…" Will said, catching Sophie's hand before she had a chance to move any further… He pulled her back up onto his knee and held onto her hand… "That means that Kenzie is going to live with us – how good is that? Then we're going to have to take a trip to Church, have a big party and then all three of us live together all the time… Sounds cool yeah?"

"Kenzie will live with us?" Sophie repeated, a smile replacing the confusion from before…

Mac nodded and placed her hand on Sophie's thigh…. "If that's okay with you darling?" Mac replied….

Sophie giggled and nodded her head wildly before she reached for Mac's hand as she saw the diamond ring sparkling on her finger for the first time…

"That's pretty Kenzie…" Sophie whispered as she started to run her fingers across the diamonds and emeralds…

"Do you think she has any idea what we're talking about?" Mac whispered to Will as Sophie started to lazily twirl the ring on Mackenzie's finger…

"Not a clue…" Will whispered and gently stroked the back of Sophie's hair…

"Is it new?" Sophie asked, eyes wide and watching as the diamonds caught the early spring sunlight shining through the window.…

Mac giggled slightly and nodded to Sophie…. "Yes sweetie, Uncle Billy bought it for me because we're going to get married… Do you know what getting married means?"

Sophie looked confused again and gently stroked the back of Mac's hand while she obviously tried to process what Mac was saying… Just as Mac was about to give up on the whole subject Sophie suddenly smiled and shuffled excitedly on Will's lap…

"Like when Beasty turns into a handsome Prince and dances with Belle at the end of the movie?" The words flew out of Sophie's mouth so quickly and so enthusiastically that it bought a tear to Mac's eye….

"Yes darling –just like that…." Mac said gripping Sophie's hand tightly…

"And when Beasty turns into the Prince he kisses Belle like Uncle Billy kisses you..." Sophie shouted loudly much to Mac's amusement and Will's embarrassment….

"That's it darling – yes…" Mac whispered, thrilled that Sophie seemed to understand what was happening – even if it was a Beauty and the Beast version of a wedding….

"Wow…." Sophie exhaled before sliding of Will's lap and standing between Mac's legs…. "And will you get to wear a pretty white dress like Belle? She looks so pretty Kenzie…."

"Yes – and you will too… You have to be my bridesmaid which means you have to help me all day long and walk with me in the Church…. And that means you and me can go shopping with Auntie Sloan and we can all buy pretty new dresses and new shoes – how does that sound?"

"Can I get a dress like Belle's yellow one?" Sophie squealed...

"You can get any dress you like darling…" Mac whispered placing the softest of kisses on Sophie's cheek…

"And is Uncle Billy going to be the handsome Prince?"

Mac giggled and looked from Sophie to Will… She smiled and let her head lean against his… "Uncle Billy is always my handsome Prince Soph…." she whispered before leaning in and kissing Will softly…

"You're kissing again!" Sophie squealed pulling Mac away from Will…

Will chuckled as Sophie started to jump up and down on the spot before rushing over to the chair where her bag was sat…

"I always knew Beauty and the Beast would come in handy one day…" Mac sighed as Will watched Sophie rummage through her school bag…

"I still don't think she really knows what we're talking about…." Will said as Sophie pulled the contents of her bag out on the floor… "What are you looking for Soph?"

Sophie didn't answer but soon found the envelope she had obviously been looking for and ran back towards Will & Mac holding out the letter…. Will reached out his hand to take the letter but Sophie pulled back and shook her head, putting the letter behind her back….

"My teacher said we had to give this to our Mummy…." Sophie said grinning happily and holding the letter out towards Mackenzie…

For a moment neither moved as Sophie held the letter for Mac to take…. Although Will had seen hints of Sophie thinking of Mackenzie as a Mother it was the first time he'd actually heard the words come out of her mouth. He continued to watch with a glazed look in his eyes as Mac slowly reached forward and took the letter from Sophie. Before she opened it she pulled Sophie to stand in between her legs and gently pressed a soft kiss onto the top of her head.

A moment later after Mac had opened the letter she looked up at Will with watery eyes… "It's for a Mother's Day party at School…" she softly whispered to Will…

"Hey – that sounds like fun…" Will said, trying to brighten the almost sombre atmosphere that had taken over the room….

"It's just for us to bring our Mummy's into school…." Sophie said to Will so seriously… "You can't come to play 'cause you're not my Mummy – Kenzie's my Mummy now…."

The little girl turned from Will and gazed up at Mac her bright blue eyes dancing with excitement… "Will you come and play at the party with me Kenzie? Pleeeeeaaaasseeee?"

Mac didn't hesitate before she started to nod her head, much to Sophie's delight… "Of course I'll come to the party sweetheart…. I'd love to…"

Sophie's happy smile that was spread across her face got even wider if that was possible and she threw herself into Mackenzie's arms excitedly before jumping back and grabbing the TV remote from the table… "Can we watch Dora?" she asked pulling out the big bean bag she always lounged on when she was at Mackenzie's apartment… Will nodded a silent yes to Sophie before taking the invitation from a stunned Mackenzie's hand… He read it over and started to chuckle to himself at the look of complete shock on Mac's face…

"You'll be fine darling…" he whispered as he leant back on the sofa knowing already that Mac was starting to panic inside…

"It says we have to bake a bloody cake to take along…" Mac replied almost trancelike… "I'm a baking disaster Will…."

Will laughed out loud as he pulled Mackenzie into his side…. "Well, it's a good job that I'm not eh?"

* * *

For the third time that day Will let himself into Mackenzie's apartment exactly an hour after he'd come off air that evening. After a brief visit to Charlie, he'd somehow managed to escape Jim's concerns over the show and get back to his apartment to grab a fresh change of clothes for him and Sophie for the morning before heading straight over to Mac's.

Noticing the lounge and kitchen was in complete darkness, Will slid the lock across her apartment door and crept towards the bedroom…. Mac looked up as he pushed the door open and Will couldn't help the flutter in his chest as he saw Sophie cuddled into Mac's side in the bed… Mac, who had obviously been studying something on her laptop screen, pushed the lid down and smiled as Will walked towards the bed…

"Hey…"

Will leant down and kissed her tenderly on the lips….

"Where was your head tonight?" Mac whispered as Will sat on the edge of the bed…. "You seemed all over the place…"

"You watched?" Will asked shaking his head slightly…

"Of course we watched…" Mac answered reaching for his hand and squeezing it tightly…

"I was kind of hoping you'd fallen asleep before the show…"

"Hey – one good thing - Sophie thought you were absolutely brilliant…." Mac whispered as she nodded her head towards the little girl sleeping soundly next to her…. "Did something happen?"

Will shook his head… "No… I have no idea how it went so wrong tonight…"

"Are you okay? Mac asked… She wondered whether he had something on his mind for him to let it affect him while he was on air…

"Yeah…" Will mumbled... "Don't know what happened really…. Lost it at some stage during the B Block and it kind of went downhill after that… Can't even put my finger on what went wrong…."

"See what happens when I'm not there to keep you in line?" Mac joked but Will didn't even smile….

"I had to apologise to Charlie tonight…. I haven't felt like I needed to do that ever since the Palin fiasco when you first started…."

"Come on – don't worry… Everyone has bad day's darling…. Just forget it and move on.…"

Will nodded again and took a look at Sophie… "Shall I lift her to the other room?"

"Please… I promised her she could watch the show in here for tonight but I didn't have the heart to move her afterwards – the heart or the energy…"

"You two look way too comfortable there for me to disturb you… Shall I leave her and… "

"Hey – don't even think about it buster" Mac interrupted…. "Lift her please. I've slept without you two nights in a row Billy – I need you next to me tonight…"

Will chuckled and made his way around the bed to lift Sophie and carried her into Mac's tiny spare room and then tucked her into bed before making his way into the kitchen and grabbing himself a beer… As he climbed into Mac's bed a few minutes later he sighed and pulled her closely to his side…

"I missed you tonight…." Will whispered as he dropped a kiss to her forehead… "Not as my girlfriend – as my EP…. It just doesn't feel right any more without you in my ear Kenz…."

Mac tutted and wrapped her arm around his waist…. It was very rarely that she was lost for words but on this occasion she was…. She tightened her grip around him and felt Will snuggle closer into her side and lean his head on her shoulder… He picked up the remote control and flicked on the TV trying to find highlights of his beloved Jets who had been playing earlier…

"Don't depress yourself – they lost!" Mac giggled…

"I know – Don took great pleasure in telling me so!" Will chuckled and took a sip of his beer… He finally found the channel he was looking for and for the first time since he'd left Mac & Sophie earlier he felt himself relax….

"Sophie hasn't stopped going on about the Mother's day thing at school…." Mac whispered a moment or two later…

Will noticed straight away just how tense Mac sounded about it already – he decided the best course of action would be to play it down…. "She's just excited – she'll calm down by the morning…"

"I can't believe we have to take a cake in…"

"It's just a cake Mac – don't worry about it…"

"They seriously expect you to take a home baked cake in? What kind of school is it? It's madness…"

"Forget the cake Kenz…"

"Can't I just buy one and sprinkle some icing sugar over the top or something to make it looked homemade?"

"That's cheating Mackenzie!" Will said trying his best to sound stern and not laugh at the same time…

"It's not cheating - it'll be home baked by someone – just not me…"

"And you want to teach Sophie that's it's okay to cheat?" Will whispered, finally realising just how worried Mac was about it…. "Darling – please don't worry, we'll bake the cake together on the Thursday afternoon before you have to take in the following morning… You, me and Soph – it'll be great…"

"When – we'll be at work?"

Will sat up slightly and looked at Mac… "We'll take the day off – book a couple of day's holiday… We can take Soph to school together and then spend a lazy day before picking her up and making the cake in the afternoon…. Then Friday is the party so we'll just have a chilling day… Sound okay?"

Mac smiled and then nodded before she leant her head back against the head board…. "Maybe we could go house hunting too?"

That certainly got Will's attention…. "House hunting?" he repeated, thrilled that Mac had even been thinking about it…

"I was browsing some places earlier online… Will, there's a beautiful Brownstone, three storey place right opposite Central Park… I know you have your apartment but I thought it would be nice to have more of a family home? Especially if there's a new baby coming along? What do you think?"

Will thought she looked more excited at that moment than he'd seen for a long time… She reached down onto the floor and picked up her laptop desperately wanting to show Will the Brownstone….

Will watched as Mac showed him every image of the house and he couldn't miss the excitement in her voice… "Billy it's so lovely – I've always longed to live in a place like this…. Think of all the weekend fun we could have in the park with Soph…. Maybe we could get a Puppy?"

"Woahhh…. Slow down Kenz… A puppy?"

"yeah… Soph would love it…"

"And who would have to exercise the damn thing?"

"You! Come on, you need more exercise the older you get….!" Mac giggled which earned her a stern look from Will…

"It does looks perfect…" Will muttered a few moments later as he looked once again at the images…. As he did a few quick sums in his head he realised it was just that – the perfect family home for them all… "I love it Kenz…."

"Really?" Mac squealed sounding more excited by the second… "I thought you might be upset at the thought of leaving your apartment…."

"No – not at all… it's beautiful – absolutely perfect for a family….. How about I ring them first thing in the morning to arrange a viewing – we'd need to move quick on a property like this…."

Mac smiled and slid the lap top back on the floor and snuggled into Will's side….

"You okay?" Will asked feeling her tighten her grip around his waist again…

"It's terrifying Will this party thing at school – I'm not sure I can do this…"

Will chuckled and shook his head not believing what he was hearing…. Here's a woman who is one of the best in her chosen field of work, she had lived in a war zone for over two years, could out-talk and out-smart most people Will knew and here she was worried about a classroom full of Mothers and cakes… He pressed a kiss to the side of her head and rubbed her arm soothingly…

"You'll be fine Kenz – don't get yourself into a state over it…."

"But baking a cake to take to a School Mother's Day party Will? When I can't bake and I'm not a Mother? Whatever Sophie thinks I'm not her Mother…."

"Hey come on… We've been through this before... Soph thinks of you as her Mother – to all extent and purposes you are her Mother darling…. Accept it and stop worrying…"

Mac sat up straight and grabbed the remote from Will and put the Jets game on mute…. She turned so she was facing Will and reached for his hand… "I'm serious Will… All evening I've just kept thinking about Jess."

"What about Jess?" Will asked, his face suddenly serious…

"Thinking what she would think about all this Will…. The last time I saw her we had the biggest of all rows… she hated me for what I'd done to you and don't try to say she didn't because she told me so herself… I get that she was angry Will but you McAvoy's take a freaking long time to forgive people… How would she feel about this situation Billy? How would she feel about me taking over her role as Mother for her daughter?"

Will noticed the single tear rolling down the side of Mac's cheek and gently wiped it away…. "I think she'd be extremely relieved that Sophie is so happy and loves you so very much…. I bet if she's watching down now she's more than happy at how Sophie is with you…."

"But she hated me Will… If that were me I wouldn't want someone I hated looking after my daughter for the rest of her life…"

"Mac – she only felt that way because of how I felt… You know how close Jess & I were when you and I split up… She saw me hurt and angry at you so she was hurt and angry with you… Darling, I guarantee if Jess knew just how much I loved you these days and just how happy you make me - and Sophie - then she'd be thrilled at you taking over her role – I honestly believe that to be true Kenz…"

Mac sighed and attempted a smile at Will but she wasn't convinced…

"Mackenzie, I can't ever prove to you what I just said but I know my Sister… If Jess were here and could see how happy we are, how we want to be married, how we want kids of our own then she would have changed that will to say that she wanted William & Mackenzie McAvoy to be legal guardians of her daughter…. She loved you deep down Mac… You two were inseparable once upon a time…. Remember?"

This time Mac managed a smile as she let her mind wander back to happier times with Jess and as she felt Will wrap her arm around her and bring her close to his side she could kind of see what he was saying…

"And besides…" Will added… "None of that really matters Kenz… What matters is that Sophie thinks of you as her Mother figure and me as her Father figure…. I know it's awkward right now with names and our roles and everything but it won't always be like that… Soph doesn't think it's awkward – she hears the phrase 'Mom' and thinks of you… Accept it as the wonderful compliment it is and enjoy it darling – you fit the role so wonderfully well…."

Mac smiled gratefully at Will's words and leant back in his arms trying her best to accept what he was saying…. "I hope you're right…" she whispered…

"Aren't I always?" Will joked as he leant over and switched off the lamp and then the TV…. He slid down the bed until his head was rested on the same pillow as Mackenzie and pulled her snugly into his body…. Mac lifted her head and then rested it down on Will's shoulder – a position she'd never tire of laying in… She gently pressed her lips into his chest and wrapped her arm around his waist…

"Night Kenz…" she heard the love of her life whisper into her ear… "I love you darling…" he added as he closed his eyes…

"I still don't understand why we have to bake a cake?" Mac replied earning her a chuckle from Will…

"Because that's what Mothers and Daughters do Kenz…" he replied sleepily…

"Absolute rubbish!" Mac exclaimed.… "My Mother never once baked a cake with me…"

"And that was probably because you were too busy trying to impress your Father and his cronies with politics and the like, but normal Mothers & Daughters do that kind of thing darling I assure you…"

Mac turned on her side slightly and let her legs tangle with his – she really did like to have every part of their bodies touching as they slept… She closed her eyes and relished the feeling of Will gently rubbing her back in that soothing manner he always used….

"Are you saying I'm not normal?" Mac whispered, giggling into his chest…

"I'm not answering that on the grounds that I may incriminate myself my darling…. Now sleep Kenz… I need you well and back at work tomorrow – it just doesn't work with someone else in my ear each night - I miss you too much when you're not there with me – it all just falls apart..."

Mac smiled to herself as she heard him start to snore gently… She'd had a feeling as she was watching the show earlier it was simply a case of things not feeling right for him when she wasn't by his side - at work or at home. It was a feeling that she was experiencing more and more herself these days.

As she closed her eyes and let herself slowly fall to sleep she couldn't help but get a warm fuzzy feeling inside remembering back to Sophie's face earlier inviting her to the party – she had lost count of the number of times over the years when she'd dreamt of playing Happy Families with Will – it was a dream she'd never, ever expected to become a reality but as she stared at the diamonds in her ring catching the light she finally accepted that maybe - well maybe it seemed like dreams did come true after all. She was here in the love of her life's arms, engaged with a new home, a wedding and a baby in their future plans and the most adorable little girl filling their lives with love and happiness – if that didn't seem like a dream come true then Mackenzie didn't know what did.

* * *

**A/N - That's officially the last chapter as I think this story has pretty much run it's course - although I do have an epilogue in my mind if people are interested? **

**Thanks very much to Lilac for the wonderful prompt in the first place :) and thanks very much to those of you who have taken the time to reply - you really do have no idea how much a review/reply inspires us writers into getting on with the next chapter. Sadly, I think the lack of replies is half the reason this board has gotten so quiet lately but hopefully things will pick up with Season 2. **

**Hope you've enjoyed this...**

**x**


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